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Ball Don't Lie

Create-a-Caption: Descending levels of Trail Blazer fury faces

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The dream of last season's not alive in Portland. (AP)

Pretty reasonable left-to-right downward slope. If this was a PowerPoint presentation, you'd get the point — our profits are down. If you move to the right of Nicolas Batum, you have utter indifference, which is what the Portland Trail Blazers will likely feel this offseason, as they will be in a weird, in-between limbo state that does not involve postseason work. Weird times.

Best caption wins a pretty good song by the Faces, irrespective of which soundtrack this YouTube clip comes from. Good luck.

In our last adventure: Hustling for the ball, hitting the deck, calling a heady timeout, playing the right way — that's the J.R. Smith none of us know!

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J.R. Smith calls timeout. (Getty Images)

Winner, Russell S: "Vandelay Industries! Say Vandelay Industries!"

Runner-up, The Devil: J.R. Smith demonstrates the one game situation in which he wouldn't consider shooting the ball.

Second runner-up, Jason: "NOBODY MOVE! I dropped another 3-pointer."

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