The X Change Rate: Monique Heart
In "The X Change Rate," award-winning drag queen, entertainer and TV personality Monét X Change brings her signature wit, heart and style to BUILD Series. Joining the lovely host in this week's episode were drag queen Monique Heart and Pam Wiznitzer for Cocktails with Pam.
Video Transcript
[MUSIC PLAYING]
MONÉT X CHANGE: Hey, y'all. It's your girl, Monét, and welcome back to "The X Change Rate," the corner of the internet where we believe that the line, I want to gag, I want to choke, I want you to touch that little dangly thing that swing in the back of my throat, undoubtedly deserves a Pulitzer. Of course, we're bringing y'all another brand new show with a guest I absolutely adore. And she has so much personality, we just couldn't imagine splitting her time with anyone else, so the stunning Monique Heart is finally here. But first, let's get up in the gig. Hit it!
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Yeah, we play The Gig Music because in the comments people were saying, they keep on cutting the music. They're cutting the music. So we let it play a little there. You happy? The internet is never happy. I don't know why I'm asking. But yeah, something really weird happened to me over the weekend. Obviously, we know like the census is going on, and like the census people came to my door. And I say people, like, I don't think it's like the government was trying to get me. It was one lady.
So she came to my door-- I didn't know it was her. My door-- it was a knock, then a really aggressive doorbell ring. I was like, all right, calm down. I'm coming. And I open the door and she's like, oh my god, Monét X Change? And I was like, whoa, this is very strange, who are you? And she was like, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. It was really unprofessional. It's me-- bleep her name-- from the census. I'm just here to take your census, but like I love you so much. I watched you all in season 10, I watched you on All Stars 4, I'm watching you in the bathroom right now on my camera.
I have a secret camera to your bathroom! She was like really strange. She was like, I love "Sibling Rivalry." The last episode, girl, it was so funny. When you-- I was like, this is really weird. And she's like listing off like all this stuff. But she's like, but anyway, I'm here for your census. And we did the whole census thing. But it was like just really strange that someone who was a big fan of mine just happened to get me.
Y'all know she was looking through her thing, her list, and she's like, oh, Kevin Bertin, Monét X Change, I'm doing this house. And so it was a little weird, but thank you so much, my dear, and you were very sweet. And don't do anything weird in the next couple coming months or years, or however long I'm at this apartment. But also like triggered me. Because that's how "The Killer" starts.
Like, I watch a lot of Lifetime, and this is literally the plot point of a Lifetime movie. Someone came to do my census, they find out who I am, and they wait for me as I'm going out at 2:00 in the morning to get Doritos for the corner store. And she clonks me over the head with a whatever, and then she drags me to my apartment and she like cuts me up limb by limb. Like that is a fucking Lifetime movie. I'm a little nervous.
So if I go disappearing in the next couple days-- well she'd probably take. She won't do to the next couple days because that'll be really obvious. She might do it like the next couple months. Anyway, just remember this story so y'all can corroborate with me. Yadda, yadda, yadda. I also got a really strange love letter from a fan, which I want to read, because this is like this guy's third or fourth letter, I think, he sent to me. I've lost track at this point.
But it's very interesting, and it's like, oh, people. Like stop the weird shit. I need to find this letter. Oh! So the subject is, "Oh My Godd," with two Ds. Monét, I want to lick your right hand tattoo all over your beautiful arm stretch marks while I suck your tongue saliva and I put your feet between my cock. Oh my god, babe. Red sweating emoji, green heart. Sent from my iPhone. So he has an iPhone, so that's a plus. I'm not saying no completely! I got into it. Because like, a grown man who has that much access to their creativity, like, that's kind of hot, and it's very endearing.
And also like I want a boyfriend who's like into me more than I'm into them, you know what I mean? Like I want a boyfriend who like fucking stalks me, is like obsessed with me, but not like a crazy census lady way, you know what I mean? I don't know if that's a really weird thing, but I'm kind of into it, and it works. So whoever you are, send me a picture. Should I say his name or is that rude? I shouldn't say his name. Yeah, I'm not going to say his name.
But ZG are the initials. So, I'm interested. I'm kidding. Don't fucking send me anything. It's fucking weird. This is the fourth letter, stop it. I'm also--
[LAUGH]
Thinking about stalking, I am stalking this presidential election, because it is crazy. Because as we know, a lot is at stake, and you know, we're all trying and fighting to make good decisions so that we end up with a great presidency. And, we know, this past week Biden announced that Kamala Harris is his running mate. And I think that--
- [INAUDIBLE]
MONÉT X CHANGE: Huh?
- It's Kamala.
MONÉT X CHANGE: You know what? I say Kamala, people say Kamala. Does she--
- It's Kamala.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Does she say Kamala?
- She says, um, pause before you say it, because there's a comma before it.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, comma, like comma.
- Pause before you say it, because it's a comma. Kamala.
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK, Kamala. I like Kamala. She sounds like-- I think Kamala is fierce. It sounds like a Mortal Kombat character, Kamala. Finish him. You know? It's very that. Anyway, so Kamala is his running mate, and I-- I-- I am here for it. I think she has some-- of course, people are trying to make it seem like our politicians strive for sainthood. And the reality of the world is, there is no perfect candidate. No candidate is perfect. No candidate is completely clean. They all have things they could have done better or changed or whatever, whatever, whatever.
But at the end of the day, this is our only choice to get rid of a total totalitarian dictatorship. This is our only choice to eradicate the virus that is Trump, so I am behind Biden and Harris 159,000 percent. That being said, she's already making good decisions. She is electing Karine Jean-Pierre as a chief of staff. Great, great, great move. First of all, she's a woman. First of all, she's queer. Third of all, she's a lesbian. We're getting a-- sorry.
First of all, she's black. Two, she's a woman. Three, she's queer. But like we're getting a queer black lesbian as the chief of staff of the vice president of the United States? Bitch, we are in the motherfucking room, honey. I will say, to be fair, I had never heard of Karine before this, but her pedigree is fierce. Her roots have been in politics for a really, really, really long time. She's an organizer. She's an MSNBC political analyst. She served as a deputy battleground states director for the Obama presidency into 2012, his reelection campaign.
She served as a regional political director of the White House Office for Political Affairs. She worked on the Obama for America campaign in 2000, so his first year trying to win the presidency, which he won. She worked on the southeast regional political region. And she teaches at Columbia University, which yesterday I was biking, there was this really, really, really hot guy jogging through Columbia. I'm assuming he goes there. I'm thinking he was a lawyer, because his stride was very like dominant feeling. Whatever.
Anyway, that's beside the point. Yeah, so she's a black woman, she was born in Martinique, but her parents are Haitian. And yeah, she was raised in New York, in Queens. Southside Jamaica, Queens. I don't know if it was Southside, but in my mind for Karine's origin story, she was raised in Southside Jamaica, Queens. Her and Nicki Minaj went to the same high school but they just had different paths, you know what I mean? And she credits her parents with her own success in politics.
She said, my dad is 70 but still drives a cab. My mom's a home health care worker. And they come from a country that is impoverished, but left to go to America to get a better life for their kids. For them, they are so proud of me, and they feel that they've reached their dreams because of her successes. But without them I wouldn't be where I am. They told me I could be whatever I wanted to be, do whatever I wanted to do, and those are beautiful words by her parents.
And yeah, like, obviously she's not someone new to politics. She's been working in politics since 2008, probably before I'm assuming. And having a black, queer, lesbian as Kamala's VP is great. Again, what you want is a seat at the table so you can help inform and make decisions, you know what I mean? So I think this is great. We already have a black woman. Now we have a queer black woman. Bitches, we only going up from here. Who is next?
Bitch! OK, let me tell you, if Biden really want to fucking get with it 2020-- 202012? 2020. We need to have trans representation in the Oval Office in some capacity. I don't know what it would be, but mama, that to me-- well, the deal is already sealed. But that will be the icing. That'll be the buttercream icing on this red velvet cake to sweeten the deal all the more for me. So yeah. Actually fierce.
Oh! This little bit, if you remember, Kamala did an event and Karine was interviewing her. Then this white dude just jumps on stage, and like wants to like-- almost like he was about to attack. Karine literally shielded Kamala, not knowing if this man had a gun, a knife, whatever. And she was like, no. It was very Whoopi, in "Color Purple," no! Like everything you've done by me, white mother fucker, I'm about to get you.
So she's fierce, she's a warrior, and I think this is what we need, the representation we need. And get it, girl. Whoo! Something I'm not getting into is "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air." Now hold on. The reboot. So if y'all don't know, a few-- last year in March, a director named Morgan Cooper-- I sound really congested today, right?
