A very special holiday edition of the Fantasy Freak Show is now available, thanks to the kind folks at The Score WSCR-AM 670. Gather your family 'round the laptop and give it a listen. All the Week 12 matchups were discussed, all questions were answered. (Except Omar's. He bailed).

Please click. There's a marshmallow in every spoonful…

Fantasy Freak Show, Part 1 (Thanksgiving injuries, Rock Cartwright(notes), Andre the Giant)

Fantasy Freak Show, Part 2 (Andre's filmography, buncha games) 

Fantasy Freak Show, Part 3 (More Andre, late games, endless calls)

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Photo via Getty Images

You'll find our deadly accurate Week 12 ranks below, in the traditional Arcade spreadsheet colors (black, gray, mouthwash blue). Most serious fantasy matchups will be decided on Monday night when New England visits New Orleans. All other games are merely appetizers.

Thursday's menu features a big pile of ick (GB at DET, OAK at DAL, NYG at DEN), but it's obviously not without fantasy merit. Let's rank, then discuss…

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The market for bootleg fantasy videos is out of control. Profits are threatened. In fact, according to recent FSTA estimates, the fantasy industry lost tens of billions of dollars in 2008 due to the illegal distribution of pirated sit/start videos. True fact.

Please, stop buying low-resolution fantasy DVDs from the dude at the expressway exit. You'll find video of the highest quality (and the usual sketchy advice) right here...

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Almost went with Rams WR Brandon Gibson(notes) there, following the 17-target week. But he wasn't exactly sure-handed in Week 11 and Kyle Boller(notes) will be his quarterback on Sunday. 

Here's your Eagles-Bears recap in 100 words or less, because the blogger would like to move on. L'Ours est mort. Vive l'Ours!

Jay Cutler threw four fewer interceptions in Week 11 than he did in Week 10, but Chicago finished on a disturbingly similar note. Cutler's final pass was picked, guaranteeing a four-point loss. He overthrew Greg Olsen, Devin Hester and Johnny Knox on routes that should have gone for touchdowns. Eagles RB LeSean McCoy had an excellent game (20-99-1), despite losing a fumble. DeSean Jackson scored again from 40-plus. Asante Samuel suffered a stinger that requires an MRI. The turf was in terrible shape for no obvious reason. For the fifth time this season, Matt Forte gained less than 3.0 YPC. 

There. Hope you learned something. Let's bullet…

Steve Slaton will start for Houston on Monday night against the Titans. For now, Ryan Moats returns to the sideline. You probably won't believe this, but Slaton fumbled twice against Tennessee back in Week 2 and he ran for just 2.0 yards per carry. [Houston Chronicle]

Ladell Betts reportedly tore both his ACL and MCL in the loss to Dallas, ending his season after a pair of useful games. Clinton Portis (concussion) is not expected to be active in Week 12, so veteran Rock Cartwright becomes the week's most obvious fantasy pickup. Expect Washington to add some uninteresting depth at running back this week. [Adam Schefter]

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If you've invested in the Indianapolis offense this season, Sunday was a terrible day. Miserable. It might have been the worst day of your fantasy year.

That's not to say that you lost your Week 11 matchup, of course. The Colts' skill position players all delivered acceptable lines in the win against the Ravens. Peyton Manning threw for 299 yards, Dallas Clark and Joseph Addai each scored touchdowns and Reggie Wayne finished with seven receptions for 89 yards. 

But we also moved a few steps closer to the nightmare scenario pictured above: Manning on the sidelines with a headset in Week 16.

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Ricky Williams is clearly possessed. Probably by an ancient Hittite demigod. Williams nearly reached his age (32) in fantasy points on Thursday night in a three-touchdown performance against the Panthers. He carried 22 times for 119 yards and added two receptions for 19.

It was a dominant performance from Williams, highlighted by a 46-yard fourth quarter TD run. Video here via NFL.com. After a slight miscalculation by Carolina linebacker Jon Beason, Williams legitimately outran a pair of NFL corners on his way to the goal line for his third score

Ricky is not to be benched for the foreseeable future, not with Ronnie Brown on IR. Williams was No. 6 in the Yahoo! composite running back rankings this week, and he'll likely be higher in Week 12. (And by "higher" we mean, you know, in the ranks). Miami travels to Buffalo next Sunday to face the NFL's worst run defense.

