Herschel Walker apparently has decided the best way to counter the reports that he paid for at least one former partner’s abortion is to tell bizarre anecdotes about bulls who get multiple cows pregnant.
During a rally on Tuesday with Arkansas Sen. Tom Cotton (R) and Florida Senator Rick Scott (R), the Georgia Senate candidate wrapped up his speech with what Mediaite called “a janky parable” about a bull who got three different cows pregnant.
Although the story’s point was apparently about how the United States is the best country in the world, audience members are forgiven if they related it to recent reports that he fathered numerous kids out of wedlock while publicly criticizing “absent fathers.”
Here’s the anecdote in all its glory:
“And they’ve been saying, ‘Something is better somewhere else.’ And I’m here to tell you it’s not. So, I been telling this little story about this bull out in the field with six cows, and three of them are pregnant. So, you know he got something goin’ on. But all he cared about is keep his nose against the fence, looking at three other cows that didn’t belong to him. Now all he had to do is eat grass. But no, no, no. He thought something was better somewhere else.
So, he decided, ‘I want to get over there.’ So one day, he measured that fence up, and he said, ‘I think I can jump this.’ So that day came where he got back. And as he got back and as he took off runnin’, he dove over that fence, and his belly got cut up under the bottom. But as he made it onto the other side, he shook it off and got so excited about it. And he ran to the top of that hill, but when he got up there, he realized they were bulls too.
So what I’m telling you don’t think something is better somewhere else. This is the greatest country in the world today.”
Here’s a video of Walker sharing the anecdote on the campaign trail.
Herschel's closing remarks in Carrollton pic.twitter.com/5p4VVsOVGE
— Niles Francis (@NilesGApol) October 11, 2022
Not surprisingly, many Twitter users thought the anecdote was pure bull.
Jesus God, it's the nonsensical cow/bull story again.
GAGOP: a vote for Hershel Walker is not a vote against anybody. It's you, in the voting booth, making the conscious decision to vote for a man who can't even make a random anecdote about a cow make a modicum of sense. #gapolhttps://t.co/EFJljwaaER
— Teri Anulewicz (@tanulewicz) October 11, 2022
Look at Tom Cotton's face when Walker talks about how the bull near three pregnant cows has "got something going on."
He's smiling and then ... he's not. https://t.co/Oq0KzNBdgA
— Aaron Blake (@AaronBlake) October 11, 2022
Is this a parable about fathering children and abandoning their mother whenever things get hard? Tracks. pic.twitter.com/FLvWgpg28p
— Anthony Michael Kreis (@AnthonyMKreis) October 11, 2022
The best part is the people in the crowd who think they've just heard something profound, not the bumbling of an idiot...who probably ought not be making pregnancy jokes at this particular moment. https://t.co/35djeWEB4l
— J.C. Bradbury (@jc_bradbury) October 11, 2022
What is even this Herschel Walker quote?!
Are women cows?
Why is the bull jumping the fence….
…..Like how is he even competitive against Warnock?! https://t.co/1oWkoDOyaw
— Atima Omara (@atima_omara) October 11, 2022
Wherein Herschel Walker admires a bull for impregnating three cows, but admonishes the bull for lusting after three other neighbor cows... a self-metaphor?? 🤔 https://t.co/L3hsXOaP5A
— Lauren Windsor (@lawindsor) October 11, 2022
If this was a boxing match, they'd end it now. https://t.co/HiD1XBGuPU
— Joan Walsh (@joanwalsh) October 11, 2022
This article originally appeared on HuffPost and has been updated.