Mike DiMauro: Dr. I: Of the Yanks' ruin, Mora's whining and The Doggy

Sep. 30—Idle Thoughts, while waiting for college hoops, the Giants to tackle someone and for The Day Volleyball Classic (Oct. 9 at Mohegan Sun):

— Dr. Idle, Dr. I to his close friends, is on record vehemently despising baseball analytics. Not necessarily because Dr. I doesn't see them as an evaluation tool, but because their advocates rarely take the time to explain their significance within the context of baseball. Plus, their esoteric nature gives all the intellectuals, who rarely refuse the opportunity to show us their brilliance, a tingle.

Dr. I has long since believed the misguided application of analytics has slowly ruined the Yankees. Thirty-year old Dartmouth grads who think "Norm Cash" is a method of payment have supplanted people who actually played. Now the big, bad New York media has figured it out, too.

Writes Joel Sherman of the New York Post: "Those who scream about 'analytics' probably can't provide a coherent sentence on what analytics are or how the Yankees' version differs from those of metric-heavy organizations going to the postseason such as the Dodgers, Orioles and Rays.

"Yet, I believe that the Yankees' problems are rooted here, because Brian Cashman's baseball operations veered toward treating analytics as a bible rather than a tool. If you sell out completely on maximizing velocity or spin or bat speed, are you ever talking enough about game situations — about reading the scoreboard and the moment for what is needed?"

Writes Bob Klapisch of N.J. Advance Media: "(Aaron) Boone is forced to share his dugout and clubhouse with members of the analytics department. Here is what another ex-Yankee said after watching enough games on YES to finally turn off the TV in disgust:

"Guys hit home runs and there's like 10 non-player personnel high-fiving. Who are these people?" he said. "I would hate that. I would be like, 'Get the (bleep) out the dugout, you don't belong here.' Can you imagine Paul O'Neill about to smash the water cooler and there's five computer geeks in his way?

"Same thing in the clubhouse. When you have multiple levels of the front office going in and out of that room, computer guys and whoever else is in there with their iPads, that's bad for morale. It makes you wonder, 'Who's in charge here?' Because that room is supposed to be a special place for the players only. It's sacred. Obviously, things have changed."

— Is anything involving UConn football ever Jim Mora's fault?

Last season, after the Huskies got throttled at N.C. State and Michigan, he whined about the state of the program when he inherited it, referring to Randy Edsall as "what's his name" and accusing Edsall of abandoning the program during COVID.

Last week, he said of his receiving corps: "We went after a lot of wide receivers in the transfer portal and didn't have the money to get the ones we wanted. We're not a P5 (Power Five) team (with those) resources."

Note to Mr. Mora: Nobody forced you to accept this job. The circumstances come with the meal. If it's too hard, get out. If not, nobody wants to hear the excuses.

— RIP to the great Brooks Robinson.

It gets Dr. I thinking about his Mount Rushmore of third basemen: George Brett, Mike Schmidt, Chipper Jones and Brooks Robinson (with in-law apartments for Nettles and Eddie Matthews).

— The Yankees will finish in front of the Red Sox this season.

The Red Sox will finish last in the division for the sixth time in the last 12 years.

Both of these developments make Dr. I want to belt out a chorus of "Don't Worry, Be Happy."

— There are media rumblings that Christopher "Mad Dog" Russo will replace A-Rod on the Sunday night, ESPN2 show with Michael Kay.

Dr. I's take: Oh please, oh please, oh please.

The Dog hasn't lost an inch off his fastball. Still the best talk sports show host of them all. (Dr. I listens every day on XM 82).

— When Dr. I takes over the Federal Communications Commission: All talking heads who punctuate Travis Kelce highlights with Taylor Swift song titles and lyrics will be cuffed and given a one-way bus ticket to Pocatello, Idaho, where they will peel potatoes for an indeterminate amount of time.

— Dr. I's college pal Mike Crimmins, who lives in Denver, was lucky enough to get four tickets to Saturday's Colorado-USC football game.

Mike was excited until he learned that the game would kick off at 10 a.m. Denver time.

All because FOX needed to make this game its nitwit, "Big Noon Kickoff."

It's here Dr. I quotes the late, great Dan Jenkins, his favorite writer: "Every problem in this country I lay directly at the hands of television."

— Yes, that's Dr. I's guy Nick Helbig finishing his college football career at Wake Forest.

Helbig, a former Fitch great, was an all-conference defensive lineman at Wesleyan, winning the Joe Zabilski Award as New England's top defensive player in Divisions II and III. He's taking his grad transfer option at Wake.

— Did you all catch that kerfuffle between Tiki Barber and Joe Benigno the other day on WFAN?

Normally, you'd have to summon Beavis and Butthead to hear two people converse with less insight.

— A tip of the cap to Jack Barclay and the IAABO Basketball Officials for their recent Scholarship Dinner at the Italian Dramatic Club in New London. Two students (New London and St. Bernard) will receive scholarships worth $1,000 apiece.

"Thanks to the sponsors, the Italian Dramatic Club and Richard "Lefty" Rothstein for his magic show," Barclay said.

This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro