It's necessary to point out, before we start pointing fingers and laughing, that the court battle between Gilbert Arenas(notes) and his former girlfriend is nothing to cackle over. There are children in the middle, and Gilbert's ex is trying to wrangle a settlement that is in the best interests of those children.
That said, wow. That's a lot of money you've spent, there, Gilbert Arenas. And even in the middle of a six-year, $111 million contract (that followed a six-year, nearly $64 million contract), there's absolutely no way Gilbert Arenas can keep up this lifestyle for much longer.
What lifestyle? According to court records obtained by the Washington Post, this lifestyle:
There's a lot about how Arenas spent his money, based on her understanding of the household finances: "he states he makes 1.5 million per month," read the notes. Arenas lavished plenty on their Great Falls home, dropping $100,000 on landscaping, $5,000 a month for housekeepers, $675 "per car" washing, and $1 million for his backyard pool and grotto. His sharks are expensive: $5,000 a month to feed them and $1,500 for a keeper to drive from Columbus to take care of them.
He was extravagant when it came to toys for the children -- ages 5, 4 and 2 -- buying a $60,000 train set and an $8,000 toy Mercedes-Benz electric car, and dropping between $30,000 and $40,000 during a shopping spree at FAO Schwartz. (Arenas also told this story on the blog, but didn't divulge the amount of money spent.)
"His sharks are expensive." Whoa, boy.
There is some debate as to whether or not Arenas, currently shooting under 40 percent from the field in Orlando while playing on a surgically reconstructed left knee, will even be able to play beyond his current contract, which expires in 2014. So this is just about it for him, and it's not a stretch to say that Arenas (though that contract is easily the league's worst) will be traded a few more times before the deal is done.
So please, Gilbert, let's refrain from building a shark-filled grotto in Orlando. And maybe look into goldfish futures, back in the District of Columbia.
Also, do right by the woman who is raising your kids. And say "hi" to the sharks for me.
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- Gilbert Arenas