Michigan's football spy ring tried to do the wrong thing, and that should matter | Whitley

Did Michigan cheat, or is the NCAA just picking on Jim Harbaugh over harmless gamesmanship?

That is the question engulfing college football since the sign-stealing saga broke last week. For guidance, a vintage episode of “Cheers” comes to mind.

Sam the bartender has a night out with an old fling and her 20-something daughter. He comes in the next day and the boys at the bar presume their love-machine hero had his way with both women.

They start yelling “Sammy! Sammy! Sammy!”

Sam winces. He says he intended to have a multi-generational tryst, but things fell apart and he couldn’t go through with it. After a few seconds of stunned silence, Norm chimes in.

“That’s okay,” he said. “The important thing is you tried to do the wrong thing.”

Fast forward to Connor Stalions, the alleged leader of the spy ring that went around taping games of upcoming opponents. That alone would violate NCAA rules and allow us to forever claim the Harbaugh era was a modern-day version of the Black Sox.

But is it really that big of a deal?

A lot of people are saying this is like the NCAA cops ticketing a driver for going 57 mph in a 55-mph zone. Everybody tries to steal signs. The Wolverines might have pushed the video envelope, but no real advantage was gained.

Then you see the video of last year’s Ohio State game, and Stalions staring intently across the field at Ohio State’s sideline. The Buckeyes signaled in a play, prompting Stalions and Michigan players to start pointing toward the sky.

Sure enough, it was a pass play.

Coincidence?

Maybe the players were just suddenly trying to loosen up or were signaling “We’re No. 1!” Maybe Stalions was just visiting sick relatives on all those road trips and just happened to catch a game while he was in their towns.

It’s not as if Harbaugh needed to know the gameplans of Northwestern, Indiana and Iowa to run roughshod over the Big Ten the past couple of years.

Maybe Spygate II is a silly kerfuffle being hyped by media and Ohio State fans. As all this unfolds, just remember one important thing.

It sure looks as if Michigan tried to do the wrong thing.

Now, assuming Stalions didn’t do a lot of freelance work for SEC schools, here are the teams that should win this weekend:

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Florida-Georgia: Or is it Georgia-Florida? Kirby Smart goes with the latter, reasoning the winning team should go first. Unlike the past couple of years, the Gators can realistically hope to change that. UGA’s looked vulnerable. Brock Bowers is out. Pigs sometimes fly. All that should make things interesting. But when the last cocktail is served, G will still come before F. Georgia 27-17

South Carolina at Texas A&M: Kevin Sumlin was 45-22 after 67 games at Texas A&M, and eventually got axed. Jimbo Fisher is 43-24 after 67 games. Aggies boosters might as well have invested all that money in crypto. Luckily for them, Sam Bankman-Fried could coach a team past the Gamecocks. Texas A&M 24-16

Mississippi State at Auburn: The Bulldogs’ QB situation is a mess, but Auburn’s is a disaster. The only teams with fewer 10-yard passes than the Tigers (36) are service academies, none of which have attempted a pass since 1987. For hardcores only. Auburn 10-6

Clemson at N.C. State: The Tigers have fallen so far this game is on The CW. “I have no idea what that is,” Dabo Swinney said. “Nancy Drew” is one of the network’s top shows. Swinney should hire her to solve the mysterious disappearance of his football program. NC State 21-17

Old Dominion at James Madison: The Dukes are 7-0 and ranked No. 25, and 96% of college football fans don’t know whether James Madison or Old Dominion are the Dukes. Roll on, Dookies. James Madison 33-15

Tennessee at Kentucky: Based on comparative scores, Florida beat Tennessee by 13 points and Kentucky beat Florida by 19 points. But factor in Kentucky’s rickety defense and QB Devin Leary’s passing arm coming down with case of vertigo, and… Tennessee 24-21

Update: After a three-game suspension this year, Harbaugh said Michigan would be the “gold standard” for compliance. The price of gold immediately plummeted from $1,943 an ounce to $63.

Vanderbilt at Ole Miss: Vandy holds the NCAA record for being the only team nobody has bothered to try to illegally steal signs from. Nothing to see here, folks. Ole Miss 39-14

USC at Cal: Things have soured quickly for Lincoln Riley, who didn’t let his players speak to media after last week’s loss to Utah. If he loses to Cal, the only thing fans will want him to say is, “I resign.” Cal’s just too Cal to make it happen. USC 42-23

James Madison Trivia: No college football championship team has been won by a school named after a president, though Trump University claims the 2020 title.

Virginia at Miami: The ‘Canes beat Clemson last week to relegate the Tigers to The CW. That won’t be an issue for Virginia, which has only appeared on the Weather Channel during thunderstorms this year. Miami 29-12

Last Week: 6-3. Season 55-23

Bonus prediction: NCAA scuba divers will one day find Connor Stalions' smashed cell phone at the bottom of Lake Michigan.

David Whitley is The Gainesville Sun's sports columnist. Contact him at dwhitley@gannett.com. Follow him on Twitter @DavidEWhitley

This article originally appeared on The Gainesville Sun: Michigan football tried to do wrong with spy ring