Cagewriter - UFC

Welcome to another week of "The Ultimate Fighter." Take a break from trying to win UFC 104 tickets, and enjoy this recap, won't you? As last week is reviewed, we find out that Team Rampage lost. Again. This time, it was Wes Sims losing to Justin Wren.

At the house, Darrill Schoonover is drinking beer at 8 a.m. That may come to bite him in the butt as Rashad Evans brings in Phil Nurse to coach, and he runs the team ragged. Evans mentions that he is disappointed in Schoonover's cardio. I wonder why it's so bad? This makes Evans have a quick intervention. It's nowhere near as good as an intervention as when the Walsh family tries to keep Dylan McKay from drinking.

For some reason, Quinton "Rampage" Jackson has decided to pick on Schoonover. He already gave him the nickname of "Titties," and continues to bully the hell out of him. When Schoonover finally fights back, Jackson then gets in his face.

Schoonover needs to put his faceoff with Rampage behind him, as he and Zak Jensen are picked to fight. Rampage says, "Got Milk?" as Jensen and Schoonover face off. No one laughs the first time, so he repeats it. Schoonover gets pissed and walks towards Rampage, but nothing happens except Jackson continues to run his mouth. Evans tries to be the voice of reason, but I don't think reason works with Rampage.

Moving onto Zak Jensen, Kimbo Slice says, "If Shrek had a little brother, it would be him." They call him Linderman and his team loves picking on him. Sims starts a pool, gambling on when Jensen is going to "flip out." The winner gets a care package from Sims, which might not really be a prize. 

After Rashad "roughs up" Schoonover to get him ready for his fight, it switches to Team Rampage and a special present coach Tiki Ghosn has for his team. It's a caricature painting of Team Rashad, who they call Team Cocky. Schoonover is depicted as wearing a bra with a large breasts.

Is Kimbo in?

While practicing with Wes Shivers, Jensen gets a cut over his right eye. As it pours out blood, Kimbo Slice assumes that he will get to fight again. Tiki counsels Kimbo to calm down about the chance to fight, but keep practicing. Unfortunately for Kimbo, Jensen doesn't see a problem with the cut.

At Team Rashad's practice, the coaches get there early and spot the painting. Rashad laughs at it, but is worried about what Schoonover's reaction would be, and takes down the painting. Rashad tells his team about the painting but doesn't show it to them and reminds them to stay focused. 

Since Jensen was the last fighter picked, no one expects much out of him, including Dana White. Even he expects Schoonover to win. Kimbo Slice and McSweeney bet Tapout shirts on the winner of the fight. People really will gamble on anything.

To really show just how immature Rampage is, he and Tiki write "Titties" on Schoonover's door. Schoonover blows it off, but he's clearly pissed. Rampage, showing his excellent coaching abilities, "pumps up" Jensen by repeating, "The guy has titties." I don't see how that would help Jensen win. 

Darrill Schoonover (Team Rashad) vs. Zak Jensen (Team Rampage)

Round 1: Schoon drives Jensen into the fence, and as they move away, Schoon lands a ton of knees and punches. Jensen gets a takedown and tries to work ground and pound until Schoon locks in a triangle choke. Jensen lasts for a while, but is finally choked out. Schoonover wins.

That moves Team Rashad's record to 6-0. Rampage and Tiki bring in the "Team Cocky" painting, but they are disappointed that no one gets mad. Apparently, Team Rashad knows that the best way to deal with a bully is to ignore him.

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  1. EvilGar
    1. Posted by EvilGar Thu Oct 22, 2009 12:57 am EDT

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    Another classy showing by Rampage. The best part about this season is that once it is over, we hopefully never have to hear about Rampage in MMA again.
  2. jim
    2. Posted by jim Thu Oct 22, 2009 1:15 am EDT

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    love the dylan mckay reference mags. Zak had a way bigger rack than Darrill. Did anyone notice Rampage's Mr. T impression. I found it interesting that they wud show that. rampage is an awful coach. that was a "great" pre-fight pep talk. Completely agree with allen on the fact that i dont see any chance that a single one of these fighters cud even give one legit heavyweight in the UFC a real fight.
  3. Eli the Ace
    3. Posted by Eli the Ace Thu Oct 22, 2009 1:46 am EDT