- Yeah.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Can you hear it?
[SNIFFLING]
Y'all hear that?
[COUGH]
What's going on? It's not [? Colleen. ?] Don't say-- it's not [? Colleen. ?] It happens to a lot of people in the summer. Anyway, last year in March 2019, Morgan Cooper, who is a film director, he directed this beautiful short film-esque like-- well, it's a short. It's not a trailer, it's a short. It was like four minutes long about this like dramatic Fresh Prince reboot. I saw it. And y'all know the original "Fresh Prince of Bel-Air," which aired from like, I want to say '89 until '97, something like that? I am bastardizing it, probably.
But the original show was light hearted, was funny. Yes, they had serious moments. Like when Bill Vereen? Ben Vereen? Anyway, the guy who played Will Smith's father comes back into his life, and he like abandons him again. He like pretends to be involved or something, but he like leaves again. And Will has this like really, really-- I mean, honestly, it's to me one of the best moments in sitcom history, ever. And it's like really dramatic, and Will's acting is so good.
If you're black, you've seen this. If you're white, probably not. And it's like beautiful. It's so, just, mwah! Also, can we get into these nails? So I've got these nails done. And so right here you think, oh my god, she's classy. She's business. Oh my god, just a long little manicure. Nothing's weird here. And then sha-blam, girl! She comes in with the deception, honey. So I got these nails done. Jenny Bui did these for me.
Well, she did them for-- I got them by her. And they were like this white girl do, and I was like, huh uh. So I went to my other nail lady, who's closer to my house, and she gave me the black girl do, with this like little peekaboo, Tiffany Blue color. Fabulous. I feel fierce. That's besides the point. Can we show the clip of the-- here's a clip from the reboot dramatic short of
"Fresh Prince of Bel-Air." So you see it? It's really dramatic, right? And call me selfish, but I'm not into it. I'm not, not, not, not-not-not not into it. It's too dramatic. It's too serious. And like the original sitcom was so light hearted. It was so fun. It was so effortless. This feels like-- and I get it. 2020, we're in a different place for a lot of people. Life is just different and I get the need to want to go that way.
But I feel like just a few days ago I had this like moment. Like, everything I was reading was so heavy and so depressing, and I was just really feeling stifled. Just like everything on TV doesn't need to reflect that, too. And I get the need to want to do that, but I feel like we can reboot the show and just keep it lighthearted and fun with those little tidbits of serious, not the whole thing being so heavy and so dramatic, you know what I mean? And I don't know, call me crazy. Like what do you guys think?
Like I feel like if they went in more of like a "Blackish" approach? Because "Blackish" is a great show that keeps it light and fun and buoyant, but having moments of the serious when needed, you know what I mean? It doesn't need to be so heavy and so dramatic. Don't get me wrong, it's shot beautifully and it looks amazing, but I just can't take anymore heavy, weighted stuff. Like this is so crazy. And supposedly it's still going to be fun, but I don't-- hood bitches love saying supposably. It's supposedly. Am I saying it right? I don't even know.
Supposably it's going to be light hearted fun, but honestly it doesn't look that. But networks are already vying for it. Peacock, which is NBC's streaming platform, because you know they had the peacock? NBC. Which by the way is a major six, did you know that? N--B. That's a major six, if you're a musician. NBC, Netflix, and HBO Max, all the streaming platforms, are like bidding for the shell to want to get it. And HBO Max already shows the original show, but it was made on NBC back in the day. So we'll see who gets it.
Will Smith is onboard, Quincy Jones is onboard. Benny Medina. If you don't nobody Benny Medina, he was Tyra Banks's manager. He was one of the creative minds behind "Top Model" back in the day. And Andy and Susan Borowitz, they're the creators of the show. They're going to return as executive producers. But they're not going to get rid of Morgan. Morgan is the one who rebooted the short, and he is going to correct the script and direct and co-executive produce alongside the showrunner, Chris Collins.
So you look at stuff like that. They love to see that and be like, this is great, and then like chop the person who incited all of this new flame for the show. So they're keeping him onboard, which is nice. And yeah, the reboots are entirely [INAUDIBLE]. Everything is getting remade and rebooted, because you have a built in audience. Like, there is a segment of people you know who are going to tune in, and probably more because of the nostalgia of it, you know? So there's a built in audience, a built in demo.
So we'll see what goes on with it. I just want it to be more like the original and more fun than so serious. AMC, girl. AMC. Now that lots of things have been re-opening-- which they teased New York. Governor Cuomo-- which I'm so sick of Governor Cuomo and de Blasio constantly measuring their fucking dicks to see who's smells the worst. Like, they're just so fucking annoying. Cuomo is like, yes, New York City gyms can reopen at 33.33 percent capacity. Capacity? Capacity.
I mean, then de Blasio was like, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on. They're probably not going to be open on the 24th. We're taking care of schools and children first, and we're going to make sure that's fine before the gyms and stuff. Which I get it, but I think not going to the gym is contributing to my mental thing. I just feel so crazy. So hopefully gyms open the 24th, but that's beside the point. AMC theaters, across America and the world, are starting to reopen. And on their opening weekend, they're saying tickets will be $0.15. $0.15 to go to AMC.
Because 100 years ago that was the cost, which-- AMC was open 100 years ago? How old is AMC? AMC was over 100 years ago, girl.
- Mhm.
MONÉT X CHANGE: That's wild. I didn't know that. I thought--
- [INAUDIBLE] know been around.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right. What in the world? Did we have the technology 100 years ago? Like who was back there in the booth like roll-- who was on that? That's another job that was probably popular back then, but now it's obsolete because we got machines doing everything. Anyway, that's beside the point. They're opening on-- well, let me just say, there's a hole to do. So August 20th they're looking to open 100 locations. And by September 3rd they want to open 2/3 of the 600 plus theaters they have open in the States.
But here's the thing. The ones that are opening on August 20th, they're not showing anything new, because there is nothing new to show. They're going to show like really big blockbusters like "Star Wars" and "Black Panther," so stuff that's already out. But I mean, who's going to pass up a $0.15-- I'm not saying $15, y'all. $0.15, which is one--
- Nobody even has $0.15.
MONÉT X CHANGE: What do you mean?
- Where are you going to find $0.15? Who has change?
[LAUGH]
MONÉT X CHANGE: $0.15! But also you could just like buy out-- like a bitch like me would just buy out a whole lot. Because they're also going to recognize social distancing, so the seats probably will be right next to each other, but they probably have to like-- they're probably four or three seats apart, I'm guessing. But I would just spend like 20 bucks. How much is-- hey, Siri? 20 divided by 15 is 1.3, which means 130 tickets. Bitch, I'll just buy $20, that's going to be 130 tickets. Like what? Like I would just buy the whole theater for me and my friends and we go [? keke ?] and have a good time.
But there's probably some rules. I'm sure there's a way to combat. They've thought about that, I'm hoping. But, you know, big companies, they don't be really thinking ahead like crazy people like me who'll spend $20 to buy the whole theater. That's beside the point. And they're getting their money. Who cares? Yeah, so. But September 3rd, the movie "Tenet" by Christopher Nolan's coming out September 3rd. So they want to open at least 2/3 of their locations country wide, nationwide I think, and then yeah.
Theaters in Atlanta, Chicago, Orlando, Boston, Houston, Dallas, and Denver will be open beginning the 20th, but states like New York, New Jersey, and California will remain closed until the foreseeable future. Bitch, this is so depressing. I want to go to the movies so bad. Who would have thought that I would have coveted a simple gifted life like going to see a movie on a Monday afternoon? Because that's when I would go. I used to like go to movies on the days I know, hey, kids are at school, people can't be going.
Like Friday night, Saturday, do not go to the fucking movies. Too many kids there. But Monday afternoon? Just you, girl. So, yeah, we'll see. This is so depressing. Yeah. Pam, Pam, Pam, Pam-Pam Pam, Pam. That's it, that's the intro. I don't have to say nothing else. Y'all know what time it is. Pam? Ms. Pam! Hey, girl.
PAM WIZNITZER: Hey, girl. What's up? We're sitting at home.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, that thing [? mush ?] my dear. I have to say, as soon as I see you here, my eyes are drawn to that beautiful yellow situation. What is she? Where is she from? Who is she from?
