Georgia one-ups Florida in college football playoff political pandering showdown | Whitley
The “Florida Man” meme has become a cultural signifier for bizarre goofiness. Thanks to a Georgia Man, we’re looking a tad less dopey.
Our comrade is Georgia state senator Colton Moore, who’s jumped into the ongoing College Football Playoff controversy. It’s ongoing because Florida politicians are all worked up over the CFP snubbed unbeaten FSU. More importantly, they know potential voters are all worked up.
Sen. Rick Scott is demanding emails, notes, phone logs and dental records of CFP selection committee members. Attorney General Ashley Moody started an antitrust investigation. Gov. Ron DeSantis has set aside $1 million to help fund potential lawsuits.
Next up: Donald Trump vows to deport all 13 CFP selection committee members to Mexico.
I don’t think it’s inherently frivolous when politicians voice concerns over sports issues. This one does have life-or-death importance to many constituents. It’s just a bit much to launch a formal investigation and tacitly accuse CFP selectors of being bought off like a bunch of Russian figure skating judges.
But just when you thought Florida Man/Woman had secured the No. 1 ranking in this political pander-fest, along came Moore.
He thinks his state’s beloved Bulldogs also got jobbed out of a playoff spot. He sent a letter to the CFP asking that the Orange Bowl between Georgia and FSU be delayed a week and designated a playoff game, “or otherwise make accommodations.”
Like what?
Give FSU and Georgia automatic bids to the next three playoffs?
Delay the Orange Bowl until UGA can sign Patrick Mahomes and Taylor Swift out of the transfer portal?
Burn all tapes of Georgia’s SEC title game loss to Alabama?
Colton didn’t specify, but that doesn’t really matter. His approval rating in Georgia’s 53rd Senate District probably jumped 20 points. You can just see Scott's strategists reading about Colton’s move and kicking themselves.
“Dang it, why didn’t we think of that?”
Fear not, there’s still more than a week before the Orange Bowl. They’ll probably come up with something …
Growing up: New father, Bartow grad Clayton thriving in first season with Gators after transfer
Secondary assistance: Florida football lands portal commitment from Oregon defensive back
Stud of the Week: Aaron Rodgers for his amazing recovery from a torn Achilles in Week 1. If the Jets didn’t stink, he could have been cleared this week. Sadly, modern science is still incapable of transplanting a functional offensive line into the Jets.
Stud II: LA Bowl host Rob Gronkowski, for being brave enough to sing the national anthem before that game. If you muted your speaker, it was a stirring performance.
Dud of the Week: Rob Gronkowski, for not lip-synching Whitney Houston’s version of the national anthem from the 1991 Super Bowl.
Dud II: The Detroit Pistons, for running their losing streak to 23 games heading into this week. They are officially the worst product to come out of Detroit since the Chevrolet Vega. …
Six jerseys worn by Lionel Messi during the 2022 World Cup sold for $7.8 million last week. Not to be outdone, Donald Trump started selling 2,024 pieces of his famous “mug shot” suit for $99 apiece. If that strategy works, expect a lot of athletes to starve carving their uniforms into tiny pieces …
One of countless Florida Man headlines: “Florida Man Threw Live Gator in Wendy’s Drive-Thru Window.” More to follow. …
California Man: San Francisco Giants officials say a big reason Shohei Ohtani turned down their $700 million offer was free agents are turned off by the city’s spiral into crime, homelessness, and open-air drug markets.
Ohtani representatives denied that, saying their client simply preferred driving past L.A.’s rampant squalor on his way to work every day. …
Former NFL running back Rashard Mendenhall tweeted Monday that the Pro Bowl should be between all-Black and all-white teams, and that he was better than any white player in NFL history. He was immediately offered head DEI positions at six Ivy League schools. …
“Florida Man Calls 911 Says He Needs a Ride to Hooters” …
Jersey II: Donald Trump’s website touts his Mug Shot Suit as “The most historically significant artifact in American history.” Thomas Jefferson could not be reached for comment. …
New Florida Man: UF hired defensive back coach Will Harris away from the LA Chargers last Monday. Three days later, LA gave up 63 points to the Raiders. Hey, Gator fans should take good omens anywhere they can find them these days. …
CFP Update: Rick Scott’s office has sent a letter demanding the selection committee “henceforth be made up of Chief Osceola and 12 members of Seminoles Boosters Inc.” …
“Florida Man Breaks INTO Jail to Hang With Friends” …
To help pay for Shohei Ohtani’s $700 million contract, the Dodgers plan to start cutting his jerseys, pants and game-worn underwear into 2,024 pieces and selling them for $99 apiece. …
Artifact Redux: In case you studied U.S. History at Harvard, Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence and owned two mint condition 1952 Topps Mickey Mantle trading cards. …
“Florida Man Admits Killing Goat and Drinking Its Blood for Pagan Sacrifice, Would Still Like to Be Senator.”
Only in Florida. And maybe Georgia. …
That’s about all the space we have for this week’s Whitley’s Believe It or Not. Till next time, if Wendy’s screws up your drive-thru order, please just complain to the manager.
David Whitley is The Gainesville Sun's sports columnist. Contact him at dwhitley@gannett.com. Follow him on Twitter @DavidEWhitley
This article originally appeared on The Gainesville Sun: Politicians pounce on College Football Playoff controversy
