September 30, 2010
If you've ever watched an Orlando Magic game, then you know Stan Van Gundy is famous for three things — screaming, looking like various rotund Italian-American celebrities, and wearing mock turtlenecks underneath his sport coat. Apparently, this year, he's going to be almost unrecognizable.
Van Gundy will also be sporting some new looks this season -- one by choice, another by mandate.
Both of his creation.
Slightly slimmer and more physically fit, Van Gundy is exercising on the elliptical machine and lifting weights. He's also trying to eat better, he said, and is scheduled to have another checkup in two weeks to find out exactly how much weight he's lost.
"It would be almost physically impossible for it to go up," he said, chuckling.
And those trademark turtleneck shirts complete with the same few sport coats on the sideline are gone. New NBA rules require coaches to wear collared shirts during games.
In an appreciative gesture, Magic CEO Bob Vander Weide -- after extending Van Gundy's contract through 2013 -- even had tailors fit the coach and some front-office members with suits. So, yes, a fully suited Van Gundy is coming to NBA sidelines.
Maybe even sometimes with a tie.
"I want them to at least name the rule after me," Van Gundy said. "Somebody has their Bird rights. Larry Bird got that rule named after him. I want it to be the Van Gundy Rule."
Double upgrade, all the way. Not only is it way better for a human being to be in good shape, being even a bit slimmer is always a good look. Not to mention it might put a stop to all the Ron Jeremy jokes, though I feel there may be no looking back at this point. And though it'll be weird to see Stan Van Gundy in collared shirts, those mock turtlenecks needed to go. In the early '90s. Thanks for setting SVG straight, NBA.
At the very least, since Van Gundy has had his favorite shirts taken from him, the least we can do is call this the Van Gundy Rule. That's not too much to ask, I don't think, considering Trent Tucker has his own rule. Of course, if the NBA eventually mandates that coaches can't have mustaches, then we may need to reevaluate the name, though I suppose the D'Antoni Rule would suffice.