MLB Power Rankings: Tigers at the top

On the Marlins’ love for home, Elvis Andrus’ green streak and loyalty oaths in New York:

The rankings (records through Wednesday):

Detroit
Detroit

1. Detroit Tigers (20-9; Previous: 7) – The Tigers must say, the Astros are really, really adorable.


Milwaukee
Milwaukee

2. Milwaukee Brewers (22-13; Previous: 1) – Ryan Braun would really like to be your silly rabbit.


San Francisco
San Francisco

3. San Francisco Giants (21-13; Previous: 12) – Apparently Matt Cain was getting in some extra work on the cutter.


Oakland
Oakland

4. Oakland Athletics (20-15; Previous: 2) – A’s claim Buss, immediately cleared to use special lanes on Bay Bridge.


Colorado
Colorado

5. Colorado Rockies (22-14; Previous: 13) – More thrilling than Sharknado? Arenado!


Washington
Washington

6. Washington Nationals (19-15; Previous: 9) – C. Lee-Span way, way more interesting than C-SPAN.


Los Angeles
Los Angeles

7. Los Angeles Dodgers (19-16; Previous: 5) – Dodgers play longest games in majors. Much of the down time spent trying to get Yasiel Puig’s attention.


Atlanta
Atlanta

8. Atlanta Braves (18-15; Previous: 3) – Braves have been shut out five times or, as it is known, El Cinco Blanco by Mayo.


New York
New York

9. New York Yankees (18-15; Previous: 6) – Jersey guy Lawrence Blatterfein can’t open anti-Red Sox bar called “Buck Foston Roadhouse.” Settles for “Flatterbein’s Tavern.”


Miami
Miami

10. Miami Marlins (19-15; Previous: 23) – Marlins are best home team since J.D. Salinger.


Baltimore
Baltimore

11. Baltimore Orioles (17-14; Previous: 21) – Hardy declines to address contract talks back-and-forth. Happy to discuss Ping Pong game, however.


St. Louis
St. Louis

12. St. Louis Cardinals (18-17; Previous: 8) – Cards straining to keep up with Brewers, might have to start jettisoning excess weight. Looking at you, Fredbird.


Texas
Texas

13. Texas Rangers (17-17; Previous: 4) – Washington asks Andrus for more energy. Andrus reveals he’s a little concerned about his carbon footprint.


Boston
Boston

14. Boston Red Sox (17-17; Previous: 16) – Rivera chooses Pedroia over Cano, which angers Yankees fans who last week booed Cano, and now we all disappear into the worm hole.


Seattle
Seattle

15. Seattle Mariners (17-16; Previous: 27) – Yankee fans booing Cano for taking the money is like Charlie Sheen booing Justin Bieber for his life decisions.


Los Angeles
Los Angeles

16. Los Angeles Angels (16-17; Previous: 15) – Arte Moreno scouting sites in Irvine and Tustin for new stadium location. In either case, thinks he found a great place for press box in Fullerton.



Toronto
Toronto

17. Toronto Blue Jays (17-17; Previous: 11) – Dickey called upon to pinch-run, goes base to base on random, meandering path.


Tampa Bay
Tampa Bay

18. Tampa Bay Rays (15-19; Previous: 10) – Rays play for the benefit of a bobblehead in Boston, which might seem bad, but the Marlins have been doing that for years.


Cincinnati
Cincinnati

19. Cincinnati Reds (15-18; Previous: 20) – Saw where Billy Hamilton is learning when to steal bases. Apparently, “when he gets on base” is not the final answer.


Chicago
Chicago

20. Chicago White Sox (18-17; Previous: 25) – Jose Abreu first to be named outstanding AL player and rookie in first month. Also, developed some strong opinions about deep-dish pizza.


New York
New York

21. New York Mets (16-17; Previous: 22) – Fans unwilling to sign loyalty pledge think Wilpon probably understands their hesitance: plausible deniability.


Kansas City
Kansas City

22. Kansas City Royals (16-17; Previous: 14) – Game day means different things to different teams. For the Royals, it’s at least 27 opportunities to keep up with Abreu in home run race.


Minnesota
Minnesota

23. Minnesota Twins (15-17; Previous: 26) – Strange but kinda sweet: Minneapolis and St. Paul still dress alike.


Philadelphia
Philadelphia

24. Philadelphia Phillies (15-17; Previous: 24) – Sandberg gets trapped in Broad Street Run, proves season not a marathon, but a panicky sprint.


San Diego
San Diego

25. San Diego Padres (15-20; Previous: 19) – Padres so offensively inept they couldn’t hit the ocean if they fell out of their ballpark.


Cleveland
Cleveland

26. Cleveland Indians (15-19; Previous: 17) – Kottaras hits two home runs Sunday, is DFA’d on Tuesday. Monday was sort of non-descript.


Pittsburgh
Pittsburgh

27. Pittsburgh Pirates (14-20; Previous: 18) – “Talk Like A Pirate Day” apparently much more fun than “Pitch Like A Pirate Day.”


Arizona
Arizona

28. Arizona Diamondbacks (13-24; Previous: 30) – D-backs happy to turn calendar page. They have one of those year-by-year calendars.


Chicago
Chicago

29. Chicago Cubs (11-21; Previous: 28) – Renteria calls closer situation “fluid.” So’s water-boarding.


Houston
Houston

30. Houston Astros (10-24; Previous: 29) – Here we defer to Twitter account @astroscounty: “Astros jump from ‘Others Receiving Votes’ to 30th in this week’s MLB Power Rankings.”

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