PAM WIZNITZER: Oh my gosh, thank you. She is many years old. She is definitely not-- she's definitely not from H&N. And, you know, just make it pop. She got a tan this weekend, so I had to wear like the bright colors, you know?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, yeah, you look great. Also, you look just like-- like the little LBD, the yellow, the [? tail. ?] You look fabulous, girl. And she is [? squinting, ?] yes.
PAM WIZNITZER: Thank you. If there are any straight men watching, just let me know, OK, girl?
[LAUGH]
MONÉT X CHANGE: The gaggles of straight men watching drag queens talks.
PAM WIZNITZER: Absolutely. I know they are all watching this. They are. Well, you look amazing, too. I saw you earlier. I love the hair. And the shirt, yes. We always gotta talk about your shirt.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Black--
PAM WIZNITZER: Black--
MONÉT X CHANGE: --trans lives--
PAM WIZNITZER: --trans lives matter.
MONÉT X CHANGE: --matter. Don't forget it!
PAM WIZNITZER: Never. We cannot forget. We will not forget. I love it. Well, it's August. I can't believe it's August.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I know. Has the summer not literally just-- well, it is the wildest thing. I feel like it was just March. Well, we were in this like weird thing for so long, as we know, and then the summer just happened. And now it's about to be done just like that.
PAM WIZNITZER: I know. We're going to have a long summer, and because we're going to have a longer summer, we definitely need a few more cocktails, right?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, amen, amen.
PAM WIZNITZER: You know, your favorite drink. And drinks that are going to be nice and light and refreshing to get us through, like, I think until the end of September. We're going to work that heat, you know? We're going to keep it going.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I'll be here for it.
PAM WIZNITZER: I am too. I am too. And this has been a very exciting time for you, because you got a cat.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I know. I was telling you this, she like tripled in size since I first got her. I wanted her to stay like a little-- when she first got here I was like, oh my god, I was afraid to even breathe too hard. I might blow hard and I might crush her or whatever. But now I want her to go back to being small. When they're really small, like, she was too big for her paws. Her paws were so big and her body's so tiny. And now she's like--
PAM WIZNITZER: Oh, she looked like she was gripping on for dear life on like a blanket. I was like, girl, calm down. Calm down.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, [? Collleen, ?] love her.
PAM WIZNITZER: I know. But look, we both became parents during quarantine. And when we become parents, you have a lot more worries and woes so you need a strong drink. But I thought we'd make an ode to [? Colleen ?] and also to you, and we'd do a drink called Colleen's Cooler.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, I like that. [? Colleen's ?] Cooler.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yes, [? Colleen's ?] Cooler. And it's fun because it's based off of a classic drink called a lion's tail. Get it? Lion's tail. [? Colleen's ?] Cooler.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, OK. I like that. I like that.
PAM WIZNITZER: But we're switching out a few of the flavors here and adding a little touch of Monét at the end, so I think it'll be a drink you'll really love. Also, for those who are watching, I did read all the comments. Thank you all for last time. I have a running list of things we're going to work on for future episodes. We have drinks out the wazoo thanks to all of you and what you want to have in your glass, so I'm pretty excited. I know. I do reply to comments, even though maybe you're not supposed to.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, do you? I mean, I read them sometimes. And there is one-- she stopped commenting halfway through quarantine. Maybe she died, I don't know. But this one lady will comment, every video she'll be like, trust in your lord and savior Jesus Christ, or else you will end up in the fiery purge. Every week it was a different scripture.
PAM WIZNITZER: Oh my gosh.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I personally enjoy chatting with her once a week.
PAM WIZNITZER: I love that. It's like a touch base and be like, still believe in Jesus? Still believe in Jesus. So. I've actually started replying back to the bots on Instagram, you know? When people are like, it was really great when I met Mr. Smith and I raised $15,000. You can too! And then I started replying, I'm like, oh, gee whiz. How did that happen?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Trolls. God bless them, girl. God bless the trolls.
PAM WIZNITZER: I'm so proud of how much free time they have.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right? Like give me some of that time, because I don't have it and I would love to have it.
PAM WIZNITZER: Reclaiming your time. [INAUDIBLE] your time.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Speaking of Monique Heart, I want to talk to her about that again, see if she hasn't forgotten all about it. Also, you sent me wine, which I'm very happy. Can I drink this yet?
PAM WIZNITZER: Oh, it's cider. If you'd like to take a-- it's actually dry apple cider, so.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I love cider.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yeah. So this is really good. We're going to use it at the end, and it's going to be just the top off. It's a dry rosé cider come from Wolffer Estate.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, this is so good.
PAM WIZNITZER: Isn't it great? So we're going to-- I mean, we should probably set this on the side while we make our drink, right?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Why not? We're not going to use all of it in the beverage, right? Have a little sip.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yeah, I know. So we're going to top it off at the end. But we're going to start with ingredients that you love. We're going to start with a little bit of lime juice and a bit of simple syrup, OK?
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK.
PAM WIZNITZER: So all about that fresh lime juice. I already pre-cut my limes.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Me, too. I pre-cut all of my limes.
PAM WIZNITZER: Oh my god, no! What is that? Monét! For all of you watching at home, please use a fresh line like Pam Wiznitzer is right here.
MONÉT X CHANGE: You know how much I love cutting limes. It's my favorite part.
PAM WIZNITZER: I'm going to let you have a pass because you're at home, OK? But if I'm in the studio, you know what's up. When we use fresh lime juice-- fresh lime juice-- we are going to use 0.75 ounces, so three fourths--
MONÉT X CHANGE: Which is the smaller one?
PAM WIZNITZER: That's it. And what's our measuring device called?
MONÉT X CHANGE: The jigger.
PAM WIZNITZER: The jigger, yes.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes.
PAM WIZNITZER: This is great. I don't even need to do this segment. Monét can do it by herself.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Could you imagine? It would be a mess if I did it, girl. Everything will be pre-cut, pre-everything.
PAM WIZNITZER: I know. That's why I'm here. Everyone needs a Pam. Everyone needs a Pam. All right, so we did 0.75 ounces of fresh lime juice. I made a simple syrup, I keep this in my fridge at home, equal parts sugar and water. You just shake it up. It's ready to go.
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK, fun fact. My friend Austin was here and she made margaritas from scratch, and she's a bartender. And she made me she-- which I just literally threw it out last night like an idiot. She made me this will full of simple syrup. But I threw it out last night, so I had to to the store to buy simple syrup. But she made me like fresh simple syrup, which I threw away like an idiot. But anyway, sorry.
PAM WIZNITZER: It is OK. Look, no, it's OK. Listen, as long as you have sugar at home and you mix with equal parts sugar and water, you have simple syrup. So it's easy to do, and you can make flavors. It's easy, no worries, you know? All right, depends how sweet you want it. I'm going to do 0.75 ounces, because rosé cider will dry it out. All right, now you don't have this ingredient, this is optional, and it's not always the easiest to find.
But a lion's tail normally is a bourbon drink, and one of the really key ingredients to a lion's tail is something called allspice dram or pimento dram. So it's like the allspice-- so kind of like Christmas in a glass. It's blends like nutmeg, clove, allspice. I'm just going to use a quarter ounce, which is going to give us a really nice spice overtone to the drink. OK? Just a hint. So if you can't find it, it's OK. You can omit this. It doesn't have to be in your drink. But if you have it, like me, add it into your cocktail.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Pam, is there a drink called like a Pat Collins or a Don Collins? Am I making that up? Something with a Collins?
PAM WIZNITZER: Tom Collins.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Tom Collins, OK. Yes.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yes, yes. You never forget Tom Collins.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I've had sex with a Tom Collins before, in my second year of college. He was a senior, I was a sophomore, and it was really bad sex. But that's neither here or there.
PAM WIZNITZER: Oh, I don't think I've ever done it with a Tom. I haven't.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Not even Tom from-- is it Myspace? Tom from Myspace? [INAUDIBLE]
PAM WIZNITZER: I would definitely on my Myspace page. Oh, god, remember those? And you put like some angsty--
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, girl. Top eight.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yeah, angsty music on and be like, this is my profile.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Well, the thing about Myspace is that you had to kind of be like a hacker. You had to like put the code in to do like a different background, and it was like a very mild encoding tutorial thing to be a good Myspacer.
PAM WIZNITZER: It was huge. I mean, that's like a [? band ?] [? type ?] [? agent. ?] I know people who met on Myspace. I was just coming off of Friendster a bit, getting to Facebook. But like Gen Z won't understand a bit of this conversation.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, they're all like, what the fuck is Myspace?
PAM WIZNITZER: What is that? Just know it's a place where like B-list bands played their music and got groupies.
