It's technically true that abstinence is truly the only safe sex, don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise. But a life spent underwater is the best chance you have to avoid sunburn, and an unfettered existence as a member of the Bayaka tribe in the remote jungles of the Congo is likely your best chance to not be offended or at least annoyed by a member of the Kardashian clan. Just sayin'.
A.C. Green, David Robinson, and Barry Sanders don't say. They rap. They rap about abstinence, and thanks to our friends from the Found Footage Festival, we have the video to prove it.
"Man, I'm through. I'm down with the honeys." Says that guy.
Inadvertent hat-tip (we didn't see it when they initially posted it last month) to Deadspin.)