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Evan Longoria makes three great plays, mistakenly compares self to Ron Burgundy

David Brown
Big League Stew

Not only was Evan Longoria of the Tampa Bay Rays out of his mind playing third base Tuesday, he said he also was out of his body.

Longoria made three outstanding defensive plays of varying difficulty against the Baltimore Orioles, including a spectacular dive to his left in the fifth inning to rob speedy Adam Jones that also required a roll and a throw from his rear — all in one motion.

[Also: Texas Rangers' Yu Darvish falls one out short of a perfect game]

Longoria also made two other athletic plays, both similar-looking dives and throws — appearing to knock down the ball both times before picking it up and firing — to get the speedy Brian Roberts in the fourth and the less-speedy Matt Wieters in the ninth.

The Orioles won 7-4 thanks to a big seventh inning against Tampa Bay's bullpen, but Longoria's plays kept the Rays in the game. And his own performance got Longoria thinking in existential terms:

I've seen the film "Anchorman" one or two dozen times, but I'm not sure what Longoria is getting at.

Update: A few readers have noted that Longo might be confusing "Anchorman" with another Will Ferrell vehicle, "Old School."

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(USA Today)

Because, if he's channeling Burgundy, it would mean that Tropicana Field was "like a glass case of emotion" for him because he was making all of these superhuman plays. Or he was referring to Burgundy's propensity to "zone out"and read whatever is written on the teleprompter. Maybe he had to stop himself from picking up one of the balls and punting it, like the mean biker punted Baxter. Also, did you know the Germans discovered Tampa Bay and name it for a "Whale's Vagina"?

I just haven't seen "Old School" enough, or recently enough, to know what the heck Longoria is saying here. "Frank the Tank" passing out drunk is the best I got.

(Update II: This might be the scene in "Old School" to which Longo refers. Thanks, @efraser77. We good now?)

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(USA Today)

No matter which Will Ferrell movie Longoria found himself in, he was making his own art at third base on opening day at the Trop. Thank you, little baby Longoria Jesus!

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