MONÉT X CHANGE: The Gen Zs are like, you know, I don't really prescribe to my space. I'm of the variety that we should talk about our space together. Like all right, that was something on the website, girl.
PAM WIZNITZER: Our collective space.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Our collective space.
PAM WIZNITZER: There was like no TikToking though.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right. Oh my god, yes, Pam. You boutta-- unh.
PAM WIZNITZER: I can't. I don't even know what the movements are.
MONÉT X CHANGE: That was it! That was a woah. That was a woah. That was good.
PAM WIZNITZER: Was that it?
MONÉT X CHANGE: That was it.
PAM WIZNITZER: That it? Nailed it! I'm not even that drunk yet. OK, so the main ingredient here, and this is cool, so I changed out what would normally be bourbon to rum. Lots of reasons. It's still rum season. This past weekend, it was actually national rum day. And what we have here is one my favorite rums, which is Mount Gay From Barbados.
MONÉT X CHANGE: It's [INAUDIBLE], I think. Well if you have the accent, they call it, Mont Gay. Mont Gay Rum. That's what they say down there.
PAM WIZNITZER: Mont Gay?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Mont Gay.
PAM WIZNITZER: Mont Gay Rum?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, yes! Wow.
PAM WIZNITZER: This is Mont Gay Black Barrel. Black barrel. So it's cool. We have two different bottles here. So you have what was the original packaging, and there's a new packaging if you can find her on the shelves. So this one is blended by the brand new master blender, Trudiann Branker. You can see the signature here. And it's also great because she's their first master blender and she is native to Barbados. She's quite possibly one of most brilliant people I've ever come in contact with, and very fun.
And I just am always really blown away by her. And so she basically said, OK, rum is great. What if I can do a different blend, dry it out just a little bit, and make it more towards the palate of what people want right now? And this blend is stunning in this bottle. So, find it. Keep it.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Well, when I finish this one, I'mma go to the store and get me that one.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yeah. And that one's also beautiful, because they've been making rum since 1703, continuously.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, my mom loves this one. OK, my mom is a big alcohol drinker. My mom loves, loves, loves rum. She loves-- my mom, I love my mom. I want to get her on the show one of these days, but my mom doesn't have a computer. She doesn't have like a reliable-- my mom is an old black lady of the Caribbean that does not do this kind of stuff, but.
PAM WIZNITZER: Maybe when quarantine's listed it just means you have to go down there to do an episode.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, I'm absolutely going down there. I think I'll go down in November to see her for Thanksgiving, so we'll see.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yes.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Pam had some-- [? shady ?] [? had ?] [? fault, ?] so we had to readjust her audio connection.
PAM WIZNITZER: Shady. They were like, we're at 10% power. I was like-- I thought we were working for me today.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Going back to Barbados really quick, we did a story on "X Change Rate" how they're offering queer people, LGBTQIA+ persons to come and live on the island for a year and do whatever they want and like start businesses. So it's really fierce.
PAM WIZNITZER: So what you're saying is that you can go there for a year, you can drink some of the best rum, you can meet Trudiann Branker. So this is the best drink ever and this all makes a lot of sense.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, I love it.
PAM WIZNITZER: So super cool. So what we're going to do, it depends on the kind of day you had. I'm gonna add 1 and 1/2 ounces. If you want to add two, by all means. I know you have a heavy hand, Monét. But this is great. Also, just a really fast plug, especially for any viewers who are watching who might be cocktail makers, bartenders, mixologists of their own-- that's fine. Girl, I see you.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Hah! I'm gonna be fucked up for the rest of this show, girl. I'll be like, um, oh, Monique Heart.
[HICCUP]
I used to love the old cartoons like Tom and Jerry. Any time they were drunk they would just hiccup the whole time. So cute.
PAM WIZNITZER: I know. When I get the hiccups, I'm like, it's not cute.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right, right.
PAM WIZNITZER: It's just cute at all. Though I just want to plug this like fast. I just found out two days ago that [? black rose ?] is having a huge competition, a cocktail competition. So you can enter online via thirstymag.com. You can win $5,000 and a mentorship with Trudiann. And who doesn't want 5Gs right now for making a cocktail? So.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Bartenders, if you're watching this video, girl, gets you your 5K honey.
PAM WIZNITZER: Go chase that money. Chase that money. OK. Now take I chased that money, we're going to shake this drink. OK, so the drink will be topped up with cider, but we know you cannot shake carbonated things. So we're going to shake this first. OK, do you have your ice?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, I'm getting my ice right you.
PAM WIZNITZER: Always have your ice. How many ice cubes did you make today?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right now. Say it again?
PAM WIZNITZER: How many ice cubes did you make today?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh I made-- oh, girl, I always have literally eight trays in our fridge at all time. Because I had a little-- I had four people over at my place a couple of days ago. And girl, the ice just be running out, and it really gets me tight. Gets me so upset.
PAM WIZNITZER: I know, and you never know we're going to go with that bodega ice. Sometimes it's like the good stuff, sometimes it's like--
MONÉT X CHANGE: Exactly.
PAM WIZNITZER: What is this?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Exactly. You see, y'all people and you know fancy in Ohio and in Atlanta and LA, y'all have fridges that have ice makers. In New York, we gotta go down to the bodega to get ice, which is not cute.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yeah, go to the bodega. We got to do your laundry around the corner. I mean, it's not easy here.
MONÉT X CHANGE: It's too much.
PAM WIZNITZER: It's not easy. Sometimes you have to handwash your dishes, like.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I know. Like what?
PAM WIZNITZER: But we pay a lot of rent, so it's great.
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK, so I put the ice in the little silver?
PAM WIZNITZER: The little tin, that's right. So you put the ice in here, and we're going to put it into the large tin like this.
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK. Right, so I put the liquid in the large tin.
PAM WIZNITZER: That's right. And we're going to cap it with the ice. Cap it.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh! [INAUDIBLE]
PAM WIZNITZER: It's OK. She's doing great. She's doing great, all right? And now you make your shaker face. Ready? Set, and shake.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, let's [INAUDIBLE], right? Look at those nails while you shake. Little peekaboo friend. Oh, yeah, oh.
PAM WIZNITZER: All put together like it's nothing. I love it. OK, now that it's nice and cold, we're going to open it up and we're gonna hit the sides. Close enough, close enough. And then she opened the shaker.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh. OK.
PAM WIZNITZER: Got it?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes.
PAM WIZNITZER: Fabulous, OK. So the next part is going to be we're going to put a little bit of ice in the glass that we're going to pour the drink into, some fresh ice.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, yes.
PAM WIZNITZER: And then I'm going to teach you a little trick. Mhm. Because I don't know about you, but when I go to places and I get a drink like a mojito or a Tom Collins and that soda water is just like on top of the drink and not mixed in, I get angry.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I hate that. Right.
PAM WIZNITZER: I'm like, why isn't it all together? Why do I have to do the extra work of stirring it? This is BS, right?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes.
PAM WIZNITZER: OK, so the trick to make sure that that doesn't happen is, we're to take our sparkling rosé cider from Wolffer Estate. Love it, this stuff is super good. That's it, mhm.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I ain't wasting a drop. OK.
PAM WIZNITZER: Lick that straw. And we're going to actually take our big tin. Sorry, I lied. The big tin with the drink? Pour in a splash of it a bit, and now we're going to pour the drink into the glass. So what happens is, when everything pours out of the tin, It mixes together, right?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Got it, OK.
PAM WIZNITZER: And then we pour. Oh, she ready.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, girl.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yes. Oh god, this looks really good.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, I'm excited, honey. She looks great.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yes. And we added the cider because as we all know, Monét loves her green apples. So we have this drink that's [? Colleen's ?] Cooler, but the cider is for you, Monét. And at end we're just going to add an apple slice or two, however you'd like to have your garnish in there. But I will say, [? these are ?] just so fun. You can eat them, they're delicious, it can hang out the side or you can let it marinate in the drink itself. I'm going to cut a little slit and I'm going to have it hang off and be like all cute and stuff.
MONÉT X CHANGE: What would you do if I just like chopped my finger off?
PAM WIZNITZER: OK, we're not doing that in this episode of "X Change Rate." Stay tuned next time for [INAUDIBLE]. Yes, word, look at your glass. And then we're going to add a straw, and voila.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, this is good.
PAM WIZNITZER: This is good. And this is easy to drink. Now if you wanted to try it out, so you want to little more tart, I just add a bit more cider, and you're ready to go. And that's it. And that's going to be our Colleen's Cooler to keep you nice and cool the rest of this August.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Thank you, Pam. I just want this apple to soak up a lot of this alcohol so I could eat the little apple slice.