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    Worse season yet imo
  4. Eli the Ace
    4. Posted by Eli the Ace Thu Oct 22, 2009 1:46 am EDT

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    Worse season yet imo
  5. jayyolf1
    5. Posted by jayyolf1 Thu Oct 22, 2009 2:42 am EDT

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    WoW! Zak Jensen, you SUCK! you stayed in the triangle for almost the entire round!!?? WTF were you thinking man! Did you learn nothing from when you got choked out by the SAME move in practice!!?? Damn bro, and I was rooting for you 'cause you got picked last, and b/c Darrill is nothing but a drunk wit no future in ufc.....watch, next round when he faces someone that doesn't suck Darrill will get wasted (and I'm not talking about liquor!).
    No wonder you got picked last Zak.........terrible. Go back to your day job, 'cause the real competition out there in MMA will destroy you
    ........dude stays in a triangle choke and doesn't even attempt to get out of it. moron
  6. jayyolf1
    6. Posted by jayyolf1 Thu Oct 22, 2009 2:50 am EDT

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    The previews better be true about next week. Dana better not be clapping for some weak ass fight!!! I am so sick of these first round weak ass fights!!! oh well, what should be expected of the first round of fights, I guess.
  7. jayyolf1
    7. Posted by jayyolf1 Thu Oct 22, 2009 2:54 am EDT

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    Allen - I think it looks like Rampage that rips the door in half.....AND (sadly), that is one of the best things on the show so far: seeing that scene on the previews......$h!t makes me laugh every time!!!!
  8. hookers4jesus
    8. Posted by hookers4jesus Thu Oct 22, 2009 3:10 am EDT

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    just think, some of these fighters have more experience than some of the current UFC HWs. poor Dana White, i bet he wishes he could just not have a heavyweight division. best he can do is a WWF product with nothing but wrasslin' skills. poor guy. the whole hw division is pathetic and he knows it.
  9. EL Grubbo
    9. Posted by EL Grubbo Thu Oct 22, 2009 3:36 am EDT

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    Darrill's got 10 wins professionally, so he can't be that bad. He had good, crisp moves in there, even for a tubbo. He seemed to have a fight mentality in there and was able to cope with what came up pretty quickly. Also, when he was popping shot after shot into Jensen's face....that didn't look like luck. Jensen started looking like Griffin, all dopey and open-mouthed, covered in his own blood. The only problem is, when that happens to Griffin, he (ahem, NORMALLY) gets working harder. Schoonover would have won either way.
    As far as Rampage goes, he's a classless bum. When the contestants start this hazing stuff, it's normal and expected. They want to get their pecking order in, and Schoonover and Jensen were at the bottom. Since when does the coach have a right to dish it out MORE than ANYONE ELSE in the house? It's B.S. Rampage looks more like a thug and a bully than ever. Way to burn your bridges.
  10. James R
    10. Posted by James R Thu Oct 22, 2009 5:49 am EDT

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    I started watching the show being a Rampage fan and not liking Evans but I have totally turned around on that. Evans has been a total pro and all around stand up guy. Rampage as you can tell has always been a bully and a blowhard always making fun of people, he can dish it out but not take it, a total dick.
  11. Ted D
    11. Posted by Ted D Thu Oct 22, 2009 8:45 am EDT

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    Joe you still pissing on your balls son.
  12. Jersey Guy
    12. Posted by Jersey Guy Thu Oct 22, 2009 8:46 am EDT

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    I'm not going to go as far as James and say I started to like Rashaad because I still see some unncecessary cockiness in his work but I am beginning to really really dislike Rampage from this. Maybe the UFC will understand that not every fighter can coach. Those who can't teach, do. Those who can't do, teach.
  13. Wreckinball
    13. Posted by Wreckinball Thu Oct 22, 2009 8:50 am EDT

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    Got a win?
  14. Patrón
    14. Posted by Patrón Thu Oct 22, 2009 8:50 am EDT

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    [profane] is acting like a punk. Rashad is definitely coming across better. This season sucks, time to end the show, or change the format. None of these guys have any chance in the UFC, maybe Roy
  15. Rob R
    15. Posted by Rob R Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:24 am EDT

