Again, we start with the honorable mentions ...
Michael G. was using the computer in his boss's office to try to buy tickets for the Music City Miracle game. The boss caught him and ordered him to leave, but then his boss left the room first. Michael G. locked the door behind him, went back to the computer, and bought two tickets for $36. His boss, meanwhile, called the police, had Michael G. thrown into the street, and fired him.
Matthew W. was one of five people who wanted one playoff ticket in the possession of a friend. To determine who get the ticket, the friend staged a Beer Olympics. Near the end of the competition, Matthew W. raised a near-empty keg above his head and jumped off of a two-story porch. He crashed landed, the keg landed on him, he rolled down a hill, broke his arm, cracked his head open, and then had the keg roll into his head. He used his good arm to pump more beer from the keg, drink that with a combination of blood and win the competition.
Mondo used to go to Raiders games in the '70s, and he and twenty like-minded acquaintances would all decide to jump the fence at the same time to get into the game. Two or three would always get caught. Mondo took a few beatings from police, but says it was worth it for all the free games he attended.
atl654 ran into a scalper who wanted $350 for a ticket. atl654 instead handed the man $100 and a few bills leftover from a trip to Ecuador. The scalper never checked. Note: I do not recommend trying this at home. Most scalpers check, and would not appreciate such a move.
BigBlue, a Giants fan, was promised two Eagles/Giants tickets if he got an Eagles tattoo on one arm, and a Cowboys star on the other. He did it. BigBlue has since had them altered and/or covered up.
Adam L. wanted to go to a Chiefs/Broncos showdown when both teams were 4-0. In line for the bathroom at a bar, he yelled out, "Anyone have a ticket to the game this weekend?" And he found a group of four Canadians that used to be a group of five Canadians, with one of them being stopped at the border because of previous drug charges. The next morning, one of the Canadians in question was wearing only tighty whities, and another was wearing a Steve Bono jersey.
Sean M. drove 28 hours in a period of 48 hours to see a Bears game.
trojan37's friend, for some reason, told trojan37 that if he got a vasectomy, he'd give him a ticket to the NFC Championship game between the Packers and Giants. He did. I think that's probably best for all of us.
And your winners ...
Raider Fan's friend won a limo ride and two tickets to a game, and even though he didn't get one of those tickets, Raider Fan did partake in the limo ride to the stadium. Once there, he drank. Drank to the point of vomiting. He begged for tickets. A couple told him that if he'd eat a handful of his own puke, they'd give him a ticket. He did. They did. Raider Fan, everybody.
Steve Patriot's not-so-nice Uncle Jim had three tickets to a Rams game, and four people who wanted to go: Steve, Steve's dad, Uncle Jim, and Uncle Jim's son, who has mental retardation. Steve was originally the odd man out, until he played on his cousin's love for Superman, and convinced the child that playing Superman 64 was a better way to spend his time than going to a Rams/Seahawks playoff game. To quote Steve himself, "I successfully manipulated my mentally retarded cousin into giving up his playoffs tickets." Congratulations. Enjoy Hell.
I am well aware that I am not honoring good people here. But I think Steve Patriot deserves something for even admitting to what he did. And as for Raider Fan ... I don't know. I just feel bad, because I doubt there are many people in life who are ever going to give you anything.
Winners, please e-mail me with your favorite team, shoe size, and mailing address. Please do so from the Yahoo! ID with which you used to post.
Oh, and Danielle - No, I never did get your information from the last Crocs giveaway. Please send it again. email@example.com.