Imagine the most wooden of athlete performances on "Saturday Night Live" combined with the worst of sketch-writing from "MadTV" and you'll be better prepared to watch this four-minute Halloween clip starring Kris Jenkins and various children dressed as NFL figures that appeared on Sunday's "NFL Today."
1. This was so rough that the laugh-happy "NFL Today" could barely muster chuckles when the segment ended. It was the John Beck of sketches: The problem isn't that it was awful, it's that anyone ever thought it wouldn't be.
2. How did they get Bill Parcells to loan his old Phil Simms dartboard?
3. They cast the big kid as Norv Turner and the little one as Rex Ryan? Also, the Andy Reid fat joke felt mean.
4. Mini Dan Marino, for the win:
5. All right, the A.J. Hawk joke in the middle wasn't bad.