Like most basketball-playing males between the ages of 16 and 38, Kobe Bryant(notes) has a simple pre-game ritual: He watches "White Men Can't Jump" two or three times, eats some tilapia sliders and thinks to himself, "Man, I'm totally going to dribble like Sidney Dean tonight." And like most of said males, he doesn't actually do it; he's far too busy being one of the greatest players in NBA history to waste time experimenting with mimicking Wesley Snipes' wholly unbelievable floor game.
Luckily for the Mamba, the Phoenix Suns — who are just as likable as can be, by the by — weren't putting up too much resistance against Bryant's Los Angeles Lakers in the first half of Game 2 in their Western Conference finals series on Wednesday night. This gave Kobe the freedom to don his metaphorical Colnago cap, put on a dazzling dribbling display ... and promptly get his lunch money stolen by Jared Dudley(notes). The fightin' pride of Boston College then shoveled the ball ahead to Jason Richardson(notes), who went up to the seventh floor and dropped gravity off at the fifth.