Life is a hard road, a vale of tears, a dark wind rising, sound and fury, blues coming down like hail. And some days, your team loses in the World Cup! Describing himself as a "broken man" in the aftermath of Portugal's 1-0 loss to Spain, Cristiano Ronaldo has given a moderately amazing interview to the BBC in which the existential horror of the human condition appears to have dawned on him all at once:
"I feel a broken man, completely disconsolate, frustrated and an unimaginable sadness. ... I am a human being and like any human being I suffer and I have the right to suffer alone."
Where once the world was a riot of swimsuit models, all is now isolation and dread. Where once life could be greeted in a pink polo shirt with the collar popped, it can now be faced only through a pair of mirrored sunglasses in whose lenses the philosopher sees nothing but himself.
[Photos: See more of Ronaldo's game reactions]
Ronaldo also used his newfound alienation to explain why he seemed to blame Portugal coach Carlos Queiroz for the loss in the moments after the match.
"When I said put the question [of why we lost] to the coach, it is just because Carlos Queiroz was holding a press conference. I was not in a position to explain what was what."
No one is, Cristiano, not even in a press conference. It's enough to make anyone spit.
[Video: Ronaldo spits rudely after defeat]
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Photo: Getty Images