Yesterday, Reddit user goosearms asked a nerve-racking question to the AskReddit community: "What is the stupidest way you almost died?"
The thread quickly went viral, with thousands of replies. Here are some of the top-voted and best comments (and TBH, anxiety-inducing too):
1."I almost drowned in the sea as a kid. A current pushed me away from the shore. Lifeguards saved me and were slapping my face. I thought it was a punishment, but they were resuscitating me."
2."As a grown adult, I choked on mozzarella cheese. Was only alone for 20 minutes. Can't imagine the obituary."
3."I was at a water park in Texas with one of those super-tall, straight-down slides. They had multiple signs saying things like, 'DO NOT PUSH OFF BEFORE SLIDING DOWN!' I — being an 18-year-old idiot and wanting to race my friend — decided to push off."
"That extra push started my slow-motion, airborne flight over the slide. I was then staring 100 feet down at concrete and my other friend who had his jaw open. What felt like minutes later, I smacked back down onto the slide and made my way down to the bottom. Thank God for the engineers that planned for suicidal idiots like myself."
4."While drunk, I sat down outside to rest for a moment on a freezing-cold winter's night. Fortunately, a passerby noticed me and encouraged me to get inside. I figure I was probably there dozing off for several minutes."
5."I coughed and dislocated my C1-C2 vertebrae and spent six months in a body halo. IDK how close to death that counts, but be careful when you cough."
6."Cut my inner ankle on a glass cup. For those who don’t know, an artery is there, and I literally sliced through it. Almost bled out. Thankfully didn’t though!"
7."Almost got my head squashed by a car due to a small pebble making me fall on the main road."
8."Went to go visit a friend in Gloucester, Massachusetts (which is far from my home), during winter, back in high school. I was planning on staying overnight at their house, but their mother, who I now know has mental health problems, wouldn’t even let me in the house because the father wasn’t home 'cause he was working a night shift. Friend said, 'Sorry, bro' and closed the door."
"Almost froze to death waiting outside in 10 degrees Fahrenheit weather at night. A cab driver saw me slumped on a bench and woke me up. Let me get warm and drive around with him in the passenger seat, while he picked up drunk people out on the town all night. When he finished his shift, he dropped me off at the train station and handed me seven bucks for the fare. Dude probably saved my life, and I can’t even remember his name."
9."I snorkeled too far out into the ocean, and it wasn't because it was a riptide; I just got distracted by pretty fish."
10."Unplugging the washing machine with wet hands. My hand slipped onto the prongs while they were still partially in the outlet, and I think my heart stopped for a second before I yanked the plug free. Definitely do not recommend."
11."In second or third grade, I was getting off the school bus and was walking around to the other side to my driveway. Suddenly the bus driver hits the horn, scared the hell out of me, and I stopped at the edge of the front of a bus and a dump truck speeding around. I dunno if the dump truck driver didn't see the lights of the bus or whatever, but that driver made a dumb mistake that could have cost me my life."
"After that, the school district changed bus routes to avoid students having to cross the road to get on or off the bus."
12."I walked into a backroom freezer of a grocery store. The huge door was designed to close automatically. I knew this and went in and did what I was there to do. After 30 seconds, I couldn’t catch my breath. I thought maybe I was just working too hard, so I stopped and took several huge breaths — nothing."
"I felt like I was drowning out of water. I had to move as quickly to get outside of the freezer and I fell to my knees gasping when I got out. It was only afterwards I realized for some dumb reason someone kept open dry ice in a cart inside of the freezer.Dry ice removes oxygen out of the air in enclosed spaces. I almost died from lack of oxygen and would have been an icicle when they found me."
13."Drove on an interstate during a hurricane and watched all the cars around me get submerged."
"There was this huge 18-wheeler in front of me, and I got really close behind it and drove through the path it was clearing — it was spraying water on both sides, so I was able to do that until I got to the next exit and was able to get off and get to a little higher ground. I was living on a prayer!"
14."I had experience while snowboarding. Went with some friends up a black diamond run, but I was scared to fall that I squatted so I would have less distance to fall. Of course this only makes you go faster. So anyhow, I took a tumble while going full speed and then felt lightness — except for my hand that had caught what I thought was a branch."
"When the snow cleared, my hand was wrapped up in a red safety net, and I was hanging about four stories off the mountain. That was the most committed pull-up of my life. Great times."
15."When I was a kid, I dipped my toes into a flooded creek to 'see how it felt.' I proceeded to get sucked into said creek and nearly washed away. Thankfully, the creek had some overgrown areas, and I was able to cling to a tree in the middle of the floodwater and scream for help. This happened directly behind my house, so my dog heard me, alerted my dad, and my dad managed to rescue me."
16."Went to Grand Canyon and tried to be funny and acted like I was gonna slip and ended up almost really slipping and falling. Some random guy scolded me like a little kid because he got more scared than me."
17."A dealership I worked at had two man teams for the lube rack. Well, I was a lube tech at the time and was setting the lift on a full-sized pickup when my team mate started raising the lift. My head got caught between the lift and the frame. Thankfully, someone saw me and screamed at him to stop. I was seconds from getting my head popped like a tomato."
18."Stuck my head out the car window because I wanted to see why dogs loved it. My grandpa didn't notice, rolled up the window, and I choked. He freaked out when he heard the cat-like noises (ironic) I was making while my neck was trying to squeeze through the small opening of the window, but kept raising the window in his panic. Eventually he got it, and I was left with a red mark on my neck and no closer to understanding dogs."
You can read the full thread of responses on Reddit.
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.