Haaland converted a Rodri-won, VAR-awarded penalty that was not without some controversy, then thudded in a Bernardo Silva cross after halftime to provide the goals.
It might've been a humiliation on another day, as Andre Onana made seven saves including several point blank interventions to deprive Haaland another hat trick.
Man City moves second on the Premier League table with 24 points, above Arsenal on goal differential and two points back of Tottenham. City and Spurs meet on Dec. 3 at the Etihad Stadium.
Erik ten Hag's United seem years removed from the team that supplied last January’s controversial derby win at Old Trafford.
The Red Devils sit eighth with 15 points, eight points off fourth place.
Mistakes by the dozen as shameful hosts controlled at Old Trafford
Look: Manchester City may be the best attack, possession, and defending team in the world, but this is Manchester derby at Old Trafford.
It can't be this bad. But it was.
Erik ten Hag's season may not be out-of-control on the Premier League nor the Europa League tables, but the performances are terrible and, really, unforgivable. The incredible growth last season has dissolved into a system-less shrug of guesswork on the pitch.
And it was a mess from the get-go. Consider the risks Ten Hag took without much reward.
Sergio Reguilon sat in favor of Victor Lindelof at left back
Also kept out of the XI: Combined $175 men Mason Mount and Antony
And Jadon Sancho is still 'learning lessons' away from the team.
Manchester City is art work
What's better than Manchester City when they are blowing someone out by five?
Not sure, but it could be Manchester City just toying with a rival away from home.
City was so organized in defense, limiting United even when the Red Devils managed exchanges that weren't desultory.
The champs out-attempted the hosts 21-7 and put 10 shots on target. Their 61% possession was more than enough because the attack produced a wild 3.93 xG and allowed just 1.03.
Spurs are shining and Arsenal is charging, but the second-place team in the Premier League remains the overwhelming favorite to win everything in its path.
Man City host Bournemouth at 11am ET Saturday, a rare midweek off before returning to the Champions League on Nov. 7 at Switzerland's Young Boys.
Manchester United vs Manchester City final score: 0-3
Goal: Haaland (26', 49'), Foden (80')
Phil Foden goal: Haaland defers to pal
Haaland could've had a hat trick when Onana pushed a Rodri shot away for his seventh save of the night.
But the Norwegian puts it on a plate for the hungry Phil Foden and it's 3-0.
Erling Haaland goal video: So pretty from City
It's so fluid from City.
Jack Grealish holds up the ball and waits for Bernardo Silva, who steams around the left end and chips a cross to the back post.
Erling Haaland had one thumped header saved by Andre Onana earlier, but this one sails into the center of the goal.
We'd say too easy, but it's not. It's just executed with complete understanding.
Manchester derby halftime analysis: City lead 1-0 on Haaland pen
Erik ten Hag will be grateful to arrive to the break down a single goal, but he'll also know the precious few chances his team have found were wasted.
Rasmus Hojlund and Scott McTominay will both feel they should be on the scoreboard, even if their chances amounted to a total of 0.29 xG.
City, meanwhile, has 61% of the ball, 1.54 xG, and a 7-4 edge in shots. Four of them have gone on target and Andre Onana has two massive interventions which have kept United in this.
All to play for, as they say.
Close! Ederson, Onana make huge saves
Man City hasn't given up much, but Ederson's been up to the task whether off a Rasmus Hojlund heavy touch or, now, a big save.
Scott McTominay gets the ball centrally atop the 18 and it settles nicely for him to rip a rocket toward goal. It's central, however, and that gives Ederson the license to make a strong one-handed save.
The corner comes to nothing.
Now it's City at the other end and Onana flies through the air to deny a charging Haaland header from crossing the line.
Erling Haaland penalty goal: VAR sends Norwegian to the spot
Rodri was screaming for a penalty but Paul Tierney was not convinced, and let the game go on for at least a minute while VAR chief Michael Oliver saw something in the video.
Paul Tierney has been sent to the screen to take a look at Rasmus Hojlund's grab of Rodri on free kick into the Man United box.
There's been some time here, but it would be difficult for Tierney to not go with the VAR review.
Erling Haaland has rolled his penalty to the other side of Onana. 1-0.
Early stages are City-heavy but nervy
Man City is certainly the better unit, with an Andre Onana paw the reason Erling Haaland didn't have an early tap-in goal for 1-0.
Rasmus Hojlund has led one long foray for United and Scott McTominay hit a tepid shot to Ederson on an earlier one.
The fouls are heavy, and the derby vibe is real. 0-0 after 17 minutes.
How to watch Manchester United vs Manchester City live, stream link, start time
Kick off: 11:30am ET, Sunday (October 29)
TV Channel: Peacock
Online: Stream via Peacock Premium
Man United vs Man City lineups
— Manchester United (@ManUtd) October 29, 2023
Your City XI for the Manchester derby!
XI | Ederson, Walker (C), Stones, Dias, Gvardiol, Rodrigo, Bernardo, Foden, Grealish, Alvarez, Haaland
SUBS | Ortega Moreno, Phillips, Ake, Kovacic, Doku, Gomez, Nunes, Bobb, Lewis#ManCity | @etihad pic.twitter.com/X2D4iIdcvh
— Manchester City (@ManCity) October 29, 2023
Manchester United vs Manchester City prediction
I'm going for a narrow 2-1 win to Manchester City but United will try and make this as ugly as possible and hang in there until half time. If they can do that, don't rule out a draw. But City's attacking quality is unreal and they have so many options in the final third and Haaland is back to his best. That will make the difference on derby day.
Focus on Manchester United
This derby is all about one thing for Manchester United: staying in the game as long as possible. If they are level at the break, then the likes of Marcus Rashford and Bruno Fernandes can start working their magic and United will be a threat on the counter. They have surprised City in recent years and won this fixture at Old Trafford last season. But this is a big ask given their poor recent form and their lengthy injury list. The Red Devils are without Lisandro Martinez, Luke Shaw and Tyrell Malacia in defense but Casemiro could feature as he returns from injury and was suspended for the Champions League win against Copenhagen. Aaron Wan-Bissaka has an outside chance of being in the squad, while Jadon Sancho is still missing due to disciplinary issues and Amad Traore is out injured.
Focus on Manchester City
City are clicking through the gears and Erling Haaland is warming up nicely. His battle with Maguire and Raphael Varane should be epic and City also need a big display from Rodri in midfield to stop Bruno Fernandes having a big impact. Guardiola could start any of his host of wonderful attacking players, with Foden, Grealish and Alvarez all pushing to start. Injury wise, Kevin de Bruyne is the only player missing, while Manuel Akanji is missing through suspension after he was sent off in the win against Brighton last weekend.
How many goals does Erling Haaland have this year?
It has been a casual start to the season for Erling Haaland, as he has scored nine goals in nine Premier League games and leads the league. Standard. He has also scored another two in the Champions League so make that 11 goals in 14 games in all competitions so far this season. And there are some people out there questioning his form (seriously) so far this season. Doubt Haaland at your peril.