Dose: Pizza and Punishment

Holy cow, Internet people, the 2015-16 season is upon us.

Yeah, that was kind of weak, but do I need to rile you up? It’s hockey. You don’t need me risking my limbs with fireworks to make it more exciting, do you?

Let’s get started on the now-Daily Doses. Hurray.

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SHARKS 5, KINGS 1

-- The Los Angeles Kings probably lost some fans this off-season with off-the-ice stuff. They didn't really come off as a swell bunch last night, either. Dustin Brown delivered ANOTHER really questionable hit, and Milan Lucic made a terrible first impression with the way he reacted to Logan Couture walloped him.

-- Speaking of Lucic, he didn't score a point, went -2 and delivered five hits.

Obviously not good. I'd imagine that he'll avoid an "automatic" suspension for a match penalty, another one of those NHL things that are total jokes (in that they seem to only happen to David Clarkson).

Still, he should be fine. We all knew he was a knucklehead anyway, right?

-- Brent Burns scored a goal and an assist and apparently had two slices of pizza for his troubles. His beard is even mangier that it was before.

-- That Joe Thornton goal was astounding. He shot so assertively! I don't normally use exclamation points, but Thornton shot!

-- Martin Jones looked solid enough, though he wasn't particularly busy (19 out of 20 saves). I think he's a pretty good pick considering his generally low status in rankings and the seemingly solid team in front of him.

-- Don't forget that the Sharks beat the Kings 4-0 last season, started pretty hot and then sputtered out. It's just one game.

CANUCKS 5, FLAMES 1

-- Just one game aside, I think this contest might help to steer opinions back closer to the truth for both teams.

In my opinion, people were a little too up on the Flames and too down on the Canucks.

It's not to say Calgary's awful; the Flames' future is especially bright. Conversely, the Canucks aren't as bad as some will say.

It wouldn't surprise me one bit if the two squads are more or less in the same bubble area again this season.

-- Speaking of things people easily forget, the Sedin twins are still good. They're not exciting-good, but still productive. Just saying.

-- Just a reminder: I'm not saying invest heavily in Vancouver. I just think they'll be mediocre rather than terrible.

-- Ryan Miller might just be the poster child for being tepid yet not awful.

-- The Flames' goalies are truly horrific, though. Jonas Hiller has to be embarrassed to be the backup, or at least not get the Game 1 nod.

-- Death, taxes and the Jiri Hudler - Johnny Gaudreau - Sean Monahan creating a goal per game.

CANADIENS 3, MAPLE LEAFS 1

-- Great game for the Habs’ big three.

Max Pacioretty scored the first goal of the 2015-16 season and then iced the game with an empty-netter (gotta love those, especially when they earn two players an assist like that one did).

Speaking of helpers, P.K. Subban grabbed an apple on all three Montreal goals, including two primary ones.

Finally, Carey Price stopped 36 out of 37 shots.

-- As that SOG total implies, Toronto played well, arguably better than Montreal. Mike Babcock's influence may not make a big fantasy impact, although life could be a little easier for Jonathan Bernier and/or James Reimer.

-- Alex Galchenyuk scored the GWG. Is it just a matter of time before he turns Montreal's top group into a Fantastic Four?

-- Tyler Bozak was among the ice time leaders, something James Mirtle believes will not be the case each night.

RANGERS 3, BLACKHAWKS 2

-- Don't come here for hot takes on disallowed goals and whatnot. Patrick Kane getting robbed of a goal is probably best for the universe, though.

-- Speaking of Kane, he collected an assist and five SOG.

-- His linemate on Wednesday, Artemi Panarin, looked awfully spry in his own right. All of the Panera Bread puns are just gravy (artisanal gravy?).

-- Panarin generated his first career goal, and so did Oscar Lindberg. These are two organizations that really have a knack for development and/or identifying hidden gems.

-- Kinda doubt Trevor Daley's anything to be even mildly excited about.

-- Kevin Klein will probably struggle to hit nine goals again like last season, but he went 1-for-1 on SOG last night.

-- Teuvo Teravainen might just be the guy who makes big gains with all of those losses for Chicago. If you ask me, he really just needs the opportunity.