The best (worst?) Jersey Fouls are the ones that make you wince at the same time you begrudgingly acknowledge some level of twisted genius at work.
Take this one from a Chicago Blackhawks game, via Kelly Twomey.
Is it a cry for attention? A willful waste of money in a tough economy? A baffling decision given the plethora of jersey options for the franchise? Yes on all counts. But is it also … well, a smart-ass clever play on words? Indeed, we say through a shrug.
So the best (worst?) Fouls of 2012 follow in this tradition. Well, some of them do. Others will bludgeon your brain like a sledgehammer of stupid.
Here are the 10 Jersey Fouls of the year that will live on in infamy.
And here ... we ... go.
10. The Black Guy
In case you haven’t figured it out yet from the Banana Incident and Racist Czech Chants Incident, Wayne Simmonds is a black guy. And on the off chance you haven’t figured it out yet, this Philadelphia Flyers fan presents a message on race that has all the subtlety of a Tarantino film. (s/t Tatum Biggs)
9. Your Obligatory ‘69’ Jersey
The ‘69’ sweater is a wart on the backside that are Jersey Fouls, but we always feel the need to feature at least one in the year-end roundup. This Tampa Bay Lightning jersey was the most referenced Sixty-Niner of the year, with its crass reference and the notion that the Fouler loves MUF so much, he’s willing to capture it with his digital video recorder. (s/t Scott Sages)
8. Johnny Oduya Porn
While every hockey fan at some point has inserted Chicago Blackhawks defenseman Johnny Oduya’s name into the classic Franz Ferdinand song “Do You Wanna?”, this Foul from a Winnipeg Jets fan brings his name into full sexual innuendo territory – as well as advertising. (s/t Abdullah Bitar)
7. The Cammalleri Protest Foul
Mike Cammalleri left the Montreal Canadiens on bitter terms, and apparently at least one fan thought the return from the Calgary Flames was sufficient. No, Rene Bourque doesn’t wear No. 13, but hey: The price of a magic marker on bare skin far outweighs that of a new sweater, right? (s/t JT Utah)
6. Tim Tebow Foul
Greg Gelz created this jersey out of duct tape hoping to mock NY Jets fans after their team signed Tim Tebow, and wore it to a New York Rangers game at MSG. Total Foul, but we imagine he’s still relishing that last laugh he had over the signing.
5. Brad Doty
Our favorite Foul from the Los Angeles Kings’ Cup run, as it managed to troll local media for its confusing between the NHL and NBA Kings and that mangling of Drew Doughty’s name (BRAD DOTY?!) by that Fox 11 anchor. (s/t The Mayor)
4. Forsberg Fouls (tie)
Rather inexplicably, two of our most memorable Fouls featured Peter Forsberg Colorado Avalanche jerseys. The first was this welcome mat for Peyton Manning to wipe his cleats on (s/t the late, much-missed Jessica Redfield)…
… and the other, well, perfectly explained the aftermath from watching Forsberg deke through the defense for a highlight-reel goal. (s/t Burke)
3. The Canucks Bite Foul
This is in reference to the infamous Alex Burrows bite on Patrice Bergeron in Game 1 of the 2011 Stanley Cup Final, followed by the hilarious Maxim Lapierre mockery that occurred in Game 2. We have no idea why anyone would will this into existence. But we’re strangely happy that it does. (s/t Erin S.)
2. Grant Clitsome
This Columbus Blue Jackets fan is wearing a jersey that reads “Cha Cha”. It has the No. 14 on it. At the time, the player who had that number was the infamously monikered Grant Clitsome. Connect the dots, la la la la, connect the dots, la la la la … (s/t Matt S.)
1. The Single Worst Kings Jersey Every Witnessed
DJ Spahr explains what the hell this is:
"While at Frozen Fury in Vegas, I saw this… Nothing says "NHL" like a cropped, slim-fit, short-sleeved Gretzky jersey on a dude. WTF?!"
It’s been roughly 11 months since we featured this jersey. We still don’t have an answer to that last question.