Collette V. Smith, first Black woman to coach in NFL, talks education, abuse and survival

Collette V. Smith is on the move.

The first Black woman to coach in the NFL took a break from her duties as keynote speaker at the NAF Next education conference in Phoenix to give an impromptu clinic on how to track footballs like a pro.

She crouched into a defensive stance — wearing a power skirt with high heels — and demonstrated how to simultaneously watch a quarterback and track a wide receiver, like a pit bull playing fetch.

“He’s natural,” she said. “I had to learn how to be natural.”

Smith is out of football, but it’s hard to imagine why. She’s a motivator who projects a supreme self-confidence that belies how she gained it: Collette V. Smith is a fighter who hit rock bottom so many times, she stopped counting.

“I’m a survivor,” she said. “I am a five-time rape survivor. I am a molestation survivor. Then I started dating men who didn’t treat me the right way because I didn’t love me, anymore. I didn’t love myself. Then I became a suicide survivor, a several-time suicide survivor … One day, I just woke up and was like, ‘No more. No more. I’m a strong person. I’m not settling anymore.’ It was the power of God and the power of belief.”

'I'm all over the place ... They need us'

Smith wants to infuse everyone who needs it with the divine energy she’s tapped into, so she connects with causes she cares about as a motivational speaker.

She’s gone from coaching the Jets, to crisscrossing the country on them.

“You might call me and I’m in KC today,” she said. “Next week? I’m in Compton. I’m in DC. I’m all over the place. Our marginalized children need us. They need a lift.”

She’s trying to help improve education, advance voting rights, end human trafficking, get clean drinking water to rural Africa, fight Alzheimer’s, save dogs, expand women’s sports and end domestic violence.

It’s like she’s trying to make up for lost time.

“I felt like there was something taken away from me,” she said. “And I’m fighting to get it back every day.”

'The 'V' is for 'victory'

NAF is doing important work. Public schools around the nation are in varying degrees of disarray, depending upon whom you ask. There are success stories, but too often poor kids, especially children of color, are getting left behind, trapped in a cycle of hopelessness that undermines the American dream. It’s hard to pull yourself up by your own bootstraps if no one teaches you how to tie your shoes — or read.

Public schools are also in the crossfire of a senseless, political culture war over critical race theory, curriculum that could be the key to helping more people understand how a legacy of racist housing policies and hiring practices has today clustered millions of minorities into densely populated neighborhoods with failing schools for people who need education the most.

NAF sets up academies within public schools to teach job skills to promising students, giving them a boost into the workforce, regardless of whether they attend college.

The Phoenix conference at the JW Marriott Desert Ridge Resort and Spa was a professional development workshop for educators, funded largely by corporate donations from employers who want to make sure they have a pipeline to diverse talent.

The setting was no mistake. It’s hard to inspire hope in others if you don’t have it for yourself. A couple of days at a five-star resort can help charge the batteries of teachers depleted by low pay in crumbling schools. So can a pep talk from Collette V. Smith. (“The ‘V’ is for ‘victory,’” she said. “My mama will tell you it’s for ‘Veronica.’”)

“Education is the pinnacle of life and what we need ... As a Black woman who grew up in a marginalized community, I know I didn’t get the greatest education from my public schools,” she said. “But I also know that there were some outstanding teachers that I’ll never forget, and the education that they have given me is everything. And I want that for our children.”

That means her goal is to teach teachers how to pick themselves up when they fall, a skill she learned the hard way.

'It's game on, baby! It's game on!'

Smith has talked about her past before, including a descent into depression after being ignored when she told loved ones she had been raped by a family member.

“Domestic violence is easy for me to talk about now,” she said. “But it’s hard because the world doesn’t want to hear it. You’d be surprised how many people don’t want you to bring up domestic violence. Unfortunately, it’s too prevalent. Too many women and men have faced it in some capacity. But I feel that talking about it sets us free. It did that for me.

“I have a blueprint of what worked for me in my life, and I want to share that with other people.”

She believes her method can work for anyone.

'Get up! Get up!'

It starts with faith.

“Jeremiah 29:11,” she said.

The Bible verse reads: “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord. ‘Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’”

It gives her a sense of purpose, of knowing that she can use what she’s been through.

“The reason is for me to uplift other people and to know just how strong I am,” she said. “The destiny in me is greater than the storm around me. … I need to share that.”

From there, it’s about building confidence.

“Comparing myself to other people might be something that could destroy me … Once I overcome that,” she said, her energy lifting, “It’s game on, baby! It’s game on!”

The final step involves relentless positive thinking.

“I would work out,” she said. “I was grinding hard … working out in the mirror, talking to myself. ‘You can do this. You got this. Get up, girl. You are strong. Get up, girl. You are worthy. Get up, girl. No one can do it like you. Get up, girl. You are Collette V. Smith. C’mon, whatcha waiting on? Get up, girl. Get up! Get up!’”

'My calling is to inspire'

She’s determined to make the most of every day. No more wasting time feeling sorry for herself. It’s never too late. She started playing pro football as a safety for the NY Sharks at the age of 42. A few years later, she was coaching defensive backs for the Jets. Now, in her mid-50s, she runs a non-profit, Believe In U, aimed at empowering women, and she connects with organizations such as NAF.

Still, it’s hard to understand why she doesn’t have a job in football, not that she’s ruling it out.

“It was one of the greatest times of my life,” she said. “I don’t know (if I’m done coaching.) My calling is to inspire, and I’m using my platform that God gave me to empower the marginalized.”

A conversation with her feels like an impromptu life skills clinic.

If she seems like a pit bull, it’s because she’s become one.

Reach Moore at gmoore@azcentral.com or 602-444-2236. Follow him on Twitter @SayingMoore.

This article originally appeared on Arizona Republic: Collette V. Smith, NFL's first Black woman coach, is abuse survivor