Create-a-Caption: ‘I must kill … the Queen … City’

Ball Don't Lie

We know your intentions were pure, Paul Silas. You thought having Tyrus Thomas undergo hypnotherapy treatments during the offseason would help get to the root of his sometimes unbalanced floor game, instill in him a deep, strong foundation of positive reinforcement that could curb his wilder tendencies, and help him maintain focus during the extended lockout and the shortened season.

Instead, though, it wreaked havoc on his inner equilibrium, leading to across-the-board drop-offs in his shooting, rebounding, assist, steal and block percentages, a career-low Player Efficiency Rating and, occasionally, a thousand-yard stare that makes you wonder what that cut-rate therapist (thanks, MJ) actually implanted down there.

Whoops. Talk about your all-time backfires, coach.

Best caption wins a 35-year-old candy circle that will almost definitely make you sick, plus some waxed mint floss, because old caramel does not go down without a fight. Good luck.

In our last adventure: Let Kevin Garnett whisper in your ear, Glen Davis. He'll say the words you long to hear: He's in love with you. Ooooh-ooh-ooh-ooh.)

Winner, Mr: Davis: "KG, I ended up in Orlando so fast you never got to finish the story. Tell me how it ends."

Garnett: "... and they all lived happily ever after."

Runner-up, Nate: "Rockabye, Baby, on the treetop / When the whistle blows, your shorts will drop."

Second runner-up, The Devil: Early production stills from Season 3 of "The Walking Dead" have elicited accusations that the show is further jumping the shark by including zombie basketball.

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