Some teams employ assistant coaches to work with big men on their low-post games. The Miami Heat pay Keith Askins to make sure injured players look as crispy as possible. Step one: Wear socks that wouldn't look out of place on a 14-year-old faux Wiccan standing betwixt Hot Topic and Spencer's Gifts.
Best caption wins important lessons about dressing like a grownup. Good luck.
In our last adventure: Protect your eyes, Benny!
Jason Terry: "I sure hope so, Benny the Bull. Or else, what the hell are we trying to save?"
Runner-up, the nafi: "This way, you won't have to see us choke in the playoffs again."