Dad faces backlash after trying to convince his son to sign a prenup: ‘She doesn’t earn as much as him’

·3 min read

A father is concerned his son might be marrying a “gold digger.”

He took to Reddit’s “Am I the A******? (AITA)” forum for advice. His son John is getting married to a woman who makes less money than him. John asked him if he could get some of his trust fund money early to pay for the wedding. But the father insisted John get a prenup beforehand.

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“I have 4 kids. My eldest John (27M), was with my first wife who died when he was 5,” he wrote. “I eventually remarried and got two step-daughters, Lisa (25F) and Ann (18F). Then my second wife and I had Mike (13M). My wife and I made sure to give them comfortable lives. When John and Lisa graduated from university, we gifted them condo units. We will do the same when Ann and Mike graduate. Also, all of them have trust funds that will be released when they turn 30.”

“I’m quite proud of my kids. John and Lisa graduated from top universities. John has a high-paying job as an engineer while Lisa pursued a master’s degree in business while she worked in marketing. Eventually, she started her own marketing consulting firm while being a part-owner of a spa.”

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“John recently got engaged to his girlfriend of 2 years and they want to get married by the end of this year,” he said. “She seems nice. However, she doesn’t earn as much as him. My son spends a lot of money on her, on dates and expensive gifts. I understand that it’s his money and he can spend it however he wants. She also moved in with him in the condo that I gave him, and as far as I know, she doesn’t pay her share of utilities and association fees. And now John is asking to get part of his trust fund so he could use it for the wedding since his fiancee doesn’t have much money to contribute for their wedding.”

“Now here’s where I might be the a******. I told him I’d release part of his trust fund early if he draws up a prenup with her. He got angry and told me I was being unfair because I released half of Lisa’s trust fund last year to help put up her business. He told me that I was playing favorites. I told him that Lisa did something worthwhile with her trust fund, and while a wedding is worthwhile, I told him it doesn’t seem safe to use his fund for a wedding to a girl ‘who doesn’t bring much to the table’. I told him that I just wanted him to have some security by drawing up a prenup. He got angrier and said I was implying that his fiancee is a gold digger.”

People had mixed reactions to the father’s demands.

“Your post screams that you do in fact play favorites as far as your kids,” a user wrote.

“A trust fund is a privilege not something your son is entitled to,” another commented.

“I think the concern is viable and sincere but the execution is what was poor,” another said.

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