Wisconsin's Isaiah Mullens once had thoughts of suicide. Now, living his best life, he shares his story to help others
MADISON – Isaiah Mullens successfully played the stereotypical role of the hulking male athlete for many years.
Injured on the football field?
No worries. Mullens would try to play through the pain.
Despondent after being teased by his classmates back in Ohio because some of his instruction took place in a special room?
No worries. Mullens internalized that pain, too.
Struggling to help lead the way for his mother and younger brother because his father wasn’t around much?
No worries. Mullens was determined to bear that emotional burden alone as well.
Meeting Brianna Beilfuss at Wisconsin helped change the course of Isaiah Mullens' life journey
“I was never really a person who opened up about my struggles,” said Mullens, a sixth-year senior defensive lineman for Wisconsin. “My wife, she is the one who really pushed me to open up and go to therapy.”
Mullens is preparing for his final college season and working on a master’s degree. Last month, he married Brianna Beilfuss, whom he met at UW. She recently started working as a nurse. They are expecting a girl in early January.
“She puts stress on her to keep some stress off me,” Mullens said, “which I wish she wouldn’t do. But she does.
“We have a lot to balance, a lot to work on. It is a lot to have to deal with. But at the same time, if you have an amazing person who is willing to sacrifice for you, it makes it a little bit easier.”
Mullens and Beilfuss dated for about 2½ years. Mullens was able to open up to her, sharing the frustration he felt on and off the field. He shared the pain from his childhood in Ohio. She convinced Mullens, 6-foot-4 and 298 pounds, that being vulnerable is OK and that he should see a counselor. Mullens listened and worked with Bjorn Hanson, a psychologist at UW.
That led to Mullens sharing his journey in a story posted on May 9 on UW's football site and then expanding on that story earlier this month during media day.
“She made me realize it is OK to talk about your problems,” Mullens said of his wife. “It was very hard for me. I’m in a lot better place now.”
And when he was in a darker place? Mullens shared that he contemplated suicide.
Safety Travian Blaylock, a sixth-year senior who is perhaps Mullen’s closest friend on the team, was stunned when he first learned his teammate had those thoughts.
“Brutal,” Blaylock said. “Brutal. It is sad to see. …He talks to me about all that stuff, man. We’re really close. Came in together as true freshmen.
“We have a connection, unlike any that I have with anybody else on the team. I’ve known the guy for six years now. It has been great getting to know him and being able to share those vulnerable moments with each other.
“He has been real open with me even before he was open with you all. This was like years in the making and I try to help him.”
Defensive end Rodas Johnson, a fifth-year senior, offered Mullens a strong message.
“I’m kind of cutthroat about things,” Johnson said. "But I told him that first of all I’m glad he is here. Two, I’m a big believer in faith. And sometimes people just take on too much. He doesn’t have to.
“He has a room full of friends as far as the D-line and he has a locker room full of teammates. Whatever we can do to help him…we can help you as long as you open up and you are willing to be vulnerable.”
Mullens knows that now.
"They never expected it," Mullens said, referring to his teammates. "I didn’t want to (talk) and I should have."
Safety Travian Blaylock, Isaiah Mullens' friend and confidant, willingly offers advice about parenting, life
Blaylock is married and has two children, a 4-year-old son and a 1-year-old daughter.
Newly married and knowing his first child is due in a few months, Mullens has gone to Blaylock for advice.
Help!
“I really appreciate and love him for that,” Mullens said. “He has been through a lot. He is just a strong dude. I’m inspired by him, by seeing what he has done and how he has handled the situation. I’m blessed to have a great friend like him.
“He was adamant about your faith. Having a relationship with Jesus Christ is an extremely important thing. Taking your family to church and raising them to have those values as a human being, be good to the world and be loving and caring.”
When Mullens first arrived at UW in 2018, he appeared quiet and introverted when dealing with reporters. He didn’t seem comfortable doing interviews until sometime during the 2021 season, when he became a starter, and even more last season.
Some college athletes love bantering with reporters and do so from Day 1. Others aren't as comfortable. Some prefer to keep their thoughts private. Some simply prefer to talk about their teammates rather than themselves.
In retrospect, Mullens' lack of comfort was linked to his off-field issues. So why did he decide to share his journey now?
“It wasn’t to make myself look good,” Mullens said. “I’m pretty sure people might think that. But I wanted to help, to inspire people and tell people it is OK to not be OK.
“No matter who you are. It can be LeBron James or a freshman that just got here.
“I don’t want praise. I just want people to get help.”
Editor’s note: If you or someone you know may be struggling with suicidal thoughts, you can call the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline any time or chat online. The Crisis Text Line also provides free, 24/7, confidential support via text message to people in crisis when they dial 741741.
This article originally appeared on Milwaukee Journal Sentinel: Seeking help led Wisconsin's Isaiah Mullens to a better life
