Namely, that this year's new addition to Wrigley Field can't be thrown on the field (à la Carlos Zambrano), dumped over anyone's heads in celebration (à la Guy Morriss) and provides a significant injury risk for any frustrated Cub who's deplaning the playing field.
At least Dempster proved it can be roughed up pretty good, attacking the drink dispenser
in the name of increased brand recognition after walking in two Pirates runners during the top of the third in Monday night's 10-8 loss to Pittsburgh.
But fear not, Will Carroll-types. Dempster made sure to use his non-pitching left arm for the assault, preventing a self-inflicted injury. (Then again, considering his right arm is 3-3 with a 4.99 ERA after signing a big contract in the offseason, maybe Dempster should be making sure to keeping his left arm in tip-top shape. You know, just in case.)