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Roberto Luongo breaks his silence: seven things we learned

Roberto Luongo has finally broken his silence, and if you're wondering why he waited so long to speak, we finally have our answer. No, we weren't waiting on him to compose himself, so as to avoid another emotional "my contract sucks" moment. We were just waiting for James Duthie's summer vacation to end, because he only speaks to James Duthie now. Is your name James Duthie? No? Then quit. Just quit.

On Friday morning, TSN aired part 1 of Duthie's exclusive, long-awaited sitdown with Luongo (which they split into two parts -- thanks for that), and while there wasn't much in the way of new information, there was some. If you missed it, or you live in America, where the momentous viewing event was unavailable to you, in honour of his seven-week silence, here are seven things we learned:

1 | Luongo plans to honour his contract

Right off the hop, Luongo was asked if he plans to honour his contract in Vancouver.

"Yeah, no doubt," he said. "I have a contract. I plan to honour it. There's a lot at stake for me this year. First and foremost I want to re-establish myself as one of the top goalies in the league."

At Duthie's prompting, Luongo likened the whole situation to a divorce, admitting that he had "moved on", so to speak. "The only problem is she... wanted me back," he said, chuckling. I would beg to differ there. Another problem, as I see it, is that he wasn't allowed to get divorced.

He should have started his own church. It worked for Henry VIII.

2 | When Francesco Aquilini's at your house, he controls the television

Later in the interview, Luongo described the events of draft day, with Canucks owner Francesco Aquilini arriving at his house only moments before Luongo watched Gary Bettman announce the deal on television.

"He sits on my couch and he asks me to turn the TV off."

Gutsy move.

3 | Luongo "blacked out", which isn't a slang term for listening to your old Blackstreet CDs

Asked what he said to Aquilini in that moment, Luongo responded, "I don't remember. I just kind of blacked out after that."

Thank goodness he sprung for that fainting couch from the set of Mad Men.

4 | Luongo "explored every possibility" in regards to getting out of dodge (dodge in this case being Vancouver)

That means, at some point, he investigated faking his own death, and that's awesome.

5 | Luongo never actually turned down a trade

"I never turned down a trade," Luongo said, contrary to several reports that he had nixed a move that would have sent him to Toronto.

"What happened was... one or two days before last year's draft, Mike [Gillis] just told me was there was two or three teams that are interested... and all I said to Mike was, 'Mike, if you can, if you could try to do something with either Florida or Tampa, I would appreciate that. And if it doesn't work out, then we'll... move on.' I think that was the gist of it. I never turned a trade... there was never a trade on the table that I turned down."

6 | On trade deadline day, he cried

Remember when Luongo met the media on trade deadline day, having just learned that he wasn't going to be traded, and he looked like he'd been crying? That's because he was crying.

"I might have cried in front of another man," he said.

Awkward! According to gender constructs, men are supposed to be uncomfortable with that.

7 | Luongo is 100% committed to Vancouver

Asked if he still wanted to be traded, Luongo dodged the question somewhat, saying "I don't have a crystal ball. I don't know what's going to happen down the road."

But if you're a Canucks fan, you can ignore that part, because the next part is more affirming.

"Where I am, I'm gonna be 100% committed to that place. Right now I'm in Vancouver. I'm 100% committed to that."

Good news, everyone! The nightmare is over!