Zlatan Ibrahimovic made his defiant return to Ligue 1 following his two-match ban for kicking a goalkeeper in the chest and he promptly scored two goals and set up two others in PSG's 4-0 win against Troyes. Of course, being the best player in France causes one to develop a mighty thirst and when Zlatan attempted to satisfying that thirst with a drink of water, the Craziest Man in the World attempted to take it from him mid-sip.
The man seemed to be defending a bottle of water that didn't belong to Zlatan, but what he clearly didn't know is that all water belongs to Zlatan. This brazen fool was lucky though. Since Zlatan is fresh off his ban, he didn't decapitate him with a bicycle kick. Instead, Zlatan shot him a death glare normally reserved for pictures of Pep Guardiola.
No one has ever been luckier than this man in this moment.
Previously: Zlatan Ibrahimovic drinks Joe Hart's water
Video via @murphnd @PhilippeAuclair and @erikbielderman