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    Dirty Tackle
    • In what will be remembered as Pep Guardiola's final match with Barcelona (for now) Lionel Messi sandwiched his astounding 73 goal of the season inbetween two Pedro strikes, all within the first 25 minutes, to lead Barcelona to the Copa del Rey title over Athletic Bilbao.

      Messi's right-footed roof job (full highlights above) rounded his out of league goal total up to 23 for the year, which would be considered a spectacular haul for anyone over the course of an entire league season, let alone just in tournaments outside of league play. Add those cup goals to the nice round 50 he dropped over the course of La Liga and you have yourself a guy that without a doubt lead all humans, aliens, and video game characters in goals over the course of the 2011/12 campaign. Pedro, who was pipped out of his starting spot during the back stretch of Barcelona's Champions League run, ended the season on a solid note with goals in the 3rd and 25th minute to send the Blaugrana on its way.

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    • In anticipation of Euro 12, Dutch supermarket chain C1000 produced a music video featuring stars of the Netherlands team and hundreds of the little birdie toys it's offering fans/potential shoppers.

      During the video, you'll see Nigel De Jong's teammates sticking the orange toys to his head, Klaas-Jan Huntelaar almost eating one (but it wasn't made of grass, so he didn't), someone putting three on a kebab stick and grilling them, plus Arjen Robben sticking them to his backside and bending over. In other words, it's...strange.

      And now we must wait and see if these things horrify the world by bursting out of Robin van Persie's chest during a group stage match.

      Video via 101gg

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    • Bebe being laughed at and not caring. (Getty)

      Ring the bells and wake the children -- the King of Old Trafford, Portuguese sensation Bebe, is returning to Manchester United after his almost not completely terrible loan spell in Turkey. The 21-year-old Sir Alex Ferguson bought sight unseen for £7.4 million in August of 2010 has yet to be unloaded and never spoken of again, so he will now rejoin Man United until that inevitably happens.

      And how did his year-long loan with Besiktas go? Well, you can't improve on perfection. From the Telegraph:

      However, an early season cruciate ligament injury halted Bebe's early progress at Besiktas and he fell foul of coach Tayfur Havutcu last month when he was fined and banished to train away from the first-team after allegedly breaking a curfew in the build-up to a derby game against Galatasaray.

      United are understood to be prepared to sell Bebe should they receive a suitable offer for the Portugal U-21 winger, but with the player just two years into a five-year contract, he is likely to rejoin

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    • Shortly after Chelsea beat Bayern Munich in a penalty shootout to win the Champions League final, Fernando Torres reportedly claimed that he volunteered to take one of the all-important shots, saying, "I wanted to take a penalty but they didn't let me." And now video showing the moment Roberto Di Matteo left him out of the order makes it clear that Torres didn't hide his frustration.

      With the score 1-1 after extra time, Di Matteo gathered his players and announced the order in which they would be taking the shots. When Torres didn't hear his name called, he threw up his hands and turned to walk away, but the Chelsea interim manager grabbed him by the arm and tried to calm him down before the decisive shootout.

      Back in March, while Torres was still in the midst of his scoring drought, Juan Mata offered him the chance to take a penalty during Chelsea's 2-0 FA Cup fifth round replay win over Birmingham in his place, but Torres refused.

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    • Athletic Bilbao will play Barcelona in the Copa del Rey final in Madrid on Friday and its fans were very eager to give the team a warm send-off (literally). Some packed into the back of a truck that followed the team's bus to the airport, while others waited there with flares and flags held aloft.

      Though the flares didn't make it inside the airport for obvious reasons, the fans, their flags and what appeared to be a Marco Bielsa pirate puppet all did.

    • Giovanni Moreno in a more carefree moment. (Getty)

      It's been a tumultuous few months for Argentine Primera Division side Racing Club. First, Teo Gutierrez threatened his teammates with a paintball gun after they reacted negatively to him getting sent off in a losing effort, then fans threw crutches on the pitch during a Copa Argentina match to protest the team's poor form and now, they're combining those two incidents by threatening members of the team at gunpoint.

