Robert Allenby wants you to believe his kidnapping story even though he doesn't remember it himself

SCOTTSDALE, Ariz. – Robert Allenby wants you to believe what happened to him on Jan. 16 even though he doesn't remember exactly what happened to him on Jan. 16.

So began another bizarre chapter in L'Affair Allenby.

"The No. 1 thing that you should all remember is that my story stays exactly the same as the way I told it," he insisted Tuesday at a press conference prior to this weekend's Waste Management Phoenix Open. Allenby stridently defended himself and took the media to task for doubting his story, which goes as follows:

After missing the cut at a tournament in Honolulu last month, Allenby said he went to a bar, had a few drinks, left the bar only to be knocked unconscious. He claimed he woke up in a park six miles away to two men kicking him. There, a homeless woman, along with a retired miltary man, chased away the assailants, told him he'd been dumped there from the trunk of a car, and helped Allenby get a cab back to his hotel.

At some point Allenby took a selfie of his injuries, which was broadcast on the Golf Channel, and the world honed in on his story.

Only it turned out the homeless woman never told him he was dumped from the trunk of a car, and that she didn't find him in a park six miles away, but rather around the corner from the bar. Allenby did, however, incur a $3,400 charge to his credit card from a strip club that may or may not have been run up by Allenby himself.

"From about 11:06 to about 1:27 a.m. [that night]," Allenby insisted Tuesday, "I have no memory in my brain."

So he has no idea who he left the bar with, no idea if he went to the strip club, had no idea what his phone number was when he returned to awareness, yet the one thing he wants everyone to remember is that his story stays the same.

Allenby then took to blaming the press Tuesday – "obviously the media have decided that they are the most amazing experts at investigations," he said – but in doing so failed to see that the media is assisting in finding out what really happened.

This has been the problem from the very start of this saga: Allenby provided the Golf Channel the selfie of his injured face and surely expected sympathy. He did not expect scrutiny. But he got some of both, and he wanted only one.

"I was a victim," he said, "and all of a sudden you're putting the blame on me."

Maybe he's right. Maybe he was a victim. Maybe something bad did happen to him. But to expect a story with gaping holes to be accepted as gospel is to completely misunderstand how the public responds to an unsolved crime.

It is certainly sad that Allenby's kids have to read about their dad's ordeal online, and they are probably privy to quite a bit of unfair commentary about where he was and what he did. Allenby got somewhat emotional Tuesday when talking about his family, and he absolutely deserves sympathy for having to transition from a relatively anonymous golfer to the target of countless jokes and rumors.

But Allenby is not making his situation better. He did not have to face the press on Tuesday, any more than he had to take a selfie of his injuries. Even if he didn't bring his injuries upon himself, the insults will only mount if he continues to insist on having the story unfold only in a way he's comfortable with.