Any savvy business professional will tell you that after you've written a children's book, made a "friend for life" in the supreme leader of North Korea, traveled to the Vatican to promote "pope betting," thrown salt on the game of the greatest player in the world and trumpeted yourself as a worthy recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize, the next (and, really, only) logical step is to develop your own branded vodka.
We're glad Dennis Rodman's being logical.
For those of you who've always felt kind of weird about drinking vodka that wasn't Dennis Rodman-themed, worry not — Bad Boy Vodka is on the way. Provided you live in California, that is — distribution there will apparently begin July 27, which only gives our vodka-loving Californian drinkers about 2 1/2 weeks to start calling their local liquor stores and demanding they carry the only vodka personally endorsed by a man who made eight (8) All-Defensive Teams and one (1) regrettable movie with Jean-Claude Van Damme.
More from the announcement press release:
"I'm excited to launch Bad Boy Vodka and work with Dennis and Jorge [Olson of Premier Brands Inc.] to create a high quality, fun lifestyle brand," commented Andreas Johansson of AB Partners LLC.
"Bad Boy Vodka characterizes a tough and edgy, yet smooth and classic taste; a perfect representation of whom and what I am all about," stated Dennis Rodman.
"High-quality," "fun lifestyle," "smooth" and "classic" are basically the top four phrases that come to mind when I think of Dennis Rodman, so yes, this definitely seems like a match made in
heaven hell because Bad Boy.
The branding picks up on Rodman's time with the late 1980s/early '90s Detroit Pistons, the so-called "Bad Boys" who bruised and battered their Eastern Conference competition, won back-to-back NBA championships in 1989 and 1990, and sharpened up a piece of steel named Michael Jordan who'd spend the better part of the next decade carving his way through the rest of the NBA. It's been a long time since Rodman left the Motor City — a full 20 years, if you can believe it — and lots of younger fans might remember Rodman more for the two noteworthy-if-tumultuous years with the San Antonio Spurs or, more likely, his eventual link-up with Jordan, Scottie Pippen and Phil Jackson to rip off the Chicago Bulls' second three-peat of the '90s.
Still, given the public persona Rodman's cultivated over the years, "Bad Boy" remains a fit, and apparently, it (and the bull mascot the project kind of cribs from Rodman's second title stop) looks great on the product.
"The bottle is a work of art," according to Premier's Olson.
If you're wondering how legit this all is, let me just assure you that "Premier Brands also owns the ZizZazz line of nutraceuticals," and also that the vodka's website A) explains what vodka is; B) invites you to "get reachy" with this vodka and those who drink it; C) reminds you that "You are AWESOME | DON’T EVER FORGET IT" and D) has what's sure to be a must-read blog kicked off by a post with the grammatically sound headline, "What type of girls does a Bad Boy gets?" So, y'know, rest easy.
We're sure this is the beginning of a beautiful and fruitful business relationship that will make Dennis Rodman the first name you think of when you combine "NBA," "liquor" and "questionable behavior," which he surely wasn't already. We can feel that Nobel Peace Prize getting closer with every
Also, quick pro-tip: When you ask your retailer of choice if they carry Bad Boy Vodka, make sure they don't think you mean Ciroc. They'll probably think you meant Ciroc.
Hat-tip to Brian Packey at Detroit Bad Boys.
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