MLB Power Rankings: Rangers, Giants, Nats all chasing Cubs
Derek Jeter is getting married, apparently. We’re not invited to the wedding. It seems only right to send along a gift, however, given his years of service to the game. MLB franchises probably are thinking the same, and are wondering what to get the man about to add a ring, his sixth. We’re here to help:
The rankings (records through Wednesday):
1. Chicago Cubs (47-23; Previous: 1) – Towel set monogrammed Mr. November and Mrs. November.
2. Texas Rangers (47-26; Previous: 4) – Set of “Just Hitched” cowboy boot bottle openers.
3. San Francisco Giants (46-27; Previous: 5) – Could think of nothing, but will be very generous during dollar dance.
4. Washington Nationals (43-30; Previous: 2) – A few dead Presidents to be put toward the honeymoon.
5. Cleveland Indians (41-30; Previous: 8) – One large, slightly used bass drum.
6. Baltimore Orioles (41-30; Previous: 3) – Nesting bowls. Cuz they’re the Orioles.
7. Boston Red Sox (39-32; Previous: 6) – Barbecue apron inscribed “True Yankee.”
8. Los Angeles Dodgers (41-33; Previous: 12) – Something blue.
9. Toronto Blue Jays (40-34; Previous: 13) – Something to remember them by from his years in the AL East – a nice doormat.
10. Kansas City Royals (38-33; Previous: 15) – A coffee maker for those long nights editing Matt Harvey's copy.
11. New York Mets (38-32; Previous: 10) – Hmmm, Supermodel of the Month Club? No …
12. St. Louis Cardinals (38-33; Previous: 11) – A photo of the happy couple, taken from a hundred yards out, a little blurry, but that’s almost surely him and could be her left arm.
13. Miami Marlins (38-34; Previous: 17) – Miniature replica home run thingy. You know, for the wedding night.
14. Houston Astros (37-36; Previous: 20) – Andy Pettitte, 2004-06.
15. Detroit Tigers (37-35; Previous: 14) – Still have that scholarship waiting in Ann Arbor.
16. Seattle Mariners (36-36; Previous: 7) – A Netgear EX2700, top of the line in range extenders.
17. New York Yankees (35-36; Previous: 18) – Paid for the rehearsal dinner.
18. Chicago White Sox (36-36; Previous: 16) – A gift basket and a ride home.
19. Pittsburgh Pirates (34-38; Previous: 9) – Cashmere (jump) throw.
20. Colorado Rockies (34-37; Previous: 23) – Fondue pot. Hey, it was on the list.
21. Arizona Diamondbacks (34-40; Previous: 25) – The infield at normal depth – Nov. 4, 2001.
22. Tampa Bay Rays (31-39; Previous: 19) – A variance to go two feet higher on St. Jetersburg wall. Can’t be too careful.
23. Milwaukee Brewers (32-40; Previous: 21) – Bud Selig-autographed cheeseboard.
24. Los Angeles Angels (31-41; Previous: 24) – “Rally Monkey crossing” refrigerator magnet set. So fun.
25. San Diego Padres (30-43; Previous: 27) – Fondue pot for two, just to make the Rockies look bad.
26. Philadelphia Phillies (30-43; Previous: 22) – Cookware. Teflon, naturally.
27. Oakland Athletics (29-42; Previous: 26) – Jeremy Giambi, coming in standing.
28. Cincinnati Reds (28-44; Previous: 28) – A framed photo of the ’92 draft. Jeter went sixth. Reds picked fifth.
29. Atlanta Braves (24-47; Previous: 30) – Laying back in hopes of catching the garter.
30. Minnesota Twins (23-48; Previous: 29) – Trivet in the shape of a walleye.