Sounds about right.
1. Los Angeles Dodgers (44-23; Previous: 1) – Lakers' championship gets Dodgers to thinking, you know, they haven't won without Shaq, either.
3. New York Yankees (37-29; Previous: 3) – So far, Curse of MT has shown itself in eight losses to Red Sox, toilet that won't stop running in clubhouse and eerie, late-night groans from direction of bullpen coach.
4. Milwaukee Brewers (37-29; Previous: 6) – Brewers thus far unable to make deal to upgrade rotation; rival GM's reluctant to get Melvin-ed.
5. Philadelphia Phillies (36-28; Previous: 4) – Reality show “The Pen” debuts on MLB Network, Lidge voted out after first episode, Condrey gets a little weepy.
7. New York Mets (33-31; Previous: 7) – K-Rod goes after Bruney, Bruney backs down, K-Rod screams and points to sky at moment of surrender.
8. Detroit Tigers (35-31; Previous: 5) – Former Tigers bust Matt Anderson insists octopus toss did not injure his arm. Did, however, admit to some discomfort after mahi mahi fling.
9. St. Louis Cardinals (36-31; Previous: 10) – Other Joe Buck kept in a small room off the broadcast booth at Busch Stadium, fed cheese fries and watered-down Bud Light in between HBO gigs.
10. Los Angeles Angels (35-29; Previous: 13) – Torii Hunter's(notes) losing streak continues Monday at AT&T Park: “All those years I've challenged the wall and I'm 0-16 against those things.” On bright side, he's way above .500 against bat racks.
12. Tampa Bay Rays (35-33; Previous: 14) – Not dead yet: Rays winning, Kapler mashing, Bartlett healthy, Friedman sorts through Percival and Isringhausen body parts, builds one closer.
13. Cincinnati Reds (33-32; Previous: 12) – Dusty particularly enjoys Sunday's flavored toothpick, by sixth inning amused to learn he'd been chewing on little Daniel Herrera instead.
14. San Francisco Giants (34-31; Previous: 15) – Sabean puts virtual Lincecum to work around office; fetches coffee, makes copies, blows whistle into phone when reporters call.
15. Chicago Cubs (31-31; Previous: 11) – Hendry says Cubs need “different voice” at hitting coach, new guy Von Joshua to start with Bugs Bunny, maybe mix in a little John Wayne, because he does a pretty good John Wayne.
17. Atlanta Braves (31-34; Previous: 16) – Contract grievance not getting much traction, so Glavine considers sex discrimination suit.
18. Seattle Mariners (32-34; Previous: 19) – M's have given it a little more thought and decided Morrow will be a "stareliever." That's once and for all. No more waffling. A "stareliever." What?
19. Chicago White Sox (31-35; Previous: 20) – Guillen on Wrigley: “I puke every time I go there.” Weird, so do half the guys in the bleachers.
20. Florida Marlins (33-35; Previous: 18) – Hanley says if Marlins pitchers don't start protecting him he'll be afraid to hit home runs; also kind of creeped out by spiders and that Spanish moss stuff.
21. Colorado Rockies (33-33; Previous: 24) – Jim Tracy says this team reminds him of '04 Dodgers; unfortunately, '09 Dodgers might be better than '04 Dodgers.
23. Houston Astros (30-34; Previous: 23) – Pudge sets record for games caught in a career, judging by energy level (OBP .280), caught half of them in the past month.
24. Kansas City Royals (29-36; Previous: 25) – Hochevar throws 80-pitch complete game; Opposing Reds later admit Swing Like Vladdy Day might have been a bad idea.
25. Oakland A's (28-37; Previous: 22) – Relievers think all those young starters are cool and all, but they're really starting to get heavy.
27. Cleveland Indians (29-39; Previous: 26) – Indians win when gnats swarm, birds cloud, eye pride of lions at city zoo.
28. Arizona Diamondbacks (29-38; Previous: 28) – A.J. Hinch calls team meeting, D'backs beat Greinke. That's right, it's a little somethin' called managin'.
29. Baltimore Orioles (29-37; Previous: 29) – Wieters hits first home run, gets curtain call, leading in mayoral race.
30. Washington Nationals (18-46; Previous: 30) – Lerners better get going with those negotiations; Acta has Strasburg starting Sunday against Blue Jays.