Whatever else you think of 'em, you have to agree Jets fans are photo-friendly (Getty Images)

The Juggernaut Index is our annual preseason ranking of NFL teams for fantasy purposes. Repeat: FANTASY PURPOSES. Here, we care primarily about yards and points. We’re not forecasting wins and losses. This isn’t your standard NFL power ranking. If a team’s roster features multiple upper-tier fantasy assets, that group will rank near the top of the J.I. If instead a team features nothing but fantasy drek, you’ll find ‘em near the bottom. Make sense? Great. Really, the J.I. is just a gimmick, a way to deliver team-by-team fantasy spin.

In the six years that I’ve been producing the Juggernaut Index for Yahoo!, there has never been a more obvious choice for No. 32. This year’s version of the New York Jets is painfully light on talent at the skill spots, and the team’s presumptive starting quarterback is kind of a walking plague. Let’s just try to get this big green [expletive] pile out of the way quickly, so we can get to the useful teams.

The Jets will have their third offensive coordinator in as many seasons, as Marty Mornhinweg joined the coaching staff back in January. Mornhinweg will either need to resuscitate the career of Mark Sanchez — somehow turning a reckless, scattershot passer into a competent West Coast quarterback — or he’ll need to get second-round rookie Geno Smith up to speed in a hurry. Both of those tasks seem difficult.

The Saves Index is a ranking of the top 50 relievers, based solely on their potential to earn saves from the present through the remainder of the season. In a case where two relievers have similar saves potential, the additional standard roto categories will be used to differentiate them. For relievers on this list that don't currently have a closer role, they are ranked by the likelihood of ascending to their team's closer role because of the volatility of the team's current closer.

View Consensus Rankings from FantasyPros

Doug Martin, top-of-draft fantasy asset (Getty)

As most of you know, playing in a fantasy league alongside real-life fantasy experts is a hopeless undertaking. HOPELESS. Zero probability of success. Like challenging a group of bears to a moose-eating contest. Not recommended. You couldn't possibly win. You'd be humiliated. And lucky to survive.

I mean ... we're experts. We only get these jobs because we've each won thousands of leagues, beating tens of thousands of regular humans like yourself.

So please, don't think for an instant that you can handle any of us. I doubt you'd even win a fantasy medal. Spare yourself the embarrassment. Stay away. That's the best advice I can give you.

But still, for whatever reason, some of you seem to think you could hold your own in a league filled with accredited fantasy professionals. Because you're delusional. Thus, the Roto Arcade Pro-Am was created.

Brandon League, still a problem (Getty)Brandon League was asked to protect a two-run lead against Arizona on Monday night, and it did not go well. He faced seven Diamondbacks hitters, five of whom reached base. By the time League's night had ended, he'd allowed four hits, one walk and four runs. He was booed lustily by the home crowd, and then Dodgers manager Don Mattingly was booed, um ... lustilier.

It was not a feel-good night in L.A.

League has pitched a total of 24.0 innings this season, posting miserable ratios (6.00 ERA, 1.46 WHIP). He's blown four save opportunities so far and allowed at least one run in 11 of his 24 appearances. His K/9 is just 4.88, one of the lowest rates in baseball. He is pretty clearly not a closing-quality reliever at this stage. No other active Dodgers pitcher has an ERA above 3.90, so it's tough to argue that the team lacks alternatives.

Kenley Jansen remains one of baseball's premier set-up relievers, and Mattingly deployed him in the eighth on Monday, against Arizona's 2-3-4 hitters.

Gerrit Cole, RHP of interest (Getty Images)

OK, prospectors, it sounds like we're finally going to get a look at Pittsburgh's Gerrit Cole and New York's Zack Wheeler. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

According to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette's Michael Sanserino, Cole is likely to debut on Tuesday against the Giants. The 22-year-old right-hander could potentially get a two-start week, with the Puigs Dodgers on deck next Sunday. (Depends a bit on the availability of Wandy Rodriguez, currently dealing with forearm inflammation.)

Cole was the No. 1 pick in the 2011 MLB draft, and he's impressed this season at Triple-A. He entered the year rated as a top-10 prospect on pretty much everyone's board, then validated the hype by delivering a 2.91 ERA and 1.06 WHIP over 12 starts at Indianapolis. He hasn't allowed a run, earned or unearned, in either of his last two starts. Cole's strikeout-rate isn't top-tier (47 in 68.0 IP), so we can't say he's been completely overpowering. But in 2012, he struck out 136 batters in 132.0 innings across three minor league levels. This is a pitcher with an obvious chance to stick, worthy of attention in mixed leagues.

Ryan Braun, perhaps facing a loooonng suspension (Getty Images)

Yeah, this news is gonna leave a mark on your fantasy roster: According to a report from ESPN's "Outside the Lines," Major League Baseball is preparing to suspend a significant number of players — perhaps 20 or more — connected to the Biogenesis PED scandal, including Ryan Braun, Nelson Cruz and Alex Rodriguez.

Tony Bosch, founder of Biogenesis, has reportedly agreed to cooperate with MLB's investigation. That is to say, he's going to name names — and several of the names are BIG.

In addition to Braun, Cruz and A-Rod, the following players have been tied to Biogenesis: Everth Cabrera, Melky Cabrera, Francisco Cervelli, Bartolo Colon, Fautino de los Santos, Yasmani Grandal, Fernando Martinez, Jesus Montero, and Jhonny Peralta. Other players are no doubt involved, but haven't yet been identified. Gio Gonzalez is also among those linked to the clinic, although reports suggest he may have only received legal substances. Robinson Cano has been connected to Biogenesis indirectly, through an employee of his foundation. (Cano is also besties with Melky, for whatever that's worth.)

So this is a big, steaming fantasy mess. If 20-plus players are indeed involved, then we're looking at maybe 1,000 total games lost due to suspension. Perhaps more. Without a single positive test result. This is a PED scandal unlike any other.

Wil Myers, beginning to rake (USAT Images)

Just a few short weeks ago, Rays prospect Wil Myers was undeniably struggling. His batting average sat below .250, and the power numbers were nothin' special. Myers wasn't exactly building a strong call-up case.

And then the assault began. Myers has pummeled International League pitching in recent days, with little mercy. Over his last 10 games, he's gone 18-for-44 with 11 extra-base hits (six homers included), and he's driven in a ridiculous 21 runs.

Last Tuesday, he hit a fourth-deck moonshot that is believed to be the longest blast in the history of home runs Durham Bulls Athletic Park.

On Sunday, he delivered a near-cycle in a win against Scranton/Wilkes-Barre, clearing the fence for the tenth time this season in a 3-for-4 performance. Myers has multiple hits in six of his last eight games, raising his slash-line to a respectable. 280/.358/.500. He's available in 73 percent of Yahoo! leagues at the moment, so most of you can stash him now for later use.

Jose Reyes (Getty Images)

When last we saw Jays shortstop Jose Reyes, he was being carted off the field in Kansas City, his left ankle heavily bandaged. He'd rolled his foot badly on an attempted steal, sliding awkwardly into second base. It was a nasty injury (clip here), obviously serious, and Reyes soon hit the 60-day DL. He reportedly heard a pop, which is never a good thing.

At the time of the injury, I would not have bet on seeing Reyes back in action before the All-Star break. But he shed his walking boot in mid-May, he was cleared to run a week ago, and it sounds like he'll begin a rehab assignment shortly.