Lex Hilliard looked strong as well. He picked up 31 total yards on six touches and lost a 13-yard gain due to a penalty. If you're handcuffing Ricky – or simply looking for a desperation flex option in a giant league – Hilliard is your guy. Pat White was only a rumor on Thursday.

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REMINDER: The deadline to make trades in public leagues is Friday, November 20. After that date, you won't be able to get Smoot On A Boat to deal Beanie Wells, even if he finally agrees that TJ Houshmandzadeh is fair compensation. Act now! 

Larry Johnson practiced with the Bengals for the first time on Wednesday. He'll reportedly be active on Sunday if Cedric Benson (hip) can't go, though Bernard Scott and Brian Leonard are expected to get more touches. Benson reportedly did not dress for Thursday's practice.

Everyone seems to be using the word "guarded" to describe Benson's reaction to the LJ signing, but really, his comments seem reasonable and harmless:

Benson was guarded in his first comments since Johnson joined the team. He said that he realizes that football can be more of a business than a game.

"I didn't know I was supposed to be jumping out of my seat or anything. I really have no feelings about it," Benson said. "They made a move they felt they needed to do, and that's fine with me. It's not going to affect me in any kind of way. Whatever happens from here on, I can guarantee you I'll definitely be making the best of it.

"In most cases you hold your fate in your own hands. I'm not letting up in any aspect of what I'm doing. I would imagine that I would continue to be the first guy, and if not, I'll make it that way."

That seems OK. Nothing to see there. Unless of course LJ finds the end zone against the Raiders, which isn't all that far-fetched. If that happens, we'll need to reevaluate Cedric's mood.

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No byes this week, so no excuses. Today we're only accepting complaints from people who own Michael Turner (high ankle sprain), Ronnie Brown (foot/ankle) and Cedric Benson (hip).

It's not as if Brian Westbrook (concussion), Julius Jones (lung) or Dwayne Bowe (unwanted pounds) were carrying your fantasy team anyway.

Please enjoy the preliminary Week 11 ranks, free of charge…

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For approximately 56 minutes of game time, the Patriots controlled their Sunday night matchup against Indianapolis. They led 34-21 with 4:12 remaining in the fourth quarter following Stephen Gostkowski's 36-yard field goal. 

And then a strange alliance formed between Colts quarterback Peyton Manning and Patriots head coach Bill Belichick. Manning directed a pair of touchdown drives, the second of which was set up by an odd decision from Belichick.

Faced with a fourth-and-2 at the New England 28 with 2:08 on the clock, Belichick decided to go for a first down…which no one does, ever. If his team would have punted and done it reasonably well, Indianapolis would have needed to cover perhaps 70-75 yards in their final possession.

Instead, after Tom Brady's pass to Kevin Faulk resulted in only a 1-yard gain, the Patriots gave the ball to Manning at the 29, just outside the red zone. Peyton completed a 15-yard pass to Reggie Wayne, then handed off to Joseph Addai for 13. At that point, with the ball at the goal line, the Colts began running time off the clock. Manning eventually hit Wayne for a 1-yard score (beautiful catch) and Matt Stover's extra point was good, leaving the Pats with a one-point deficit and not nearly enough time.

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That's Jacksonville running back Maurice Jones-Drew pictured above, ruining your fantasy week near the end of a 123-yard rushing performance.

The Jaguars trailed the Jets 22-21 late in the fourth quarter, but they had the ball at New York's 10-yard line. A field goal from that distance is basically a layup. The game clock was at 1:48. The Jets were without timeouts. Jones-Drew took the handoff from quarterback David Garrard and ran up the middle…where he was met with no resistance whatsoever.

New York's defense moved at half-speed, conceding the touchdown. The Jets were in an odd game-management situation in which they needed Jacksonville to score quickly, having no other way to stop the clock. Rather than accommodate them, Jones-Drew took a knee at the 1-yard line, declining the TD. You'll find the highlight here beginning at the 1:45 mark.

Jets corners Darrelle Revis and Lito Sheppard did everything possible to allow MJD to score, short of actually carrying him over the goal line on their shoulders. By kneeling at the one, Jones-Drew allowed the Jaguars to run the clock down to the final tick and then kick a 21-yard field goal.

"Brilliant!" said the announcers.

"Brilliant!" said the five people who actually cheer for the Jaguars.

"[EXPLETIVE]!" said those of us who needed six more points from MJD.

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