Debra Messing opens up about struggling with body image during 'Will & Grace'
Looking back on her time with "Will & Grace," actress Debra Messing now realizes she put her health and wellbeing at risk for the sake of her looks.
The actress, 51, reflected in a Friday appearance on Jameela Jamil's "I Weigh" podcast on her struggles with body image working as an actress in her 30s when the hit sitcom first began. She was a size 8 at the beginning of the show and says she worked her way down to a size 2.
"Every time I would go in for a fitting, I couldn't fit into clothes," Messing said of her early days on the show and experiences with red carpets. "80% of it I couldn't fit into and I would leave just hating my body and hating myself."
Messing, who says she was diagnosed with depression around the same time, thought her life – and the lives of the people working to dress her – would be "so much easier" if she lost the weight. She did, but still didn't feel it was enough. Now, she says, it was too much.
"I was way too skinny," she said. "But, you know, going in for those fittings, I fit into everything. And all of a sudden, I literally could fit into anything that was high fashion. So all of a sudden, everything seemed to open up for me, because I was a 2."
Messing's first Emmy nomination came in 2000. She recalled a rollercoaster of emotions: Initial excitement, but then dread over feeling like she wasn't thin enough to belong on the red carpet.
"This was supposed to be the greatest time of my life, being nominated for best actress in a TV show I loved for an Emmy and walking on the red carpet," she said. "I walked out and I immediately felt so incredible and then I was standing next to all of these other actresses who were half my size, and I felt fat and I felt ugly."
Ultimately, she realized that remaining that thin wasn't good for her physical or mental health.
"I got sick," she said. "My body just could not hold out. My adrenals crashed, I was exhausted and it just became clear to me that I couldn’t be healthy and a size 2 at the same time."
Twenty years later, Messing wishes she had been kinder to her younger self.
"I look back at those pictures and I was beautiful," Messing said. "And I mourn the fact that that was my interpretation of reality and that was the torture that I put myself through."
If you are suffering from an eating disorder and want to speak with someone, call the National Eating Disorders Association helpline at 1-800-931-2237, text 800-931-2237, or chat online.
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This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Debra Messing opens up about body image struggles on 'Will & Grace'
