Hakeem Olajuwon wants to sell you some jeans

We don't come to mock. Hakeem Olajuwon will not be mocked, even if he is modeling jeans while lounging around a car designed by the Europe's most prolific mass murderer.

The man leaning up against that Volkswagen Beetle wants to sell you some jeans. He's designed them himself, along with several types of polo shirts, shorts and tees. And far be it for us to get in his way. Hakeem may have lost a little of your respect by going to play for the Toronto Raptors 10 years ago, but he should lose your respect in this decade merely by trying to sell jeans whilst leaning up against a Volkswagen Beetle.

Dream again, friends. Or, as Hakeem would like to put it, "DR34M" again. This is how fashionistas spell.