PAM WIZNITZER: That's it.
MONÉT X CHANGE: And let it be like, yeah, just like that, so I could just eat. Cheers.
PAM WIZNITZER: I love it. Cheers to you. Cheers to all of you
MONÉT X CHANGE: Tink! Come on, sound effects.
PAM WIZNITZER: Yeah.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, yes, this is good. It is nice and it feels very refreshing. I'm not just saying that. It feels very refreshing.
PAM WIZNITZER: And that's what it's supposed to be. Look, like, you don't have to do so much work at the end of August. And if you want, you could build this drink in the glass. It just has a little more pizzazz when you shake it and you look cooler in front of your friends.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes.
PAM WIZNITZER: Right? It looks really fancy.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Pam, I love you so much. This is never enough time with you. Thank you so much.
PAM WIZNITZER: I know. Thank you so much. And I hope you have a great rest of your summer.
MONÉT X CHANGE: You too, my dear.
PAM WIZNITZER: Keep [INAUDIBLE].
MONÉT X CHANGE: We will definitely do one of those hopefully before summer's done. If not, beginning of fall.
PAM WIZNITZER: Absolutely, absolutely. Capture the essence of everything changing.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, it's all nice and warm and cool.
PAM WIZNITZER: As if the world hasn't changed enough.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Pam, thank you so much. Listen, if y'all don't follow Pam, you better Pam. Pam, tell them where they can follow you on the Twitter, on the Instagram, all that stuff. And if people could do your bartending classes? Are those open to the public?
PAM WIZNITZER: So I haven't done the public ones, but I have been booked by people for their groups of friends, so you can reach out to me. I am available via Instagram, I'm @PamWiz. I'm on Cameo. You can book me on Cameo and I make cocktails on there specific for whoever you guys say you want it for.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, word. Oh my god, that is such a nice birthday gift. Buy someone a Pam Cameo and she makes you a specific cocktail for your person? That's fierce.
PAM WIZNITZER: I know. It's a Pameo! It's a Pameo. But if you have any questions, you can just reach out, happy to answer anything. If you make this drink, I will repost it. And, yeah, leave your comments. I want to hear what else you guys want to have.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, Pam, I love you so much. Thank you so much for taking the time to make some cocktails with me. I might give [? Colleen ?] a sip. I'm not going to-- save your comments. That was a joke. I'm not really going to give [? Colleen ?] fucking liquor.
PAM WIZNITZER: No, I was going to say, be selfish. Don't give it to her.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right. I just know know somebody's gonna be like, oh, I cannot believe Monét was going to give her cat alcohol. What a stupid bitch. I'm not gonna give my cat alcohol.
PAM WIZNITZER: You're a great cat mom. And because you're a cat mom, you get a good drink, OK?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Thank you, Pam. And you stay cool and enjoy the rest of your summer.
PAM WIZNITZER: You too. I'll see you soon, OK?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Bye, my dear. Mwah! Hello, world. Hello, America. Quick question-- why the hell is this the first time this bitch is on this goddamn show? Y'all, I'm not going to do no extra long intro, extra yadda ya. Make some noise for my good, good, good, good, good sis, Monique Heart.
MONIQUE HEART: Hello!
MONÉT X CHANGE: Mo, how are you?
MONIQUE HEART: Good. Good, good, good. Good, good, good. I'm blessed.
MONÉT X CHANGE: You look stunning. OK, Monique, in the past-- I mean I've always-- your mother's always been fierce. But I have to say the past like, what, year and a half, your mom is literally immaculate.
MONIQUE HEART: Ever since All Stars and I got [? ripped. ?] Thank you. Ever since I got bread, you know, by-- never mind, let me not shade her like that. I was about to say that white woman, spelt YTS. No, ever since Michelle-- I mean, you know what? Looking back at it, I see that my highlight was super bright, you know what I mean? And it was that traditional style of paint. I just find it very amusing that two seasons after Ru Paul, her best friend-- you remember that promo for season 12? She looked real pale up in here. All, you know, [INAUDIBLE].
MONÉT X CHANGE: You think so?
MONIQUE HEART: Look at the photo again, bitch. She put the extra brown on there. She was extra white up in here. I said, oh! So you gonna let her read me and then turn around and do the same thing. That's cute, you know. Sorry. You know, but hey, she gets to do a Nacho Libre mask with no rhinestones.
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK, Monique, when I went on the TV and I saw that, you know I didn't-- obviously the rumors are speculating about, oh, Ru got a dick and a tuck and whatever.
MONIQUE HEART: She couldn't have, because you can't put no kind of pressure on those, you know what I mean?
MONÉT X CHANGE: I didn't think about that. That makes sense.
MONIQUE HEART: That mask was too tight of a compression, and I don't see you pulling a facemask on this much, unless the bitch zipped in the back. [INAUDIBLE]
MONÉT X CHANGE: I was about to say, now they let them zip in the back.
MONIQUE HEART: You know she has money. However, I mean, I would prefer she came on television and like blew whipped cream all over her face and like rollers in her hand, but like, what's up?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right. I mean, that's like an iconic Ru Paul image, with that green face paint and the eyes out and the rollers in the row.
MONIQUE HEART: Done. You know what was really funny to me is that their look-- I mean, I know you were home. And on some level you really can't be mad at the bitch, cause he said, regardless of whether I'm in drag or not, I'm getting to shut that [INAUDIBLE].
MONÉT X CHANGE: [? Doubt. ?]
MONIQUE HEART: However, however, she could have put a little pizzazz. You remember in season 10 she had pink eye or Ebola, whatever she had? And she came in with the face mask and the glasses?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Ebola? Ebola? I cannot, Monique.
MONIQUE HEART: I'm just saying, she had something contagious. Anyway, you know, she had red lips on, a pony tail.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, [INAUDIBLE].
MONIQUE HEART: You know, I feel like you should at least show up for the [? game. ?] You know, when your name is on the show, bitch, I do what I want.
MONÉT X CHANGE: You know, Monique, something that we have not ever really chatted about, because for those that don't know, I love, love, love Monique. We got obviously really close in "All Stars" in season 10, and we check with each other here and there. Monique is just a good time, girl. I love you, love you, love you. But I never really asked you about, have you ever reconciled with that shade you put for that fucking car dress?
Because all to y'all shade, there I was like, oh, Monique turned his card off. And I remember when we're in the workroom and you brought that thing back the next day. We were like, bitch, you made that out of the cards? We were all gagging. Have you ever reconciled with those feelings of misfortune with the [? car ?] [? dress? ?]
MONIQUE HEART: No. But as I have worked, you know, in television for a while now, I see that production likes to do things that, you know, make people want to come back next week. Very much like Canada Drag Race, I feel like lip sync number one we were like, Juilliard? But I didn't see no Juilliard. But I did see that little white girl singing from her uterus, though, and she don't even have one, so.
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK, no, Monique, I gotta disagree with you. OK, you think that Juice Boxx is better than Lemon?
MONIQUE HEART: We can end this phone call right now, sis.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I'm sorry, Juice Boxx is sweet and everything, but just overall--
MONIQUE HEART: That girl sang that song. No, sis, that girl sang that song, OK? She-- you weren't-- bitch, and then she whipped her hair and sat down real slow in front of the judges? That's pussy. I'm not gonna lie. OK, so Juice Boxx hit a split. And I mean, here you go. I know she's a New York queen from Canada, and so New York queens kind of, y'all have an -ism about y'all when y'all lip sync. You know what I mean? So when she did that whole, touch, touch, I was like, OK? But I was just-- you know?
Episode one she was like, I went to Juilliard. I moved to New York when I was 19 and I supported myself, yadda da da da. I was like, oh, sister, this is about-- like this is the episode you want. You are about like bitch, don't make me-- It was very much like when you saw Brooklyn Hytes at the finale, like, oh, OK.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, shit. No, no, no, no.
MONIQUE HEART: What? The lip sync that she did against Yvie, I was like.
MONÉT X CHANGE: In her defense, in those finales, they got you doing lip sync after lip sync. Like I feel like the second and third--
MONIQUE HEART: Did you sign the $400,000? Did you sign the $400,000?
MONÉT X CHANGE: You did. You did, you're right. You're right. But it's like, I feel like after my second one I'd be so like, what else can I fucking give? It's just-- OK, here's my opinion, Monique. I feel like they need to do away with the finale 19 lip syncing for the crowns, and give every girl one black leotard and the same wig, and do the thing.
