Wittenmyer & Williams: A Christmas wish list for Cincinnati Reds, Bengals, Joe Burrow

Welcome to Wittenmyer & Williams – a point/counterpoint column from Enquirer Reds reporter Gordon Wittenmyer and columnist Jason Williams. Today, they discuss their Christmas wish list for the Reds and other Greater Cincinnati teams and sports figures.

Wittenmyer: Hey, JDub, it’s that time of year again. Holiday gift-giving season.

Williams: Don’t expect anything from me.

Wittenmyer: That’s a two-way street, pal. But that’s not what I was talking about. If you look around Cincinnati sports, there’s a lot of needy people we cover out there. So let’s see what we can do for some of them in the spirit of the season.

Williams: I know what Nick Krall could use – one of those fancy starting pitchers.

Wittenmyer: Yeah, not one of those cheap ones with the parts that break easy. Or the kind with the batteries that start running out in the fourth inning.

Williams: I know the White Sox were asking the Reds a crazy price for Dylan Cease. Chicago wanted Edwin Arroyo, Rhett Lowder, Connor Phillips and at least one more prospect. Do they think Krall is Santa Claus? That’s enough to put you on the naughty list all by itself. If you’re going to spend that much, go get Houston’s Framber Valdez. He’s an All-Star workhorse.

Wittenmyer: I like that, and here’s another one for you: San Diego is selling off players. Maybe they can get Yu Darvish if the Reds are willing to take on his contract.

Williams: What?! The guy who finished the season on the injured list with an elbow injury?! And the Padres still owe Darvish $83 million over the next five years. He’s also 37 years old.

Wittenmyer: And he has a full no-trade clause, too. The latest reports are the elbow is fine now, and when this guy is right, he’s as good as it gets. Having covered Darvish in Chicago, I really enjoyed him. Great sense of humor. Good clubhouse guy. And with that much left on his contract, he might not cost as many prospects to get.

Williams: Leave that gift wrapped under a palm tree in San Diego for some other team.

Wittenmyer: What, are you waiting for a Christmas miracle? There aren’t a lot of good ones left out there that are in the Reds price range.

Williams: Here’s one that won’t cost anything for someone else with the Reds – a two-strike approach for Elly De La Cruz. Actually, he could probably use a no-strike approach the way the season ended for him. De La Cruz struck out 36% of the time and hit .191 after the All-Star break.

Wittenmyer: That would be the gift that keeps on giving for the Reds all season in 2024.

Williams: Let’s spread the holiday joy. Bengals fans deserve a lot after what they’ve gone through this season. So how about a playoff appearance for the Joe Burrow-less, injury-plagued Bengals?

Wittenmyer: There’s your Christmas miracle. If we’re going to go down that road, how about a new wrist for Joe Burrow and a new shoulder for Ja’Marr Chase.

Williams: I feel so bad about Burrow with all the injuries he’s fought through. He overcame the calf injury early this season only to be knocked out for the season with the wrist injury. In fact, I feel so bad about the wrist injury, heck, I’ll give him mine.

Wittenmyer: I think the Bengals might be better off sticking with Jake Browning’s for now. In fact, you talk about who’s been very, very good this year, it’s my guy Browning. This guy deserves a starting NFL job next year under his tree – or at least as soon as his Bengals contract runs out.

Williams: Another guy who deserves a better opportunity – Joey Votto. My gift for him is a one-year contract with the Pittsburgh Pirates and a productive year that bolsters his Hall of Fame credentials. It’s also a gift for Reds fans because that assures Votto two trips to Great American Ball Park in 2024.

Wittenmyer: And while we’re on the subject of baseball contracts, how about a lump of coal – or a stocking full of simmering Skyline – for the smart guy bean counter who came up with Shohei Ohtani’s crazy, $700 million deal with the Dodgers.

Williams: You mean the one that defers $680 million of it until after he’s done playing for them? It’s an obvious tax benefit for the player and a competitive advantage for the team.

Wittenmyer: Maybe it’s not so crazy. I mean, aren’t the Reds paying Ken Griffey Jr. another $3.6 million next year, 16 years after his last game for the Reds?

Williams: It’s no different than the jelly of the month club. It’s the gift that keeps on giving. Well, for Junior.

Wittenmyer: While we’re on the subject of jelly, that reminds me of the Bearcats hoops team. Their defense is as soft and squishy as a jar of Smucker’s. After the Xavier and Dayton games, Santa needs to bring these guys some hard hats and flame-retardant jerseys for that Big 12 gauntlet coming up to start the conference season.

Williams: Five of UC’s first six Big 12 games are against top-20 teams. These guys can’t win the Southwest Ohio-area championship, they got no chance in the Big 12 at this rate. But maybe Santa can bring coach Wes Miller that one signature win he’s been looking for since arriving in Cincinnati.

Wittenmyer: You sure are stacking up these Christmas miracles on your wish list. As long as we’re going there, how about we get a top-4 Big East finish and NCAA berth for Sean Miller and his overhauled Xavier Musketeers. He should be off the naughty list by now after that little bit of tension in Arizona a few years ago. And if nothing else, that would at least give my Washington Huskies another quality win on their resume.

Williams: That wouldn’t be a miracle if Miller gets the Musketeers to the tournament. He knows how to get a team ready for March.

Wittenmyer: March. You’re making me think of spring training and the Reds pitching staff again. I keep thinking they go get Darvish.

Williams: What’s your obsession with Yu Darvish?

Wittenmyer: Because it sounds a lot better than all I want for Christmas is Framber.

Contact Gordon Wittenmyer at gwittenmyer@enquirer.com and on X @GDubMLB. Reach Jason Williams at jwilliams@enquirer.com and @jwilliamscincy.

This article originally appeared on Cincinnati Enquirer: Christmas wish list for Cincinnati Reds, Bengals, Joe Burrow, Votto