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Power Rankings: Rays rule the roost

Rays manager Joe Maddon said this week he’s rooting for a Tampa Bay-San Diego World Series, revealing he’s rooting for old pal and Padres manager Bud Black.

A “Pad-Rays” World Series?

“Ugh,” he said, cringing. “You said that, not me.”

Anyway …

Week 6:

Tampa Bay
Tampa Bay

1.Tampa Bay Rays (24-10; Previous: 1) – Rays play second imperfect game inside a year, on a positive note believe they’ll benefit in second half from rested legs.


New York
New York

2.New York Yankees (22-12; Previous: 2) – Yankees to have July games televised in 3-D, Girardi hoping it gives injury-ravaged team more depth.


Minnesota
Minnesota

3.Minnesota Twins (22-12; Previous: 3) – Twins have hawks in scoreboard, falcon on foul pole, Tigers in back pocket.


Philadelphia
Philadelphia

4.Philadelphia Phillies (20-13; Previous: 5) – Moyer becomes oldest to throw a shutout, actually thought hardest part was finding warm, comfortable nap spot after third and sixth innings.


San Diego
San Diego

5.San Diego Padres (21-12; Previous: 6) – Stauffer researches symptoms on phone, determines he should call doctor. “Blown appendix? There’s an app for that.”


St. Louis
St. Louis

6.St. Louis Cardinals (20-15; Previous: 4) – Agent says that in terms of upcoming contract, Pujols is “on island by himself,” then gathers indigenous rocks on beach to spell out, “$O$.”


San Francisco
San Francisco

7.San Francisco Giants (18-14; Previous: 7) – Molina suffers hamstring injury, club reports ailment hasn’t in any way hurt his speed.


Texas
Texas

8.Texas Rangers (19-15; Previous: 17) – Selig considering “best interests of baseball” clause to seize control of Rangers, while at it just might get himself one of those big cowboy hats.


Detroit
Detroit

9.Detroit Tigers (20-15; Previous: 11) – So long, Ernie. Thanks for always making it about the game.


Boston
Boston

10.Boston Red Sox (18-17; Previous: 13) – After getting stink-eye from world leaders over economy issues for weeks, exasperated Youkilis explains for last time he’s not the Greek God of anything, he’s freakin’ Romanian.


Oakland
Oakland

11.Oakland Athletics (18-16; Previous: 10) – On a perfect day at the Oakland Coliseum, Braden makes the 209 proud, 210 including the irascible grandma.


Cincinnati
Cincinnati

12.Cincinnati Reds (19-15; Previous: 19) – Reds keep promise and bring back fan favorite Uncle Phil’s Dusseldorf Mustard. Sadly, unable to follow up on condiment pleas with better table setters.


Washington
Washington

13.Washington Nationals (19-15; Previous: 15) – Nats dispute report they’ll hire Bryce Harper’s JC coach. Are, however, looking to fill opening in transportation department with Harper’s driver’s ed instructor.


Toronto
Toronto

14.Toronto Blue Jays (20-16; Previous: 20) – League announces Jays will play next month’s scheduled home series in San Francisco, cites Rotary 5K Run and Gaston desire to, you know, get out and see the world a little.


New York
New York

15.New York Mets (18-16; Previous: 8) – Wright duped by real estate scam, not surprisingly gets very little sympathy from owner.


Colorado
Colorado

16.Colorado Rockies (16-17; Previous: 12) – Rockies accuse Phillies of stealing signs with binoculars; when reached for comment, Phils bullpen coach pauses, points and shouts, “Land ho!”


Los Angeles
Los Angeles

17.Los Angeles Dodgers (17-17; Previous: 23) – Torre reportedly will not return if divorce leaves ballclub in disrepair. On bright side for Dodgers fans, Torre thinks that after divorce there’ll be something left of ballclub!


Los Angeles
Los Angeles

18.Los Angeles Angels (15-21; Previous: 9) – Rally Monkey losing enthusiasm, discovered napping in seventh by nosey clubhouse attendant.


Atlanta
Atlanta

19.Atlanta Braves (16-18; Previous: 21) – Chipper says he won’t be retiring, but thinking about coming in later in the mornings and maybe taking Fridays off.


Florida
Florida

20.Florida Marlins (16-18; Previous: 16) – Uber-prospect Mike Stanton(notes) hits 500-foot home run in Double-A, Loria docks his paycheck for cost of ball.


Seattle
Seattle

21.Seattle Mariners (13-21; Previous: 14) – Sweeney gives impassioned speech, challenges clubhouse leaks to a fight; Griffey furious nobody woke him up to watch.


Chicago
Chicago

22.Chicago Cubs (15-20; Previous: 22) – Starlin Castro(notes) makes three errors in Wrigley debut, gets booed, wonders why everybody’s so jumpy around here.


Chicago
Chicago

23.Chicago White Sox (14-20; Previous: 26) – Jerry Krause named head of club’s international scouting department, wants to make it clear he was not the one who recommended Michael Jordan play baseball.


Milwaukee
Milwaukee

24.Milwaukee Brewers (15-19; Previous: 24) – McGehee promises club will not “roll over,” not above begging, fetching or chewing the occasional shoe, however.


Arizona
Arizona

25.Arizona Diamondbacks (14-21; Previous: 18) – Given new immigration law, D'backs advised their safest place is at home. Possibly explains all the strikeouts.


Cleveland
Cleveland

26.Cleveland Indians (13-19; Previous: 25) – Turns out, Indians not most hated team at all. If nothing else, reversal gets the season highlight reel started.


Pittsburgh
Pittsburgh

27.Pittsburgh Pirates (14-20; Previous: 29) – Pirates shut out over two days on 192 pitches, running streak to 19 consecutive Buc O’s.


Houston
Houston

28.Houston Astros (13-21; Previous: 27) – Astros manager ejected for first time. Umpire explains he turned up nose to Mills’ tone.


Kansas City
Kansas City

29.Kansas City Royals (12-23; Previous: 28) – Royals fine Betancourt for dropping pop-up, create first-ever infield fly pool.


Baltimore
Baltimore

30.Baltimore Orioles (11-24; Previous: 30) – Keeps going like this, Orioles seriously considering moving to Target Field scoreboard. Or foul pole.