Who's No. 1?
Following one of the strangest opening weeks of basketball that NBA fans have seen in a long time, it's difficult to figure out which way is up. The good teams are bad, and the bad teams are good.
Defending champion Miami gets pummeled on ring night by 42 to up-and-coming Chicago, which proceeds to fall to both Orlando and Sacramento. Phoenix loses three of its first four games, Dallas goes winless and suffers an embarrassing rout at the hands of its other in-state rival Houston, and after a great 3-0 start, the Lakers lose in Seattle by 16.
Meanwhile, the only undefeated teams in the league are … Philadelphia, New Orleans and Utah? Nothing seems to make sense.
As Slim Pickens said in the classic Mel Brooks film "Blazing Saddles," "What in the wide world of sports is a-goin' on around here?" Trying to rank these teams is impossible, so I'm just going to list them in alphabetical order.
Here are Yahoo! Sports' NBA "rankings" after one crazy week of play (records and statistics are through Nov. 5).
Atlanta Hawks (2-1) – Joe Johnson might have been the best player in the league for the week.
Boston Celtics (0-3) – Defense is still an issue for the Celtics. They're giving up 105 points a game.
Charlotte Bobcats (1-2) – Adam Morrison isn't known for his defense, but he and his teammates held LeBron James to three field goals in a win over the Cavaliers last Saturday night.
Chicago Bulls (1-2) – The defense will be there, but the lack of a go-to guy offensively is the question mark. The Bulls are still trying to find themselves.
Cleveland Cavaliers (2-1) – Larry Hughes' hot start is exactly what Cavs fans wanted to see. He's averaging 19 points on 50-percent shooting.
Dallas Mavericks (0-2) – Finals hangover? The Mavericks are trying to become the first Finals' loser to win a title the following season since Detroit in 1989.
Denver Nuggets (0-2) – J.R. Smith's three-point shooting is a welcome threat for the Denver attack.
Detroit Pistons (2-1) – The new law regarding technical fouls should be labeled "The Rasheed Wallace Rule."
Golden State Warriors (1-2) – Small ball under Don Nelson isn't working yet in the Bay Area.
Houston Rockets (1-2) – Bonzi Wells is still working his way into shape after missing most of training camp.
Indiana Pacers (2-1) – Al Harrington and Jermaine O'Neal, back together again. Not exactly Redford and Newman, but it's not a bad combo.
Los Angeles Clippers (2-1) – Mike Dunleavy is thrilled. His team is 2-1 without playing very well yet. Once Tim Thomas gets in shape, look out.
Los Angeles Lakers (3-1) – Who's that No. 24 guy? He looks just like Kobe Bryant.
Memphis Grizzlies (1-2) – Second-year man Hakim Warrick is taking advantage of his chance with Pau Gasol out of the lineup.
Miami Heat (1-2) – The over/under on Shaquille O'Neal's missed games this season? Eighteen.
Milwaukee Bucks (2-1) – The Bucks are no joke. Andrew Bogut is off to a great start.
Minnesota Timberwolves (2-1) – So much for that Randy Foye for Rookie of the Year talk. Foye is scoreless through three games.
New Jersey Nets (1-1) – Marcus Williams is a potent backup for Jason Kidd.
New Orleans Hornets (3-0) – Chris Paul's line through the first three games: 48 points, 32 assists and eight turnovers.
New York Knicks (1-2) – Jamal Crawford's shooting has been Dick Cheney-esque. He's seven for his first 39.
Orlando Magic (1-2) – Great to see Grant Hill back in uniform and lighting up the scoreboard.
Philadelphia 76ers (3-0) – Kyle Korver is off to a blazing start: 18.7 points a game on 9-for-11 three-point shooting.
Phoenix Suns (1-3) – With Amare Stoudemire trying to find his game and Boris Diaw and Raja Bell struggling, the Suns can't find their groove.
Portland Trail Blazers (2-1) – Zach Randolph is off to a hot start to help the Blazers win two of their first three.
Sacramento Kings (1-2) – Kevin Martin will get plenty of Most Improved Player votes at the end of the season.
San Antonio Spurs (2-1) – Francisco Elson and Fabricio Oberto are giving Tim Duncan plenty of support down low.
Seattle SuperSonics (1-2) – The Sonics won't have any trouble scoring. They're averaging 111.7 points per game so far. But can they stop anyone?
Toronto Raptors (1-2) – T.J. Ford is trying to become the Steve Nash of Canada. Is that blasphemous?
Utah Jazz (3-0) – Carlos Boozer has been dominant, and the Jazz are enjoying great guard play from Deron Williams and Derek Fisher.
Washington Wizards (1-1) – Think Gilbert Arenas was upset about his opening-night stinker against Cleveland? He followed that up with 44 against Boston.