MONIQUE HEART: Bitch, right. Let me see you perform. Can you do it? No, truthfully, I think they need to go back to the year that Bob won or Naomi.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes.
MONIQUE HEART: Because truthfully, I think like, if you have made it to the top four, you have-- this is one thing that I think a lot of fans don't get. We all-- not we all. Here we go. When you go, some of us go and go, we're superstars. OK, we're here to show the word showbiz. And then you have other girls that go, oh, I'm the hot girl in the city. I might win, you know what I mean? While you're there, you will get critiqued. Your perspective will change. You'll get around different queens.
I'm not going to lie, my perspective of taking a song and wanting to subvert it, I learned from New York queens. That was not a thing that we were doing in Kansas City.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Kansas City, yeah.
MONIQUE HEART: To also kind of really play up this campy humor, also to work on comedy. Not just being like a bar like, oh, you're a bitch, dadda dadda da, but being able to land a joke? That is a skill and that is a talent. So I feel like as you have progressed and grown all the way through this, you get to go home, come back. I feel like a lip sync battle doesn't show why you won or why you even made it to the top four, you know what I mean? I feel like--
MONÉT X CHANGE: Agreed.
MONIQUE HEART: Bob, Naomi, well, Kim Chi or whatever, you got to see who that artist, who that entertainer is in their entirety, and then boom. Like it was iconic when Bob got down on the floor and then did a death drop. That was [? busted. ?]
MONÉT X CHANGE: You know what I mean? Like--
MONIQUE HEART: That was [? busted. ?]
MONÉT X CHANGE: I love, I love that. They need to go back to that. I agree, I agree. It's not-- Sasha Velour's year was cute. Our year, when Aquaria came out and that fucking half eaten burrito, and we're like, OK, a reveal is coming. We got it. Like, we need to go back to season eight. That's where you see it.
MONIQUE HEART: Yeah. I mean, here you go. Aquaria did peak in the finale. If Ru Paul didn't go, OK, I want three bitches for this bang bang song, Cameron would've won.
MONÉT X CHANGE: You think so?
MONIQUE HEART: Have you watched Cameron perform?
MONÉT X CHANGE: I think Eureka would have beat Cameron.
MONIQUE HEART: I don't think so. I think the only reason Aquaria loss to Eureka is because she had all this momentum and energy and didn't know how to control it.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, maybe. Yeah, yeah. But head to head, I see Eureka taking Cameron, only because Eureka is a little bit more of a captivating performer than Cameron.
MONIQUE HEART: I'm just trying to think of it. And I'm not shading Eureka. We just hung out recently. You know, she's negative on the COVID, I'm negative on the COVID, so we walked, you know, separate and apart from each other. The only performance that I remember of Eureka was like the Christmas queens one, and nobody was really giving it at the Christmas queens. Like you walked from side to side.
And Latrice is the only one who ever turns it at the Christmas queen. Those damn little-- Oh! Twirl. Those little damn twirl things, girl. She be killing the building, honey.
MONÉT X CHANGE: So we're gonna go back to "Canada Drag Race" a little bit. Thank you for your comments about the Ilona butt thing. Because I agree with you 100 percent. 100 percent. And I was like, thank god Monique is speaking the truth. Like, it is what it is. And I feel that the reason that they are reacting to Jeffrey that way is because of what you said. Can you please echo it for the people who have not seen it? It was so spot on.
MONIQUE HEART: You all are the-- "The X Change Rate." Whoa, anyway, let me cut that [INAUDIBLE].
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, yeah, we got you, we got you.
MONIQUE HEART: For those of y'all who are just tuning in to Monét's show, "The X Change Rate," it's pretty low. Fans hate Jeffrey because Jeffrey is giving these girls critiques that we all say at home, watching the television, to each other.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Tea.
MONIQUE HEART: So I think that this whole coddling of Jimbo like, oh, you shouldn't have said, well, use your time more wisely. Well, if she was the only one who complained about time, then why wouldn't I tell you as a judge to use your time more wisely, effectively, dot dot dot? Don't make the complaint. Like that's drag racing 101, you know what I mean? When it came to Iola-- Ilona.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Now you calling her Iola [? Vandan. ?]
MONIQUE HEART: I've messed up her name a plethora of times. One of my friends had to spell it out. It is Il-o-ha or uh or something like that. Yeah, that's how they said it. That's not-- I didn't say that, girl. I think she's very good. I can't wait to see what she looks like when she gets money, money, money.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Hello.
MONIQUE HEART: Hello. She gonna be pussy. Side note, did you lift for that little poodle costume?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, the poodle was so cute.
MONIQUE HEART: Pussy! So cute.
MONÉT X CHANGE: It was cute.
MONIQUE HEART: Still is.
MONÉT X CHANGE: As a whole, "Drag Race Canada's" runways aren't like the fiercest to me, but the poodle one, the Jimbo denim one is fierce to me.
MONIQUE HEART: Puss.
MONÉT X CHANGE: It's really-- it's so good.
MONIQUE HEART: No, Jimbo in the harness with the curls and red blonde hair?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes.
MONIQUE HEART: That's the thing. Sometimes I feel like she paints like close to modern life drag queens, because here you go. I was gonna say this. You will get this as a Ru girl. When you travel abroad, or just travel, you see drag queens-- and even the working drag queens that have the look of what Raven's mug was a few years ago. Like it's that hard line, you know what I mean? The brows all look the same. They have that, I do drag and now I'm pretty, look. And then after they've been doing it you have people like Vivienne [? Pinet. ?] It's not Vivienne [? Pinet. ?]
MONÉT X CHANGE: The Vivienne. The Vivienne.
MONIQUE HEART: Thank you. The Vivienne. Vivienne [? Pinet-- ?]
MONÉT X CHANGE: Monique! Let me tell you something. Monique is just [INAUDIBLE] Monique. Monique will fuck up a name if it's the last thing she do.
MONIQUE HEART: I don't mean no harm. I'm just, you know, anyway. So Vivienne, you know, Vivienne has a more elevated face, you know what I mean? And I just feel like the crazy thing to me-- I don't know. Never mind. Because you really can't say that. But you want to say like it's season technically 13, 14 of "Drag Race" in a sense, in the franchise. So I think going back to Jeffrey, I think when Jeffrey critiques or when we critique at home in the privacy of our home, you're looking at it like-- prime example.
If you see somebody in a leotard on "Drag Race" you're like, you know better. You know what I mean? You know better. You know that the whole thing needs to be elevated. Let's go back to, no shade, Denim and Diamonds. Now mine wasn't that cute.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, my Denim and Diamonds was trash.
MONIQUE HEART: Trash. And I thought that was the episode you was going home, but you did that whole, you are [INAUDIBLE] chasing my hair, ah ah ah! Girl, that was very pussy. I screamed. I did think you was going home, because I thought Mayhem was like-- she was going the five, six, seven, eight. I mean I said, oh, she's destroying here. Anyway, never mind. The point is, with your Denim and Diamonds, much like Ilona's, it was very much too like the cut of trap was not right, right? It also didn't flatter her body.
And then I get, like, as she's a non-binary-- or they're a non-binary person. I'm gonna make sure I don't jack this up. They're a non-binary. Well, actually I was about to say--
MONÉT X CHANGE: Listen, I say this with the show.
MONIQUE HEART: She's such a tramp, you know?
MONÉT X CHANGE: I mess up pronouns with them all the time. It's just that you recognize that I know I messed it up, and like we're in a safe space. So don't feel like if you fuck it up they gonna-- it's no cancellation.
MONIQUE HEART: I'm really not worried about nobody trying to cancel me. Because I'm telling you, I'm going straight to god, and it's not going to do well for your health. Next. So anyway, the point is this, the shape-- there is like a shape that needs to be. Drag racing is not like camp. It's not just like, oh, it's this kind of queen and this kind of queen. Drag is that. Drag race is a business, and when you get there, you have to conduct business. The runways are a big part of the show. Why?
We look forward to them. People make compilation videos. It can actually see you out of the bottom, depending on what you're looking. You know, it just needs to sell a shape. It needs to be elevated. And if you're gonna feel your fantasy and wear your raw butt cheek out, I'm not going to tell nobody to go get silicone like Detox and a few others that have been on the show. But I'm gonna tell you to at least make sure-- like Farrah Moan. She doesn't have necessarily the best ass in the business, but she at least makes sure it's bronze.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Right, down. And we saw that. We were there and she was back there.
MONIQUE HEART: And we saw the cellulite.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Farrah Moan slapped that bronzer and that foundation on her ass. Because she know that you're on high definition camera, and you can see every lip, crinkle, dimple, whatever that you may have. Like.
