Create-a-Caption: Don't even think about it, LeBron James

The referees don't want to hear about your right arm, LeBron James(notes). We all remember the last time you complained of pain there, and we know all about how it was an ailment so mysterious and debilitating that diagnosing it would've confounded House. We just want to move on. And don't you try the puppy dog eyes. Just. Don't. Do. It.

Best caption wins a no-expenses-paid trip to Elbow Beach. Good luck.

In our last adventure: Gordon Hayward plays with pegging.

Winner, Roger Mason(notes) Jr. = Hero:

[Jarron] Collins' plastic surgeon advised him to avoid sports where balls fly at his face.

Runner-up, thelegendarygregostertag: Although they showed poise and incomparable creativity, Gordon Hayward(notes) and Jerron Collins were eliminated from "Dancing With the Stars" for their use of an illegal prop.

Second runner-up, gotwhelk: "Oh my God, a spider!"
"Don't move, I got it"