Dave Gettleman offers most NYC defense of Daniel Jones, says guy at bagel shop liked the pick

Coleman Bentley
Embattled New York Giants general manager Dave Gettleman has offered up a strange defense of an even stranger draft pick.
Embattled New York Giants general manager Dave Gettleman has offered up a strange defense of an even stranger draft pick.

Honestly, we don't know what kind of bagel shops New York Giants GM Dave Gettleman frequents, but from the sounds of things, they're well-lit, cheerful places piled high with $45/lb lox and insufferable sycophants. Weird topping for a bagel, you say? Well, according to Peter King, the embattled architect of one of the most calamitous NFL Drafts in recent memory went on record this weekend to defend the team's sixth-overall selection of Daniel Jones by citing...a guy at a bagel shop. Take it away, Peter, we need to take a timeout over here:

I was writing outside on a lovely early Sunday morning in Phoenix, at a table in the back of my hotel. Middle-aged guy approaches, introduces himself. “Giants fan,” the guy said. “Talk me off the ledge. Does Gettleman know what he’s doing?”

“I’ll give you one,” Gettleman himself said over the phone an hour later. “I was at my bagel shop this morning. Guy said to me, ‘Dave, great pick.’”

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Now Gettleman is still pretty new in town, but allow us to offer a little piece of advice: Never listen to anything any stranger has to say to you in New York EVER. It could be the freakin' Dalai Lama himself; if he makes eye contact with you on the 2 or cracks a joke in line at Zucker's, you DO NOT ENGAGE. There's just something about all this concrete and all these fumes that turns the best and brightest of us into bumbling manic messes with seven cats in rent-controlled Upper West Side apartments that make the Library of Congress look short on dusty old reading material. The last thing you want to do is give this person access to even the most remote sliver of yourself. The last last thing you want to do is use them as a means to justify reaching for a QB with average arm strength and questionable decision making at the top of the first round.

The most remarkable aspect of this story, however, is not that Gettleman has found validation in a fellow pumpernickel lover, but that there's even a single living soul in New York who thinks that taking Jones at six was a good pick. That, friends, is the only miracle 34th Street will see in a good, long while.

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