MONIQUE HEART: And like if Sasha Velour can paint the back of her head, I think you can paint the back of your ass, you know what I mean?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Hello.
MONIQUE HEART: And here you go. And I think it was probably a thing of, now she'll look back at it and go, hindsight 20 20. But when the fans look at it, the fans need to recognize and go, yup. You right. You right. Like you might not like him. You might not like it. And the reality, is I think Jeffrey's doing a fabulous job. People go, oh, he's just some new homo who decided to wear makeup and now he thinks he can critique [INAUDIBLE].
Well, first of all, he's critiquing them because he's getting paid. That's first and foremost. Second of all, as we've seen on "Drag Race" US, you don't have to necessarily have drag history in order to be a judge on a television show. Just saying. So I think people need to pump the brakes. Also, they need to reflect that same energy that they're sending to him to themselves, when fans who have just been watching the show or just caught on and now they're caught up and now they're a drag expert and want to [INAUDIBLE]. I feel like the energy needs to be either the same or canceled at all. But like, sit down.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, yeah. I feel that. Let's move on to you, Mo Mo Mo. "House of Heart." First episode-- so, in quarantine you started this digital show, which you have everyone in the drag business there. You have people, Roxxxy, Latrice, Jaida, everybody's doing your show. Talk to us about "House of Heart" and how was it birthed?
MONIQUE HEART: How was it birthed? I was sitting on the couch in my apartment and I was just like-- I actually truthfully, to be perfectly honest, I had an idea for a pageant, virtual pageant. And I wanted people to do it and I was like, how can I get money? And I didn't know. To be perfectly honest, I probably didn't move on it because-- here you go, world, when you a black queen and you try to make money money moves, sometimes they won't listen to you because of the melanin of your skin, right? Cause that has nothing to do with your talent. But they'll look at a basic bitch who ain't got no talent and give her a check.
Now this is the point. So since I didn't think I would get funding, I said, well, you know what? Let's do a virtual show. Because I really want to have my own television show, which I did pitch. So it's in the works. We're pitching some things, whoo, whoo, whoo.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Amen.
MONIQUE HEART: Right? But I said, until that kicks off, let me start here. So I wanted to-- how could I make my show different from "Digital Drag," which is Biqtch Puddin's show. You have "Black Girl Magic," which is Vixen's show. The [INAUDIBLE] people, we don't even count them. What? No shade. Like that's a whole different breed of bitches, you know what I mean? And you up there, so you know. Next, next. So you know what I mean? So you had the [INAUDIBLE] thing, and I think PEG did one, too.
But I was just like, you kept seeing all of these like no name queens that were like really turning some fabulous deals out. And for me it was just like, let's get international. Like I have a big fan in Brazil, the UK, Europe, and the States. So I'm just like, well, people love me everywhere and drag queens are everywhere. Well, let's get [? Sydney ?] drag queens, famous, non-famous, up and coming and, you know what I mean? And put them all in one show. And so it's very, very fabulous. It's not going to come out today, but the show is actually today.
And it's just great to really see. I get to use my platform and get to showcase people that I really think are amazing. Monét X Change needs to do one. When I did ask Monét X Change, she was not into the virtual drag, but I guess she's into it now, so.
MONÉT X CHANGE: The thing is, Monique, and you know this, like at the beginning of quarantine I did two digital shows.
MONIQUE HEART: Yeah, I saw you looking like Wakanda with that little short [? wind ?] [? thing ?] and the song. Whoo, whoo, whoo!
MONÉT X CHANGE: Girl, you know what I mean? And like the fans, everyone enjoyed it. But for me, personally--
MONIQUE HEART: It's not fun.
MONÉT X CHANGE: And you know this. You're in LA. You have a big open field. I am in my little hallway in New York City, stomping on I'll talk to my neighbor who has sent me death threats, trying to twirl and sing. Like it's just so cumbersome. So when I can get like a better space I can record, I would love to be a part of it, you know what I mean?
MONIQUE HEART: Yeah, for sure. You know, what I just did for this one that's coming out, I did a cooking tutorial. One, because I have not been inspired, to be perfectly honest. I have not been inspired to come out with all of this creative loveliness that, one, I can't sell, I don't profit off of. Like it's not mine, you know what I mean? So for me, it's just pushing me into wanting to write and create more. Side note, Monét, I got a music manager. Whoo whoo whoo!
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, word!
MONIQUE HEART: OK, so we'll talk about that in a minute. But it's just really been, like, I don't know, top 40s music really ain't doing it for me right now. I've been going back to like 2015, 16, even 18, even back listening to old school jams. Like it's just, I don't know. Everything kind of sounds the same right now. I don't--
MONÉT X CHANGE: You know, I had K Michelle on the show recently and she said the same thing. She was like, people just aren't-- artists aren't making music any more. She was like, back in the days she'd listen to an album and she was hearing like an artist, and now she feels like a lot of music she's just hearing songwriters who just sing their songs. It's an interesting point of view.
MONIQUE HEART: That's it. It's so, so true. Because you don't-- like here you go. Now I'm not a big T Swift fan, but I will tell you, Miss Swifty, she's a boss. And I will say, I'm not big a fan of her music. Like I haven't really divulged it. But I will say this, she's an amazing storyteller. And I will say that at least in this new-- now her album was a little too slow for me to perform, but at least it does tell great stories.
And I don't feel like music today is telling stories. I feel like everything is like, you want me, leave your man, I'm a bad bitch, you a bad bitch. Busty bitch. Datta datta dat. And it's just-- I don't know, it's not giving me the juice. So what I wanted to do for this show is I decided to do a cooking tutorial, because you know I can cook. And I wanted to support Chi Chi DeVayne. So I made this kind of gumbo Cajun--
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh.
MONIQUE HEART: Oh, bitch, you know I can burn in the kitchen.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, I know.
MONIQUE HEART: I'm on 300 plus calories.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Listen, Monique can cook. Monique can cook.
MONIQUE HEART: But that's just my [INAUDIBLE]. It's just really, like, it's weird. Music is so like-- do you remember when Daniel Caesar was still underground?
MONÉT X CHANGE: See, I don't really know a lot of it. The only song I know of his is "Best Part" with HER.
MONIQUE HEART: Oh, so good. Well, anyway. His music has been like that, and it's just been raw and real. So that's where I just kind of feel like the underground, no name people are really, really like-- you know, like even with female rappers I love, Megan Thee Stallion and, what is it, "White and Privileged" is a great song. Don't you love "White and Privileged?"
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes. I love it.
MONIQUE HEART: My friend said, we're calling it no longer [INAUDIBLE], we're calling it white privilege. The song is cute. I just wish that we-- like back in the '90s, do you remember how we had like Queen Latifah, MC Lyte, and we had Lil' Kim, Foxy Brown, you know what I mean, and others. And I feel like right now, at least the ones that get mainstream time, are just the Lil' Kims, and we know that's because sex sells. Like, you know.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Well, we have people like the Queen Latifahs, like Chica, that beautiful lesbian woman.
MONIQUE HEART: But is she mainstream? Is she getting that same kind of like mainstream?
MONÉT X CHANGE: That's what I'm saying. Why isn't she?
MONIQUE HEART: That's what I'm saying. That's what-- I feel like in times past, you could have both and, you know what I mean? I felt like, because, to me, you know, we're in this women empowerment movement. And I may have unpopular opinions, but I feel like at least back then you got the many different facets of a woman's perspective or a woman's whatever, you know what I mean? Nowadays I feel like because it's this whole, like, we're taking our power back, it feels like the power is just only on sex. And it doesn't get to-- like, oh, what's her name? I see her right now and I can't even think. Leikeli47. Am I saying her name right?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, Leikeli.
MONIQUE HEART: She is amazing. Leikeli. She needs to be way more big.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, I love her.
MONIQUE HEART: And she is like a talented artist. Like, you listen to her catalogue.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, she's great. Money. I've got money.
MONIQUE HEART: But you listen to her like other catalog, and she doesn't sound like the-- she has an ability to be very fluid in her artistry that is really, really, like it makes it-- I feel like even if Azealia Banks wasn't so damn problematic, if she would stop trying to do voodoo to get famous. Like, you can't sell your soul. I'm serious! You know, like we know people in the industry done sold their soul for millions and they got it. But she has sold her soul and still broke, and it ain't working, so maybe you should try Jesus.
