Dr. Saturday - NCAAF

Gloat Forever. Or for a week, whatever. Just make your margin. You've got one more day to celebrate USC's 69-0 reaming of Washington State with PeteCaroll.com's $69 Sale, and to make Trojan reporter/blogger Scott Wolfe a little queasier:

There's just something unseemly about turning a 69-0 victory over a beleaguered opponent into a sales opportunity. If Stanford sells T-shirts about beating USC, so be it.

But USC does not tie sales to blowouts over helpless teams. Or wear black socks. Or wear names on uniforms. And yes, I'm well aware of where the proceeds go, which is not the point.

As John Robinson used to tell players who celebrated touchdowns excessively, "act like you've been there before.''

To be clear, there doesn't appear to be an actual shirt with 69-0 on it. But even Pete Carroll himself felt bad about trouncing the hapless Cougars. Didn't USC expect to put up 60-plus, like, I don't know, almost every Pac-10 team Washington State plays?

Auburn at rock bottom, they hope. As bas Auburn's second half collapse at West Virginia looked on TV, it was even more depressing in person:

Let's begin by discussing the end. I was on the field in the closing minutes. It was lifeless. At least near the end of the Arkansas game, Tommy Trott was going around on the sideline shouting encouragement and trying to fire people up. Tonight, Auburn players looked cold and many of them hustled off the field when the game ended.

John Solomon goes on to say Tommy Tuberville remains committed to the spread, some of the time, because he's committed to Kodi Burns, but also thought Thursday night felt like "a play-out game to avoid the Papajohns.com Bowl." If only Auburn was in position for that: at 4-4 with Georgia and Alabama still ahead, "an ordinary football team" is pretty generous. Solomon openly speculates on the wish list to replace Tuberville, and it's same old, same old: Butch Davis, Lane Kiffin, Will Muschamp, Joe the Plumber. There's only so many jobs that quartet can accept, you know. In the meantime, Tuberville's just hoping to piece things back together over the last month, while trying (or pretending) not to look over his shoulder.

Jonathan Williams, you've just run for 115 yards in a win over Houston. What are you going to do now? It hasn't been a very good October for East Carolina's Jon Williams. The Pirates' early surge fell by the wayside after three straight losses, and their leading rusher was arrested on Oct. 5 for failing to cooperate with officers responding to a domestic dispute. So you can understand why he was feeling somewhat, uh, frustrated last Saturday:

GPD Cpl. Kip Gaskins said at the news conference that a 20-year-old man and a 19-year-old woman told police at Pitt County Memorial Hospital that Williams [...] hit them with a beer bottle. They said the incident occurred outside an apartment in North Campus Crossing in northern Greenville about 1:14 a.m. Sunday.

Actually, Williams had a 68-yard touchdown run against the Tigers, so maybe he was just so jacked he felt he had no choice but to attack someone with a bottle. That won't be happening again: he's suspended indefinitely.

Well, they led Notre Dame at one point. San Diego State is 1-6 for the second time in three years under Chuck Long, played a game earlier this year in which it Long will get a fourth year, according to Aztec AD Jeff Schemmel, who cited the inherited disaster from the Tom Craft administration as reason for incredible patience:

“When you couple the (scholarship losses) with the injuries we have, it becomes a game of attrition. I'm going to hold him accountable, but, to be fair, I need to hold him accountable when he's got a full plate.”

I'm not sure Long's plate will suddenly be "full" after six years of futility and turmoil at SDSU, but hey, another year in San Diego must be nice, right? It's beautiful there, even if you're finishing in last place.

Quickly ... Tony Franklin is really discovering Auburn, now that he's no longer employed. . . . Gary Patterson has banished a couple of three-letter words. . . . Best bet on the next coach at Washington: Boise State's Chris Petersen. . . . Florida State has suspended receiver Bert Reed against Virginia Tech for missing too many classes. . . . Terrelle Pryor's old high school fans landed on his feet, for now, at Hampton. . . . And meet Notre Dame's unlikely new kicker, to the extent he can be known.

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