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Ball Don't Lie

Jose Calderon takes a seat, shows off his (dubious) shot-missing skills (VIDEO)

Dan Devine
Ball Don't Lie

"Hey, Jose — I know I've told you before, but I just want to say again: We're so glad to have you on the Kia Motors team. Say, we'd love to put together a cool little 'viral video' to help promote you and our line of cars ... how about we come up with something cool you can do and we'll shoot it while the camera ops set up the next take?"


"Hey, can you jump over a car? Not sure we want to go down that road again, but it did work out pretty well the last time we had a guy do it."


"OK, no big deal. ... Wait, not even the kinda-sorta fake way that Blake did it?"


"OK, OK. Totally fine. Hmm ... hey, I know. You're a Spanish point guard with some flash. How about you sit down in front of the car and make a bunch of shots in a row, like Ricky Rubio did a couple of months back?"


"Great! Fire when ready, Jose."

"All right! I made the last three!"

"Don't worry about it, Jose. We will CGI them into weird, high-arcing misses so that it looks like they all got stuck between the rim and backboard."

"Why would you do this?"

"Because Internet."

"Do I have to look happy about this? I am accurate at shooting, normally."

"No. Definitely look like you aren't sure you even want to be here. If there's anything Internet abhors, it's evident exertion of effort."


Fin. Via.

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