The seven funniest things SEC football has given us this season | Goodbread

This week's notes column takes a look at the seven funniest things about SEC football from the first eight weeks of the 2023 season, and we go around the SEC for a few other items on this week's schedule:

1 - Shane Beamer's broken foot

How funny was South Carolina coach Shane Beamer breaking his foot on a Gatorade cooler after the Gamecocks blew a lead in a 41-39 loss to Florida. Even his AD laughed. Credit for staying on brand: Beamer chose to kick the official sports drink of the SEC. He could've broken his foot on anything: a bench, a wall, a chair. At least this way, he generated some consumer-targeted impressions for a key sponsor. It just means more, right?

2 - Jimbo Fisher, the real 12th man

The Texas A&M coach standing five yards in bounds while an Auburn defender bolts between Fisher and the sideline with a fumble return. It's not unusual for coaches, especially head coaches, to creep a yard or two into the field of play, and officials let them get away with it. When the action comes straight at them, however, they generally have the awareness to get off the field. Fisher's excuse? He thought the play was dead. "I was trying to get (QB) Max (Johnson's) attention on something and then he kind of well, I mean, you do it in practice all the time, they run by you." Remarkably, no flag was thrown.

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3 - Ole Miss security guard takes on field-stormers

If you've ever wondered what an overweight offensive guard would look like trying to pass block against an endless stream of linebackers blitzing through both of his gaps, a viral video from the field-storming after Ole Miss' win over LSU provided it. The Ole Miss security guard even decked a female field stormer with an elbow to the head/neck area, the textbook definition of targeting. Elsewhere at Vaught-Hemingway Stadium, the SEC-mandated evacuation plan to quickly get visiting players to the tunnel during a field storming went into full effect, and even helped separate a brief skirmish between an LSU player and a Rebels fan. But this guy apparently wrote his own marching orders, because the only thing he evacuated was common sense.

4 - Official-account social media wars

Official social media accounts of SEC schools trolling their opponents? Yes, more please. The Ole Miss X account came up with a pretty hard takedown of Auburn after knocking off the Tigers. And when it comes to school-on-school sarcasm, no matter which schools are involved, I'm here for it. The SEC should just go ahead and sanction this as a sport. We could have scoreboards, weekly standings, even a conference championship game in which the most savage trolling wins a trophy. Speaking of Ole Miss, we can call it the Lane Kiffin Award.

5 - Former Arkansas OC Dan Enos emailing angry fans

Arkansas offensive coordinator Dan Enos, now fired after the wheels came off the Razorbacks' offense in October, found time to respond to emails from angry fans. That was about four weeks ago. In three games since, the Razorbacks couldn't crack 300 yards in total offense, and managed 200 in Saturday's 7-3 boat race of a loss to Mississippi State. Offense was supposed to be this team's strong suit with one of the SEC's best QB-RB tandems in KJ Jefferson and Rocket Sanders. Forget the inbox, Dan. At least now, you meet them behind the gym after school.

6 - LSU stretching at a car dealership en route to MSU

I hate buying cars. You hate buying cars. We all hate buying cars. You can't step on a car lot without a pushy pitch man pouncing on you like a blitzing linebacker. Well, how about some real linebackers? The LSU football team went through some stretching and ran some quick substitution drills at a car dealership a few hours before its road game at Mississippi State. The reason? Players were up so early to make the trip for an 11 a.m. kickoff, coach Brian Kelly didn't want them falling asleep on the team bus. Per Google, there are 52 Starbucks locations in Mississippi, coach.

7 - Zach Arnett and hot mics

Mississippi State coach Zach Arnett dropped a quiet-but-audible F-bomb after mistakenly being handed halftime stats for a post-game press conference following a 40-17 loss to Alabama. This just a few weeks after he dropped one live on SEC Network, after a win over Arizona. Idea for MSU AD Zac Selmon: swear jar that offsets the buyout.

Alabama's grind? All mental

After eight consecutive weeks of action, you can bet an idle week is welcome for any college football team, and Alabama coach Nick Saban made note of that following the Crimson Tide's 34-20 win over Tennessee. In Alabama's case, however, it sounds like the break is needed more for the mental grind than the physical. This from Saban on Monday about the program's analytics on physical fatigue: "We only have one player on our team, who is down like 2.9% (from preseason). Everybody else is at least at that level. So they may think they're tired, but it's probably more psychological."

Around the SEC

In the wake of allegations that Michigan violated NCAA rules by sending a staffer to the games of upcoming opponents to steal signs, multiple SEC coaches advocated for the allowance of a helmet microphone that would allow some direct pre-snap communication between coaches and quarterbacks (as well as a defensive signal-caller). It's a system used in the NFL, and it's overdue in college. Enough with these ridiculous picture cards and whatnot for signaling. ... Georgia gets its first test without superstar TE Brock Bowers against archrival Florida on Saturday in Jacksonville. And if UF's defensive game plan is at all successful, you can bet it will be borrowed from in the ensuing weeks. ... If you can't get to sleep Saturday night, find a replay of Mississippi State's game at Auburn. Ten minutes watching those offenses, and you'll be out cold. ... The Goodspread SEC Pick of the Week finally faltered in Week 8 when Alabama LB Jihaad Campbell cracked the over-under (49) with a fumble return for a touchdown to finish the Crimson Tide's 34-20 win over Tennessee. This week, we're rolling with another under: Texas A&M-South Carolina (under 54.5). Season: 6-1-1. All-time: 16-4-1.

Tuscaloosa News columnist Chase Goodbread is also the weekly co-host of Crimson Cover TV on WVUA-23 and the Talkin' Tide podcast. Reach him at cgoodbread@gannett.com. Follow on Twitter @chasegoodbread.

This article originally appeared on The Tuscaloosa News: From hot mics to cold trolls: SEC football's 7 funniest 2023 moments