The matches to watch after you realize new Liverpool owner John Henry already has an effective way to keep the journos at bay.
Arsenal v Birmingham at Emirates Stadium -- Arsene Wenger admits he tells lies sometimes to protect a player. Is this news?
Fulham v Spurs at Craven Cottage -- There are only two unbeaten teams in the Premier League. Man United and Fulham. Fulham also have six draws in seven matches.
Aston Villa v Chelsea at Villa Park -- New Villa manager Gerard Houllier says Emile Heskey is as good as Didier Drogba, but he just doesn't use his attributes to his advantage. And at no point in saying this did he start laughing or shoot chocolate milk from his nose. That's impressive. Come on, Chels!!
Barcelona v Valencia at Camp Nou -- Xavi and David Villa are doubtful for this one. Which is a shame because Villa won't be able to go against his former club. It's also amazing that Pep Guardiola wasn't able to use his magic to instantly heal them.
AC Milan v Chievo Verona -- Robinho says he would never protest against being bench. Of course not. He only protests when his team won't sell him.
Bayern Munich v Hannover 96 at Allianz Arena -- Hannover are off to a surprisingly good start and Bayern are off to a surprisingly bad start. Who will win?!
After the jump, Sunday's matches and our expectedly unexpected video...
Everton v Liverpool at Goodison Park -- the Merseyside Derby that everyone is talking about for reasons barely related to actual football. Henry and his NESV partners won't be in attendance because they feel their first match should be at home. Meanwhile, Tom Hicks will be doing absolutely anything other than watching this.
Sampdoria v Fiorentina at Stadio Luigi Ferraris -- Artur is still saying that he's leaving Fiorentina in January if he doesn't start playing. This could put him one match closer to that end. And one match closer to throwing a feral cat at Sebastien Frey.
Guarani v Corinthians at Brinco de Ouro -- Fat Ronaldo makes his long-awaited return to the pitch. Even though he hasn't played in quite some time and is nowhere near his best shape, he'll probably still score. If not, expect more smoke bombs.
That'll do it. Enjoy the matches. Like Arsene Wenger, I would lie for all of you.
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