Like us everyday working slobs, NBA players need vacations to recharge and prepare for the rigors of their jobs. The differences, of course, are that they make millions of dollars per year, can afford untold opulence, and pretty much have to take those trips during league-mandated offseason breaks.
However, these world-class athletes still value the basics, like friendship. Take, for instance, LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Chris Paul, and Carmelo Anthony. This quartet grew up together from their AAU days into professional stardom, and like any tight-knit group they sometimes like to vacation together, in this case in the Bahamas. It's just that, when they take photos of themselves, they're a little more notable than when Chad, Zander, and Kolton show off their nascent dadbods on a rented boat in the middle of a Midwestern lake.
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This photo posted to Wade's Instagram isn't just a normal red wine toast — it's a red wine toast featuring four superstars with 38 All-Star selections between them:
Wade posted this photo with the caption "#BrotherHood," a hashtag that hopefully refers to some exceedingly goofy private nickname instead of just some random mistaken capitalization. It's a nice sentiment, although the photo itself indicates both an eternal bond and four 30-something men whose lives and careers have taken separate paths.
Let's break it down, from left to right:
• Dwyane Wade: Here is a man who feels he has nothing to prove. Wade's posture and general nonchalant attitude towards the toast project immense comfort, a feeling that three titles and a decade-plus of relevance is enough to justify any decision. He is worth $20 million per season, even if the market does not always tell him as much.
• Carmelo Anthony: If Wade expresses comfort with his decisions and lifestyle, then Melo has gone way past that zone and towards not caring about anything at all. The poor fit on the hat is particularly concerning for someone who probably employs a personal milliner.
• Chris Paul: Oof, that death stare is worth a thousand distasteful words directed at a mistake-prone teammate. CP3 is so lost that he has to wear a shirt with his own nickname on it, as if there were no other way to remind himself that he has value and purpose.
• LeBron James: The best player in the world looks in control, comfortable, and content, because he has never allowed the publication of an off-court photo that shows anything else.
We hope that the four friends and stars enjoyed the rest of their vacation. We will be over here searching for any apparent reason to make fun of them, because they are living out everyone's wildest fantasies.
ALERT! SPECIAL BONUS BANANA BOAT PHOTO!
• Gabrielle Union: Appears to understand that she is mere accessory to this vacation between friends.
• Dwyane Wade: Genuinely having the time of his life.
• Chris Paul: Either hurt himself or really, really wants to go home and curl up in a ball.
• LeBron James: Gearing up to enter this banana boat in the next America's Cup.
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