We saw the video. She was cutting up them chickens with all that Santa Maria. She should've put some adobo and fried them chickens, because it surely didn't help her career. The point being-- it did! She should've fried them. Point is, like, she's another one that is so genius. And I really think Azealia Banks is a true artist, because she is-- in my opinion, she's on the scale. She is, you know what I mean? And I think that's why she kind of has her outburst. I think that's why she has that weird ass perspective.
And to be perfectly honest, if she was white, it would not be an issue. But because she is a dark skinned girl who has just tried to, I don't know, share her perspective, share her opinion, she's just been hated. Also she did start with that little girl, and that little girl did drag her ass. So she should have stayed in that house. [INAUDIBLE]
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, Azealia Banks is a complicated order, but you know, hopefully one day she'll--
MONIQUE HEART: But you want to eat it. You want to eat it, because the music is good.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, it's good. Now let's talk about your music, Mo. You dropped your EP at the beginning of this year, "Beloved 606."
MONIQUE HEART: 603.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Hot sauce and a high-- yeah. So it's Song of Solomon chapter six, verse three.
MONIQUE HEART: Hallelujah.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Tell us about the EP, and what new music you have coming up.
MONIQUE HEART: OK, am I good to go? Cause you started to break up.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, you look clear to me.
MONIQUE HEART: OK, OK. Song of Solomon 6:3, I just wanted-- this project was my first one, and it was my baby. And it was such, like, it was an expensive project. And I say that to say, a lot of people go, why do you have three like interlude songs? Like the three short songs? And it was because the producer was very expensive. And so he was like, this is how many--
MONÉT X CHANGE: People don't get that. People think that you just making music and it costs two cents. Making art is expensive.
MONIQUE HEART: Like he usually like stacks for one song. And you go, bitch, that's all I had for the whole thing. So like, he worked out a deal with me where I was able to get two full songs and then give three interludes. So one is the prayer. The second song is my single, SUKM, Shut Up and Kiss Me. The third is my favorite [INAUDIBLE]. It's, I moved to LA and then my life really fell to shit, and I just felt really overlooked and unnoticed. And the Lord kept singing like that verse over me for like six months. And then I just put it into a song.
And then we have "Black Mirror," which I made for the kids. Very, very kitty cat cat. And then we have "Smiles," which is Monét's favorite.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yes.
MONIQUE HEART: And it was just a beautiful thing. You know, the crazy thing I will also say about music is, if you don't have someone in the business, you really don't know. Like you think, oh, I'm gonna put out music and just, you know, record some music and put it out there. But the behind the scenes. Like you need money to just put it on this playlist, to get it in front of this one and that one. And you're like, so y'all hoes just want me to be in debt to really go nowhere and to not even chart. So that was just really, really frustrating. And then I came out with "Hot Sauce and High Heels."
MONÉT X CHANGE: But "Kinky Boots." So it was definitely, obviously a "Kinky Boots" sample, which is so beautiful and, like, a very sexy, red light district Amsterdam take on "Kinky Boots," which is so fabulous.
MONIQUE HEART: I released it before. And, you know, Brad Cameron was the guy who really worked everything out. I had had thoughts for the song, and then I met Brad Cameron, yeah. I think he did your video, correct?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, he did "Unapologetically."
MONIQUE HEART: Brad Cameron did, I think, your EP.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah. Yeah, he did "Unapologetically."
MONIQUE HEART: So I met him at one of those videos. I was like, I really love you, I would love to work with you. And he was like, I don't have no money to work with you, and he said, I'll find something. He did. He found me a sponsor, [? Adam ?] [? Mayo. ?] Thank you, [? Adam ?] [? Mayo. ?] I made that video. And, I mean, you know, the crazy thing is that there's so much pressure on not only drag-- I'm going to say, not only artists, but I would say even drag queens like a higher level than that.
Because we're just so critiqued, and so the pressure of making sure, like, your video looks good, the quality looks good. The looks are there, the makeup is better. The baby can't come late, girl. Like everything. The choreography. It's just so much. And, you know, so it's crazy. It didn't yield the fruit that I kind of wanted it to yield. But with everything, at least I can look back at my life and go, oh, bitch, I did it. Also, it's just a learning level. You know, one thing I love--
Did you watch that show with Cardi B?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Which one?
MONIQUE HEART: It's "Rhythm Nation," "Rhythm and Flow?"
MONÉT X CHANGE: I didn't see-- oh, the one on Netflix.
MONIQUE HEART: Yeah, is it "Rhyme and Flow" or "Rhythm and Flow" or something like that?
MONÉT X CHANGE: Yeah, it's "Rhythm and Flow." I don't watch it.
MONIQUE HEART: Yeah. It was really, really good. One thing that Fat Joe told one of the artists, he was a guest one day, and he said, just go back in the studio and really, really like hone your craft. And I think that, you know, there's no shame in the fact that, OK, I put this out and I've thrown. And, you know, even from "Brown Cow Stunning" to my EP to this latest track, it's just been nothing but growth. And I just love it. Like, I mean, you and me both love SZA.
And when you listen at the progressions of SZA, like each time she just got better and better. And so I'm just really, really excited for this next project. Not only because, one, I've struggled with writing, which is weird, as a song writer. Like I can sing everything I want. I can talk all day. However when I try to write my lyrics, like the biggest road block, the melody stops. The lyrics stop. Like everything just stops. And I have a song coming out on August 21st called--
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, word?
MONIQUE HEART: Yeah, "Better By Myself," with a queer artist named Jeordie. And working with his producer, he was just like, you know, there's really no shame in saying, hey, let's get a writing team to really come together and really make this great.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, 100 percent, yes.
MONIQUE HEART: And so I'm really excited. I'm going to be with some great writers. I really get to kind of do the sound. I think I'm going to move away from dance music, that kind of like, you know, kind of house dance sound.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Oh, yeah, yeah.
MONIQUE HEART: I recognize my sound is gospel, jazz, and funk music. And so if I can embody a queer drag queen James Brown meets Lauryn Hill meets HER slash Tiana Taylor Beyonce, without the--
[LAUGH]
MONÉT X CHANGE: Damn!
MONIQUE HEART: And Beyonce without the witchcraft. Yeah, Beyonce before, you know, before the dark side. You know? [INAUDIBLE]. That's what I want, you know, very best. I just-- that live performance. You know Fantasia Barrino, I feel like that's who I am. I want to like sting. I want to riff and scat like jazz notes, not like poop. You got to be careful, girl, because some people like, oh, you like scat, and then I got a new DM girl. No, ma'am. No, ma'am. No, ma'am. Unless you paying, you know? We can talk about it. You give me a copy zeros, girl, and I do mean more than two! OK? We can work something out.
MONÉT X CHANGE: More than the double two.
MONIQUE HEART: OK, look, I will gladly go to a taco stand and work you out, mister. OK. For a lovely party. Did you know, my friend-- this is stupid. This is why sometimes I don't understand why people don't take the money. Here you go. My friend was living in Kansas City, in the rich part of Kansas City, the plaza. And it's like the old, rich, white people, right? And one of his neighbors worked him, right?
First I think he started with like $250. And my friend worked him up all the way up to $1,500. $1,500! Not to have sex, not to massage, not to do nothing weird. Except for that man just wanted my friend to stand over him and just release flatulence. He just wanted him to fart on him. But $1,500? You wouldn't have-- I would have farted on that man. You'd do that for free! And you mean to tell me this man is gonna-- I said, you didn't take the money? You could have bought us drinks. We would've never known.
The dip was $1,500 for a fart, and didn't do it. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
MONÉT X CHANGE: I can't-- I never laugh like this, Monique. You are so god damn crazy, oh my god.
MONIQUE HEART: But wouldn't you take the money? You're gonna fart for free. I can get you a [? free product, ?] sir, what's up? Done. For $1,500? Bitch, I'm gonna fart for free.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Monique, you have to-- when we are in studio, we have to do this face to face in person. I love you so much.
MONIQUE HEART: I love you so much.
MONÉT X CHANGE: Thank you for being here, girl. I love you, love you, love you, love you.
MONIQUE HEART: Mwah! I'll talk to you later, sis. Bye!
MONÉT X CHANGE: OK, I love you. That was the show, y'all. Thank you so much for tuning in to another episode of "The X Change Rate." This was cute. This was a fun [? keke. ?] In case you can't see, my shirt says black trans lives matter, because they fucking do. And if you don't think so, don't watch the show. And comment below so I can block your ass. We're taking a small little end of summer hiatus for a few weeks. We'll be back in September with brand new episodes, but until then, I love you. And remember to always keep your currency in check. Peace. Peekaboo.