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    Jeez, Jayyolf...this isn't a video game when you can just hit the right button and get out of the triangle. If it was locked in, it was locked in...give some credit to Darrill. Also give credit to Zak for lasting that long without submitting, and for trying to punch his way out of it. He was actually landing some decent hammerfists in there.
    At least you recognize that it's only the first round, and we shouldn't necessarily expect an epic battle. I mean...people don't even tune in to see North Carolina demolish Southwest Tennessee State Tech. Other than McSweeney, the winners in the first round have fought well. I expect a good second round.
    Unlike you guys, I don't weep for the heavyweight division. Keep in mind that maybe three guys from this season will ever have more than a couple fights in UFC going forward, and maybe one or two could contend for a title down the line. A lot of these guys are also pretty young. I think Wren is like 22, Schoon is 24. There's plenty of potential there.
    Namath...Pac and Cotto are fighting at 145-ish. Look at Mike Brown, Urijah Faber, Joe Warren, etc. to see what an MMA 145 pounder. Then look at Cris Arreola to see what an elite boxing heavyweight can look like.
  16. Rob R
    16. Posted by Rob R Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:27 am EDT

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    Cagewriter: For all of our sakes, please open a thread where Joe, Allen, and Ted can just rail on one another in isolation.
  17. Maggie Hendricks
    17. Posted by Maggie Hendricks Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:36 am EDT

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    I've been thinking about doing that, Rob, or just deleting all of their comments. I don't delete comments very often, but the personal attacks are getting out of hand. Stop acting like children, please. Use the comment section to do that -- comment on the stories, discuss the news, etc. Stop using the comment section to show so much hatred, please.
  18. Rob R
    18. Posted by Rob R Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:42 am EDT

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    ...unlike boxing fanboys, all of whom I'm sure could step in a cage and mop the floor with Zak Jensen or Abe Wagner.
    At least be consistent, Joe.
    And as far as "ringing true for most mma fighters," you don't hear a whole lot of MMA fighters railing on boxing. Certainly not as much as you hear boxers (Mayweather and Hopkins especially) railing on MMA.
  19. Ted D
    19. Posted by Ted D Thu Oct 22, 2009 9:58 am EDT

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    Joe if you think that was good boxing I feel sorry for you. The last good fight was Pacman vs anyone of his fights. Mag's there is no hate I just want to spar with someone of Joe's level of boxing. But I will stop if it makes everyone happy. Joe is scared anyway, And on another note I am immature.
  20. BNG
    20. Posted by BNG Thu Oct 22, 2009 10:17 am EDT

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    Maggie, I appreciate you chiming in about policing the threads. But, I say let those guys rant. You can edit their profanity, their biggoted jibes, and their sexual references, but post them. We can police our own on here, too. Every time someone spouts off about boxing vs. MMA, etc. there are even more of us who can shut him/her down. More often than not we ignore their excrement. But, when we feel obligated to confront them, we tend to do it with tact and use defensible arguement and facts to show them that their viewpoint is skewed. Oh, then we direct them to the boxing tab on the top of the page.
  21. Rob R
    21. Posted by Rob R Thu Oct 22, 2009 10:23 am EDT

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    BNG...I agree in principle, but it just gets annoying to have to sift through 30-40% of the posts on here to find anything with substance.
    I don't mind that they post on here. When they're on topic, they have something to say...whether we agree or not. There's just no need for us to have to comb through 5-7 consecutive posts about their alleged lifestyles in order to get to an opinion about MMA, or even boxing.
  22. BNG
    22. Posted by BNG Thu Oct 22, 2009 10:24 am EDT

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    Great stuff, Allen. Guess I can keep my '73 Olds up on blocks in my front yard and feel proud. It gives my five hound dogs a place to get out of the rain.
  23. Ted D
    23. Posted by Ted D Thu Oct 22, 2009 10:27 am EDT

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    Last night before the fight when they were in the dressingroom, Rampage should of been giving advice about the fight. But instead he just kept saying you don't want to lose to Titties. He got Titties. Come on Bumpage, give some advice that will work in the cage. Rampage and I are both immature.

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