If it continued… (Chelsea v Manchester United)

Brooks Peck
Dirty Tackle

Two goals within the first five minutes of the start of the second half gave Chelsea a 3-0 lead over Manchester United at Stamford Bridge. That used to be an insurmountable advantage, but not anymore. Referee Howard Webb awarded Man United two penalties in an 11-minue span that Wayne Rooney put away before substitute Chicharito made it 3-3 with a header in the 84th minute. With a game like this, there really is just one question to ask: "What if it continued?"

97' -- David De Gea can't wait for the match to end so he can go home and upload his save against Juan Mata's free kick to YouTube 874 times, titling each one "f*** you!!!"

101' -- Florent Malouda finally realizes that he started this match.

105' -- Danny Welbeck falls.

106' -- Jose Mourinho dusts off his old Chelsea gear and wonders why Alex Ferguson didn't warn him about getting dropped in a ditch after making use of the small door into Howard Webb's mind.

111' -- Alex Ferguson attributes Man United's comeback to his own bold fashion choices on the day.

119' -- Ramires is unsure why John Terry keeps hugging him every time they're shown on camera.

124' -- Dimitar Berbatov reads a 1946 issue of Life Magazine about the birth of the bikini.

127' -- Frank Lampard completes his third post-graduate degree since the start of the season.

128' -- Danny Welbeck falls.

132' -- David Luiz decides that scoring goals is more fun than defending against them.

135' -- Jonny Evans starts looking for a house in Sunderland.

139' -- Wayne Rooney is given a two-match ban for having the hair equivalent of swearing into a TV camera.

140' -- Fernando Torres pulls a tremendous move to get around the last defender and finds himself all alone against De Gea. The two match each other's awkward, nervous hesitations, resulting in a never-ending stand-off in front of goal. The match is abandoned when everyone else slowly backs away, too uncomfortable to hang around.

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