      Racing Club players Giovanni Moreno and Federico Santander were leaving training together when another car cut them off and blocked their way. Two men then got out of the car and the situation took a sickening turn.

      From Reuters:

      "They told Gio they would shoot him in the legs and would ruin his career," Paraguayan Santander told a radio interview late on Tuesday.

      "I thought they were going to shoot him. He was terrified as I was. I'm frightened, I don't know what to do.

      "They said that if we did not win the game, we would suffer the consequences."

      Moreno's agent Agustin

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    • When kicking off, you don't usually see footballers take a David Luiz style run up to the ball and fire it at the opposing team, but the kid at the start of this video decided to give it a try. And after kicking the ball and charging ahead like an invading army of one, a player on the opposing team decided to blast the ball right back where it came from, resulting in the aggressive kick-off kid getting smacked in the face and launching backwards through the air.

      As the flying kid's father notes in his YouTube description (he uploaded the video apparently), "My son learned a lesson the hard way. ... Best thing of all is that he got up and kept playing and his team ended up scoring. What a tough kid."

      Except to see Rino Gattuso give this a try wherever he ends up playing next season.

      This has been the Dirty Tackle of the Day: a chronicling of unfortunate events.

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    • Arjen Robben warms up for his abuse. (Getty)

      Just three days after Arjen Robben missed a penalty kick that might have won the Champions League final for Bayern Munich, his club hosted his national team -- the Netherlands -- for a friendly in the same stadium that housed his nightmare. And though some of the 33,000 fans in attendance at the Allianz Arena were forgiving, others booed Robben's every touch of the ball after he entered the match as a second half substitute for the Netherlands, who lost 3-2.

      Robben's international teammate (and former Bayern teammate), Mark van Bommel, was not amused by the harsh response. From Goal.com:

      "It's a disgrace. When you look at what Robben has achieved in his career. He led Bayern to the final at Madrid and is so important to the club. Bayern should be really happy to have a player like him," the veteran told SBS6 after the match.

      "Arjen has signed a new three-year contract but if I was him I would think twice about my future. I don't know what Arjen will do, but I would think about leaving the club if I was him.

      "Nobody from the club supports him, I'm the only one that supports him in the press. Mentally he is very strong. Everytime something bad happens to him, he comes back stronger."

      "Bayern Munich should be ashamed," Rafael van der Vaart told Bild, echoing Van Bommel's sentiment. "We expected no such thing. It's embarrassing."

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    • Didier Drogba leaves with his flag cape and big, shiny parting gift. (Getty)

      After a few days of intensified speculation and rumors, Didier Drogba brought a relatively swift end to the guessing over his future and announced he will leave Chelsea when his contract ends in June.

      As Drogba told ITV, he decided that winning the Champions League was his chance to follow the Seinfeld method and go out on a high note like George Costanza.

      "Winning the game was the turning point, " he said. "That's why I decided - we made history all together and I want people to remember that - and I think that's the best time to move on."

      As sad as it is to see him go, Drogba really didn't have anything left to prove after winning the Champions League. He scored 157 goals in 338 matches for Chelsea, won three Premier League titles, four FA Cups (becoming the only player to score in four FA Cup finals), two Carling Cups and two golden boot awards. He successfully vanquished all disgraces and accomplished everything he could've hoped, so now it's time for something new.

      Here's Didier's parting message to his fans...

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    • Citta the elephant consumes a football

      Paul the Octopus wowed us with his soothsaying skills during World Cup 2010, but he has since moved on to the exploitative aquarium in the sky. Since his passing, man has longed for a new animal-based method of predicting football results. The Champions League Llama may have a 100% record by calling Chelsea's unlikely victory over Bayern Munich, but Poland and Ukraine are each boasting their own zoo creatures to help gamblers who don't want to rely on statistics and facts when making game predictions.

      Ukraine will be acquiring the services of a two-year-old pig, who — much like Wayne Rooney — loves drinking beer and eating fries in his down time. Instead of ending up as a key component of the Ukrainian national dish of sliced hog fat, the imaginatively-named 'Psychic Pig' will be at the heart of the action throughout the tournament, says Mercury News:

      [...] He will be brought to a specially-built house in central Kiev outside the Olympic Stadium,

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