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C-a-C Past Lives: Tony Parker hates All-Star Weekend photo shoots

Gotta get back in time ... Welcome to another edition of Create-a-Caption Past Lives. Don't remember what they are? Then go check out the first one for a reminder, ya turkey!

Back in 2002, Tony Parker wasn't a suave, debonair man who bedded down housewives, desperate or otherwise, and made international paper shilling for French food delivery companies or French Axe body spray. He was just a 20-year-old kid who thought that sticking your tongue out when someone was taking a photo of you was a really good idea. He was wrong.

Cervantes once wrote, "The pen is the tongue of the mind." The first line of the story that Tony Parker is writing with his mindpen is clearly, "I am kind of gross." Oh, well. At least there's no food in there, I guess.

Best caption wins me taking a break from saying, writing and thinking about the word "tongue," which has started to really gross me out. Good luck.

In our last adventure: I know you want to be Captain New York, Carmelo Anthony, but that's not what Vado means when he talks about slime.

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Winner, Kd: If the leaked photos are accurate, this year's version of the New York Knicks' St. Patrick's Day uniforms will be atrocious.

Runner-up, HuffyTheGreat: "Someday we'll find it,

the playoff connection,

the dreamers, Amar'e and me!"

Second runner-up, Jones6: "Little do they know that this nuclear fallout will give me defensive super powers."