Man United star reportedly will publish book of poetry in time for Christmas

To paraphrase a picnic basket-swiping cartoon character, Juan Mata is smarter than the average bear.

While most Premier League superstars appear to spend their free time customizing cars, playing Xbox and buying absurdly expensive clothes, the Spanish midfielder embarks on cultural and educational pursuits.

He has studied for two degrees while playing professionally (in sports science and physical education), he writes a weekly blog on his website (always signing off with the word “hugs,” confirming his status as the world’s most adorable soccer star) and his Instagram is full of arty snaps from his travels (rather than carefully posed selfies wearing the aforementioned absurdly expensive clothes).

Now, it appears that Mata will be expressing himself via the medium of poetry.

According to Spanish sports newspaper Marca, the Manchester United star hopes to indulge his love of verse with his own collection of writing (translated via Sports Witness):

We may have to wait until the festive period to discover the kind of poetry Mata will be publishing. Perhaps he will prefer a traditional “ABCB” rhyming scheme, such as this:

Man United are red,
Chelsea are blue,
When Mourinho becomes manager,
My time is through.

Or maybe he will give us some Heiku.

Lush grass under feet
Or cold bench under backside—
Unusued substitute.

Mata isn’t the first Red Devil to express a love of poetry. Last year, Wayne Rooney revealed that he used to write poems before and during the courtship of his wife Coleen.

Perhaps a poetic duo to rival Wordsworth and Coleridge awaits us at Old Trafford?